Reserve your sunset rental now

Bill:
Ladies & Gentlemen, Boys & Girls, Welcome to the Terrordome.

 

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Mike:
Seriously. If you missed out in investing in gold, I think now would be a good time to get in on a sunset renting franchise... the forecast suggests business will be brisk.

 

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Bill:
You know as much as we seem to be headed straight on to Epic Fail territorry, there is something positive to make note of...

 

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Bill:
This would be fah fah fah worse if it were occuring pre-2004.

 

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Mike:
Absolutely. I mean if this had happened before we'd evah stepped foot in the land of milk and honey, well, can you say "apoplectic."

 

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Bill:
Yeah, in the dakh days before the Holy Epic of the Bloody Sock and the Merry Band of Idiots I'd be planning an outing to Revere Beach to pull a Virginia Woolf.

 

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Mike:
Revere Beach, huh?

 

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Bill:
Yeah, you know, it's close, convenient, on the T...

 

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Mike:
Maybe grab a Kelly's roast beef and fries for your last suppah?

 

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Bill:
Exactly, go out in style, not to mention fully weighted, and all.

 

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Comments

[yazbread]

In Revere Beach, they probably think the Germans did bomb Pearl Harbor.

[Harwich Rich]

But back then we would have expected it.

[soxinsix]

It still sucks. This team played so well for so long, and to fade down the stretchthe way they are really blows.

[Natalie]

God, it's as if you're reading my mind, hb. Was having this exact convo yesterday. Am trying to dredge up some good old fashioned Sox fan hysteria over this late season collapse, and instead all I've got is a vague feeling of indigestion. Bring on football season. Now, I never got completely into the Pats, and since I'm gonna be in the NYC area for life, is it worth finding an NY/NJ team to root for? If so, which one? I will take recommendations.

[Kaz]

If you root for the Jets, Natalie, you're dead to me.

[Kaz]

If you root for the Giants, Natalie, you're dead to me.

[Natalie]

Shit, I guess that leaves... the Giants? (I refuse to root for the Eagles- my little bro's a fan, and I enjoy hating the teams he loves (he's a Yanks fan)). Hmph. Maybe I stick with the Pats, although fucking FiOS does not have the NFL package.

[Natalie]

Clearly Kaz is not reasonable on this matter. Jets and Giants still in play.

[LarryE]

This absolutely would have been harder to take pre-2004.

We're still 3 up on the Rays and the Rays have 7 games remaining with the Yankees, four in NY. The Angels, however, are only one game in back of the Rays for the Wild Card, so we need to be wary of them as well. I still think we'll get into the playoffs but it's questionable as to how deep we'd go.

[Kaz]

The Jets are evil. I shouldn't have to explain that.

The Giants are QB'd by a Manning and destroyed the Pats undefeated season in the Super Bowl with that bullshit helmet-to-hand catch. Also, evil.

I'm very reasonable on this. Find your local Pats watering hole and watch the Pats. The Ravens are also a good team.

[Bob]

Natalie, if the Pats are out of the question for you (I don't understand why they would be, but whatever), then choose a down-and-out team that looks like they might be on the upswing. Detroit comes to mind. Then in a few years when they're good, you'll appear all-knowing and powerful.

I agree with Kaz; you can't root for the Jets or Giants. You just can't. It'd be like being in the porn business. Sleezy and itch-inducing. But if you absolutely must root for one, I suppose the Giants are the lesser of two evils.

Now about those Sox. My crystal ball tells me that if Beckett wins tonight, we go to the playoffs. If he loses, we don't.

[Kev]

I'd be more worried if this epic fail was happening with the likes of Beckett, Bucholz and Bedard making the starts.

[Welkah]

Nat, go Bills. You've got a real chance to get in on the ground floor... they've got everything the Sox had in 1994, 1995... history of heartbreak, greedy, foolish ownership, a deteriorating piece of shit stadium... but a bad climate for sundresses.

[h.b.]

I hate the Jets. I hate that motherfucking bald fire hate wearing fan cheerleader. I hate the J-E-T-S cheer even more than Clap.Clap ClapClapClap.

With that said, better rooting for the Jets than the Eagles. Rooting for the Eagles is the lowest form of sports fan existence in the mofo universe.

[Steve in MD]

They are who we thougth they were... back in April.

[Steve in MD]

Nat, just look at what the Jets' sleaze did to my beloved Brett Favre. Stay Away!

[Scott]

Laughing out loud here at the football comments. My family has season tickets to the Pats. My Sundays for 5-months revolve around the Pats for better or worse. TFB is the greatest QB of our time. We don't get many chances to watch such an athlete in his prime. I would tune in this Sunday at 4:15.

Beckett and Lester still to pitch against the Devil Rays. No need to panic yet...

[HunterStars]

Damn it, h.b. now that you've put the thought in my head I need to drive to Kelly's a get a sandwich!

[da kine]

For anyone else who is getting depressed and/or antsy, do what I did a few days ago and go back and read the October 2004 Soxaholix strips in the archive. They cheered me up something fierce, even if only for a little while.

