Cold enough for ya?

Bill:
Dear Arctic Vortex, I hate you. Love, Bill.

 

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Doug:
Damn you humans and your Catastrophic Climate Change™

 

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Bill:
There's only one way out of this climate death spiral...

 

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Bill:
We need more celebrities crisscrossing the globe in their private jets and dramatically beseeching us plebes to stop being so fucking selfish and wasteful.

 

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Doug:
And don't forget our politicians.

 

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Bill:
Absolutely. Nobody cares more about this planet more than our beloved celebrities and politicians.

 

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Doug:
Meanwhile, while we are dutifully and patriotically checking the air pressure in the tires of our fusion vehicles, Putin is doing donuts in his personal tank with his bemused bumptious grin on his face.

 

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Bill:
Putin says catastrophic climate changes smells like victory.

 

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Comments

[Chairman Meow]

Ah, you humans why go out into such awful weather? But, why insist that we're going to all be living in a tropical world, when all evidence shows that weather is random and beyond your species control. We are superior and do what we please, when we please. You humans can do that.

[Harwich Rich]

I think we need a sacrifice-Where'd that cat go?? ;O

[Bob]

It's so cold (how cold is it?), lawyers have their hands in their own pockets. (Sorry sdu.)

It's so cold, cops yell "thaw" when chasing criminals.

It's so cold, snowmen are being charged with breaking and entering.

It's so cold, my ReaDoll's nips are all full and pointy. Oh, wait. They're always that way.

[Harwich Rich]

Just kidding ;D

[lc]

I got your cat right here. I'll bring it over tomorrow.

L. Davis

[kr]

Soxaholix has been in my rss feed almost since it started, but these climate strips are ridiculous. 2013 was the 4th-hottest year on record. They had to cancel parts of the Australian Open this month because of extreme heat and people passing out/hallucinating. It being cold in one region in the winter doesn't mean that the planet isn't keeping more heat than it used to. Come on guys.

[Chairman Meow]

In ancient Egypt, you humans were sacrificed to US. Just saying.

[Steve in MD]

mfy's sign Tanaka - 7 years, $155 million. May his career be shorter and less hailed than Dice K's.

[COD]

I think the Chairman won that round Rich.

[Steve in MD]

The climate has been changing since the atmosphere formed a billion years or so ago. It will always be changing. It has been much warmer and much colder than it is (on average) now. It will once again be much colder and much warmer than it is now. Is something happening that is causing it to change more rapidly now than in the previous centuries? Undoubtedly. Do we know for sure what's causing it? Probably not, but too many people is at least part of the problem. But one thing is for certain - for us mammals it's always been better to be around when things are getting warmer, than when things are getting colder (people dumb enough to live near or below sea level near the coast aside). Putin is indeed celebrating - warmer temps mean more domestic wheat production, which has always been Russia's biggest Achilles heel.

[kr]

We know for sure that certain gases humans are emitting at high rates trap heat much more than other gases do. So we do know.

Also, would you consider the owners of Fenway Park among those "dumb enough to live near or below sea level"?

http://ens-newswire.com/2013/10/30/climate-change-puts-red-sox-fenway-park-at-risk/

[Colin]

Well let no man say that New York cannot find new ways to throw their money away, Tanaka for 7/155? And they learned nothing from our Matsuzaka failure?

[Cmdrflake]

There goes the money saved by not having to pay AFraud...

[COD]

They only saved one year of salary on AFraud, right? If he doesn't retire (which he certainly won't do) won't they have to pay off the balance of the contract when they cut him?

[Steve in MD]

We know for certain that the gases humans emit trap more heat ALL OTHER FACTORS BEING EQUAL. We also know for certain that all other factors are not equal. The latest IPCC assessment makes clear that deforestation is at least as important a factor as CO2 emissions.

[Paul in DC]

ah, a day for setting straight confusions...
1, cartoonish jokes are good fun, the planet is certainly warming beyond historic natural cycles, and fossil fuel combustion is without doubt a primary reason.
2, yes the yankers will have to pay a-fraud for three more years after the suspension, unless they can find a legal way to void his contract, a possibility for which a-fraud seems determined to give them ammunition.
3, tanaka is a big gamble, and it may pay off, but the team in ny needed to take that gamble far more than the team in boston did, which is a good thing.

[yazbread]

I suggest signing Harold Sakata.

[kr]

And the Yankees will have to pay A-Rod just over $3 million this year because the suspension's for 162 games, but players are paid for over 180 games. So he's not even really off their payroll this year.

[Chops]

kr -

It's a comic strip.

[Chip]

Chops-
Oh, but it's so much more than that.

[ponch]

sorry to be pedantic, but it's often misunderstood and as an editor it drives me nuts:
be·muse
biˈmyo͞oz/
verb
past tense: bemused; past participle: bemused

1.
puzzle, confuse, or bewilder (someone).
"her bemused expression"
synonyms: bewildered, confused, puzzled, perplexed, baffled, mystified, nonplussed, muddled, befuddled, dumbfounded, at sea, at a loss, taken aback, disoriented, disconcerted;

[SAC]

NEW IPO PROSPECTUS:
"VortexDotCom"
Chmn: Chairman Meow
CEO: H. Brachen
Tagline: Hot Air Bottled.
Strategy: Sriracha Powered.
Chief Risk: Putin will steal it all, make it a division of Rosneft.

[lc]

I used to have a cat. I would bring it to the vet's. It was a nasty, nasty cat. It liked me. One time I saw the vet's notes on said cat. The vet's notes were as follows" "WATCH THIS CAT".

do. not. feed. the. fucking. cat.

hopelessly,

lc

[SonomaSox]

Cold? Not so much. Another sunny, 75 degree day. Of course, I haven't seen water in about a year. No water = no making beer, wine, or booze soon. We're thinking about tapping into Oregon's aquifer.

[urm t m in J]

Do not feed the trolls.
Do NOT feed the fucking cat.
Stop feeding the prancing butler.
Re the strip: Nature magazine sez we are doomed. We probably are. Why is doom so funny? It is funny.....but why?

[h.b.]

Pedantic is fine. Bemused has been edited.

Re climate change the "joke" of the strip isn't whether or not it's happening, but rather that Russia, and China as well, couldn't give a shit. They don't give a shit about diversity or any of the other umpteen supposed "crisis" we suffer from either.

[Harwich Rich]

Greenhouse gases?? Blame it on the Melbourne cabbage!!

[h.b.]

Latest crisis: football is too violent.

Putin smiles. And waits.

[soxdownunder]

Whatever happened to the hot girls of curling? (And it's okay Bob - i don't mind the odd lawyer's joke.)

[yazbread]

A few of my students were talking about the Tanaka signing before class. We argued about the relative lack of success of Japanese pitchers in MLB over the years. I proceeded to introduce them to the real strength of Japanese baseball - keg girls. They found that part of the game fascinating.

[SonomaSox]

Grady Sizemore, huh? More a twig than a log on the hot stove...Hope he can grow a beard.

[Rob in CT]

Love the word "bumptious". Love the show.

Hate cats... But to be fair, they hate me, too.