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Your omniscient author in absentia:
UPDATE: Tuesday, 9/25

(staying in hotel)


(routine disrupted)


(general apathy towards the Red Sox that began a year ago September)


I got nothing today.


Your omniscient author in absentia:
Sorry for the late notice on this...

We are having some restoration work done to Chateau Brachen which entails moving out for the week and taking up residence in a hotel.

I'd thought I could spit out a strip this morning, but, alas, I'm running behind trying to get everything in order before the contractors arrive.

I should be able to get into a normal schedule tomorrow.



There are lots of things that we need to fix, all too often at great expense.
An example.Alfredo Aceves is as good as gone. But, his replacement will cost more, and may not perform at the same level Aceves very occasionally flashes.
hb, Natalie offer shelter in her bus to nowhere?

Ha. I get it! It's a metaphor for the NFL referees. Their "house" is being "renovated" so they have to "live at a hotel" while the "contractors" hand out first downs like candy on Halloween.

I've never heard the words "contractors" and "one week" used together before.

Alright, my curiosity is piqued. What size job entails moving out of the house for an entire week?

Will you be selling bricks?

Bob, I thought the same thing. Make me think of this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qLcjUmBncZ8

h.b., I hope you're just getting carpet removed. Maybe Mrs. h.b. can get the carpet removed, too...

Ha! Reminds me of an experience my neighbors had during renovations to their home to add a second floor to their bungalow several summers ago. Rather than showing the good sense to move to a hotel, they chose to remain in their tarp-covered house, only to be alerted at 6:30 am to two contractors staring down at them "mid-conjugals" through the large hole in their bedroom's cathedral ceiling.

Mrs. Neighbor attempted to race for the bathroom wrapped in a bedsheet only to have it catch on the bedrail. It provided quite a show to the workers. We still chuckle about it when we get together for dinner...

If I recall correctly, hb would not want mrs. hb to have any carpeting removed, but rather install shag. Both are welcome to camp out this week on the Bus to Nowhere, but at this point in the season it's a little worse for the wear: empty bottles strewn about, cigar burns in the upholstery, stains of dubious origin abounding...

Is it a commentary that you didn't update your copyright this year or just oversight?:)

I'm so lazy about copyright. Ugh.

Chateau Brachen is getting a ceiling surface redo, incredibly messy, as well as some other painting. Crew can move a lot faster if nobody is in residence at the time.

And Natalie has a good memory re shag. Though I don't mind hard wood floors at all. It's the male preoccupation with the Nair look that I have a problem with.

Natalie, Ask the White House domestic staff about dubious stain removal. They probably have a ton of experience with them.
Speaking of dubious stains, where's the Aceves release?
Texture Paint is an agent one can get high on, legally, too between the paint and some booze. Cheers!

Contractors for a paint job? You must be in the 1%.

I believe in trickle down theory. I do no work myself if I can help it.

Of course, I'm also lazy and and not especially "handy" when it comes to the skilled trades.

Oh, and also, I live in a place where labor is rather abundant and inexpensive.

So, yeah, Chateau Brachen has a lot of help. It's what affords me the leisure to do a creepy comic blog about men playing a child's game.

Never heard the words "mid-conjugals" and large hole used together before. It's Bob's fault. Coundown to Roberto Veep?

I have just made the mistake of watching the last 10 minutes of the Packers/Seahawks game. In a nutshell:


I'm on a company outing today. I think we're outing baseball players.

They are,SDU,they are ;(

Ah, the anger is gone. Fall is in the air, Bill is lighter in the wallet until he gets a bonus from Bob, unless Bob supports the scab refs.
I was a scab once, but it wasn't a life or death, money involved matter. Vegas will end the charade, not the networks, not the refs, but the owners will listen to Vegas. The deal will be made there and I do not need to say the obvious.
Day 2 of the Aceves watch.

I was a scab for a few weeks at my first job out of college. The plants were on strike, and I got sent to Richmond and ran a machine that made Burger King Whopper cartons for a couple of weeks. The company took my salary and converted it to Union scale. I was working 12 X 7, which went 4 hours of time and a half every day, plus 8 hours of double time and 4 hours of triple time on weekends. I made a nice bonus in two weeks. The guys that were there for the whole strike bought houses with the "bonus."

H.B. is eating a $30 hotel omelette right now.


That is funny... It was actually a $15 egg white breakfast sandwich.

Then had to drop dog at vet for his teeth cleaning.

Maybe I am the 1% after all?

No strip today. Sorry. But, you know, it's not like I'm bailing out during pennant race.

Did the dog go to the vet while sitting on top of your car? That's the true 1% test.