[louclinton]

step away friends, from precipice. I shall make my triumphant return to the House That Beer Built this evening to witness the epic turnaround begin.

Also, working on some sunsets, just for safety.

lc

[meredith]

So, so true. I find myself thinking "how nice of the Sox to ensure I won't have anything to focus on back home while I'm on vacation in Ireland in October. Go Pats."

Natalie, if you're going to choose between either of the NY teams (but really ... why??), go Giants. Yes they have a Manning as a QB and there was that whole Super Bowl thing, but they have New England roots (their first few seasons were played in the Yale Bowl here in New Haven) and their fans are generally nowhere near as annoying as fans of the Yutz, as we refer to them in our household. Just whatever you do, for the love of god don't start following the Steelers. (For some reason there are more Steelers fans in Connecticut than fans of any other team, and it boggles my mind.)

[louclinton]

You're welcome

[Natalie]

Thanks for all the advice, guys. I think I am gonna stick with the Pats. The idea was not to find a new team just for shits and giggles, but more to take advantage of living in the NYC area to have one sports team that I root for in the vicinity (for live games, media coverage, general fandom). However, it sounds as though the Jets are a complete non-starter (as Philly always was), and it may be just as fun to keep my New England allegiance fully intact.

[Lauren]

This ball club just likes drama. This is just the season ending arch before the big finish. It's always okay in the end. Right? Right? Crap. I think I am watching the wrong television shows. Stupid Curt Young.

[yazbread]

I just cast a spell for five straight wins. Rob?

[SAC]

Used to live in NY/NJ.

Went to Giants games.
Fans=Geezers;YA Tittle?; flasks w/sherry

Tried Jets.
=30yr old yahoos from LG'island; wazzit2u?; bud

Fell in love with NJ Generals!
=Young punkers & ex-cons; crazies dangle security guards from upper deck; coke galore

USFL folded; came to Boston for a girl and Tony Eason; on metamucil ever since.

[Rob in CT]

Intertwining my spells with yours, Yaz. We'll pull them through to the promised land. :)

Surprised no one has brought up the conspiracy theory of the Yanks tanking the games vs. the Rays just to fuck with us. Not bloody likely, but that was the convo in the Starbucks line here in San Antonio this morning. Was good for a chuckle, anyway.

[ponch]

Win tonight, win tomorrow, take deep sighs of relief. So I command.

[cmdrflake]

I had a thing for the Jets, but it was an AFL thing. If you saw Frank Malzone play second and Yaz in shallow left you'll know. Pre-1970 the Pats were largely ignored. They were the Patsies in Mudville a long time ago. Now look; The Bills suck until they move to London, LA or Toronto. Some things change. The Sox doing a house of cards in September is not a novelty. It is normal, we hate it, but this is normal. YUCCHHH!

[Bob]

Pats game Sunday (the start of my 20th season as a season ticket holder), Red Sox game Monday. I'm going to be a tired boy on Tuesday.

Okay, I'm going to try this again (I know, I know, the definition of insanity and all that):

Have a great weekend all. Hopefully we'll have something fun to yak about on Monday.

[soxdownunder]

Nat,
Pack!
Jack:
https://picasaweb.google.com/114892006575203579224/BruinsFanWithCup#5653086976866212770

Season turns back around tonighs. With apologies to Lou:
https://picasaweb.google.com/114892006575203579224/BrokenHill#5445301538219055810

[Harwich Rich]

Beauty Peter,but I'd settle for an Opal or two ;D

[louclinton]

I enjoyed my trip too the pahk last night. Classic RS game, for the ages. Epic turnaround begins......

now

More later, lc

[pseudosanity78]

Bob,
For some reason when I read your comment about your crystal ball I read crystal METH ball.
Which, y'know after the last couple of weeks didn't sound too off base. We can all use a pick me up sometimes, amirite?
And Natalie, instead of cheering for a pro team, how about you just cheer for your alma mater? I find that with my limited football knowledge that it automatically gets me out of uncomfortable conversations when I say I just root for EatPoo U.

[soxdownunder]

Does Harvard have a football team? Lacrosse perhaps? Polo?

[pseudosanity78]

Yeah sdu, Harvard has a football team. But the Ivy's don't offer athletic scholarships (at leat they didn't when I was applying to uni) so I would think that would hinder them in competing with the 'big boys' of college ball in terms of attracting talent. Not to say they don't field a good team, they're just not a school that springs to mind when you think of football.

[Harwich Rich]

Just ask Mike Lynch ;O

[soxdownunder]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And Kenneth O'Donnell and the Kennedys. What can I say, I am an ignorant Australian (if you'll forgive the redundancy).

[Natalie]

My sophomore year Harvard lost every single game of its season except the Yale game, and we considered that a rousing success. Although one guy (that my college roommate deflowered!) a year below me did go to the NFL.

Hey, the Sox really suck now, huh? This is fun!