It's the humidity

Doug:
OK. I've just got to say it — this fucking team bores me.

 

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Mike:
It's reached the miserable point where even when they win a game it's not so much that they had any say in the mattah but rathah a case of the opponent just not winning that particulah day.

 

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Al:
Sitting through 9 innings is a form "enhanced interrogation."

 

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Mike:
Seriously. The Dice-K syndrome has metastasized — Watching the whole thing is now like watching grass grow with paint drying on it.

 

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Doug:
No worse. Watching these guys is like watching a tree sloth watching grass grow with paint drying on it.

 

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Al:
Fuck that. Watching these guys is like watching a rerun of watching a tree sloth watching grass grow with paint drying on it.

 

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Al:
In high def.

 

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Doug:
There's not gonna be any trade before the deadline is there?

 

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Al:
No. There's not going to be any trade, there's not going to be any health care reform, there's not going to be any eco-fucking-nomic recovery.

 

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Al:
We've been deceived.

 

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Doug:
Time to grease up your no-no holes fellas. Cuz we're getting screwed.

 

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Mike:
Undah a rented sunset.

 

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Comments

[soxdownunder]

Shit, eh! And me about to get on a 'plane. I'm depressed. Because I do not hope.

[pseudosanity78]

If you can't see the sunset because you live under a black cloud that rains hot garbage, does it actually exist?

[louclinton]

As">http://lcssunsetemporium.blogspot.com">As Always, You're Welcome

[louclinton]

I don't know what happened to the link and don't care.

Summary: its a dump at sunset, bitches.

lc

[Harwich Rich]

"These are the times that try men's souls" and all that.

[louclinton]

Meh

[Bob]

The brilliant Abby (and yes, I have to call her brilliant even though she's a cretin because she went to "Paaaark" and "Beaver"), was giving names to the players last night, in order of batting.

"Oil, egg, vinegar" to start the first inning, followed by "lemon juice, salt and Dijon."

"What the hell are you talking about, you crazy loon?"

"It's mayonnaise; this whole team is mayonaise."

Just Abby being Abby. Speaking of which, did you see Manny's catch last night. Typical. He quit on the ball, then realized, hey, maybe I can catch this. And did, to tremendous roars from the fans at Dodger Stadium who don't minbd steroids because their faces are too stabbed with botox to react.

[daubie]

h.b. - you hit the nail on the head once again.

lc - brilliant.

[Bob]

BTW, just noticed H.B.'s "It's The Humidity" headline.

Jesus Allah Wicken Priestess Christ it's been nasty. An Indian sweat lodge.

Last night, I saw my spirit guide.

(It wasn't Brad Penny.)

[louclinton]

it's not the heat, it's the turgidity

[h.b.]

Everyone is cracking me up this morning.

[Matt of CT]

I'm headed to Fenway Mid-Atlantic this weekend. Looking forward to Smoltz give up another 5 runs in 4 2/3 innings on Friday. Anyone been to Camden Yards and have any suggestions (and can I get some sriracha on a crabcake from a vendor?)

[Bob]

If L.C. is turgid, he's going to crack somebody up.

(Veal, try it, all week, etc.)

[Bob]

Matt, just squirt some Sriracha into the ball sack of your underwear. Always works for me when the sausage vendors don't have Sriracha, or it's been stolen from their cat/table.

Still hot and tasty, but it does have more of a gamey flavor.

[Harwich Rich]

Fluffer's surprise,Bob???

[Natalie]

Was just thinking that our boys (playing with fear and ignorance, not the appropriate fear and arrogance) need a rainout. Looks like Crash Davis may have come through.


So fun to come to the States, finally have live Sox ball to watch and have it be this...this...this...ugh, no words.

[Scott]

There's still a wildcard this season right???

[Billy Mahty]

Well done lc, didn't know you had it in you.