No, I didn't put him on the top of the car for fear Obama would see him from one of his killer drones, and then POTUS would get all hungry for some roast dog while dreaming of his father.

Last game ticket tonight.

Doesn't matter, finally saab a win on Sunday. Ninth game in and finally a win.

Oops, sorry abuick the typo.

RIP Andy Williams. Way to go on avoiding the Spider's web.

Ah, to be in possession of a consensus with Baracq Hussein. I, Like W.C. Fields and our inept POTUS, have an aversion for dogs. I would "fly" a drone and ice any dog not properly within a protective box. California already is heating up the idea of forbidding loose dogs in cars and trucks. Yep, like our kids, our dogs will be put in safety capsules for over the road travel. A dog should only travel in the bed of a pickup, no where else. Ask Pedroia where his dog rides, ask Josh Beckett, then offer him a cold one. Then it would be safe to ask him. Damn the nanny state, let kids and dogs ride free of shipping containers.
But, it was the only way I could get Chairman Meow into the car for his trip to the vet, officer. The Chaircat forgave me, but only after a double hit of liva snaps heated in the Mic. Like ballplayers a Cat lives to be spoiled by it's owner.

"Chairman Meow"

Best cat name evah!

The Chairman approves. He reminded me that this is day 3 of the Aceves watch.

cmdrflake, that post feels like a brain teaser. :) But more importantly, I can more handle your dislike of my dear POTUS than your outing yourself as a cat person. Aversion to dogs? Heartbreaking! Say it ain't so!

Sorry, Natalie, it is so. Dogs and I don't go together, like Alfredo Aceves and his pitching coaches, managers and the media.
Dogs drool Cats rule!
Dogs have masters
Cats have staff.
I am on The Chairman's staff.
He is wondering how anyone could abide a dog. No, he wants to go out in the garage, must be a rat in there.

Like dogs, hate dog crap. Hence no dogs. My wife wants a French Bulldog but she is only allowed a dog once I die. Hopefully, she won't try to speed things along.

French Bulldogs are awesome. Knew one in Boston named Kevin, which is simply hilarious. I love dogs named like people.

Charles dog Gaulle?

Today, H.B. is enjoying the $18 hotel fruit tart, the $7 cup of dark roast coffee, and the $5 toast (butter extra).

Dark roast coffee.
Whole grain sourdough toast.
Niman Ranch organic half-cured ham.

So it turns out I cannot live out of hotel and continue to write Soxaholix. Live and learn.

On schedule to move back into Chateau Brachen tomorrow.

One of our two beagles is named Fenway. I'd rename him after this lackluster season, but what is the point. He is getting old and feeble, just like the stadium that he is named after. We also have a horse and a king snake.

I will never own a pet that thinks it is smarter than me. So cats are out.

Just saw this on BDD. Please be true. Pretty Please.


That's a Wrap: Bobby's Going to Be the Fall Guy for 2012

Cherington Appears to Confirm the New Manager Search Is On

Red Sox General Manager Ben Cherington on WEEI's Dennis & Callahan Show: "Well we know what we need to do is hit the ground running this offseason. One of the things that, as I look back on last offseason, that didn't go perfectly was simply the amount of time that we spent on the manager search and what that did to the rest of the offseason and I would like to spend less time on it this offseason for sure."

1-9 at Fenway. 1-10 on the season. Let's go Pats.

Here's something only peripherally Boston sports related: GQ has an awesome oral history of the great sitcom Cheers. Well worth the read: http://www.gq.com/entertainment/movies-and-tv/201210/cheers-oral-history-extended?currentPage=1

Oh, and Captain Thighs is coming back. *Swoon* http://sports.yahoo.com/news/reports-varitek-set-job-red-043031492--mlb.html

OK, Natalie, settle down, have a hit of Old Gran'Dad. He has been given a "Friend of the Team" job, like Mr. Pesky had, a VP/Nothing. He will help out the pitchers and catchers on a part time basis. But, Salty is making progress. He's passed Geddy in my line-up.
It feels so much like 1965.
My Brit Gal Pal (met in college too long ago) had the hots for Captain Thighs, too and wanted him to try playing "Union", we call it rugby. The unis are for boy lovers, like Herbert the pervert on Family Guy, who has a serious crush on Chris. I bet the old guy went to Penn State.
Day 4 of the Aceves watch. It keeps time, but it will hurt you when you try to trust it.

Collingwood update. We lost to Sydney. I am a member of both clubs and fly to Melbourne this afternoon for the grand final v Hawthorn. I will keep you posed.

Liverpool update:


H.B.'s hotel breakfast: $19 eggs benedict, side of $7 cantelope.

It was move out day today so I slummed it with the 47%.

Breakfast: 1 leftover chicken enchilada and an apple.

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