[Billy Mahty]

Man these guys are flakey.. in just two weeks: http://www.soxaholix.com/tp/2009/07/visionary-experience.html

[yazbread]

The gods usually punish the sin of hubris.

[louclinton]

It's not the hubris, it's the cupidity

[Bob]

Billy, the Sox just traded for Clinton Ebb and Tyler Flow.

[louclinton]

I love Ebb n'Flo, oh no that was Flo and Eddie, no that was The Turtles, no that was The Rascals or Rascal Flats or Earl Flatt of Steveie Earl or Nicjs or Nick Cannon or Billy Cannon or Billy Bob Thornton, no, Bob Marley

aw crap

[Jeff in NC]

July 2009 - a month to remember to forget. Sharks attacks anyone?

[Kaz]

Matt, try some of Boog's barbecue out on the Eutaw St pavilion behind the bleacher seats.

Otherwise, there are some great places inside of the nearby Harborplace pavilions (mixed in among a bunch of crappy tourist food spots). I don't know who the current tenant list is, but you should be able to pick out the good stuff from the bad.

Otherwise, if you're near the airport, tell the taxi driver to take you to G&M's in Linthicum (near the corner of Nursery Rd and Hammonds Ferry Rd). Best crabcake sandwich between the airport and the ballpark.

Please don't ruin it with sriracha.

[Kaz]

So, I hear that Mystique and Aura are dancing again, if you get there before 11:30 PM on a school night...

[Jeff in NC]

Matt - Camden Yards (Fenway South), great place. Don't sit in the wrong seat or you'll incure the wrath of the usher. Parking - if you can get a pass for one of the closer lots (A or B I think) it's worth it - the other lots are a bit of a hike.

Food - Crabcakes anywhere. Eutaw Street has it all. Sriracha not invented there yet.

[Steve in MD]

Breaking News from the NYT: David Ortiz and Manny Ramirez were both on the 2003 "tested positive for sterods" list "according to lawyers with knowledge of the results". My day is totally ruined.

[Devine]

For what it's worth, the middle of the '04 and '07 seasons were also rather underwhelming. But I dunno, I'm feeling like without a 3rd at-least-decent starter, it's a no-go this year.

Will Wakefield save us?

*weeps*

[louclinton]

"Ortiz and Ramirez Said to Be on 2003 Doping List "

That hurts more than taking a claw hammer in the no-no

[sonomasox]

fuck the NYT...they're so unbiased they just had to throw manny and papi front and center.

July is torture not even a pole swingin' prom queen can save it.

[sonomasox]

besides David Eckstein, who the fuck wasn't doping.

[Steve in MD]

Um, Sanomasox, I believe the NYT one of the owners of the Red Sox.

[Steve in MD]

Jeesh.

[Steve in MD]

Okay, now that is just weird. What I typed was: NYT "is" one of the owners

[h.b.]

I always figured Papi would be on the list. But I figure most players are on something. So doesn't phase me personally too much.

Meanwhile, I'll be traveling tomorrow, so no strip. I'll post a holding strip though for comments.

[Natalie]

All my Yanks fan friends (and little brother) are out in full force on Facebook over this Ortiz doping thing. On the one hand, I have a sort of c'est la vie approach to steriods (and assume everyone was doing something). On the other hand, it's just so damn disappointing since now everyone who wants to take away the validity of '04 has more firepower. Sucky sucky day.

[sonomasox]

Steve - yeah, but that still doesn't make them evil and me friggin miserable.

I'm w/ you HB (see Eckstein statement) but the crap-tastic ball over the last month makes it sting a bit more.

[Devine]

Eh, every championship in just about every sport is "tainted".

[HunterStars]

As I remember, Ortiz complained years ago that the steroids policy was hard for the non-English speaking players to understand. Word seem odd in a different light. As h.b. said- who WASN'T juicing!

[Kaz]

2004 Sox Players who I don't think juiced:

Mark Bellhorn.
Doug Mirabelli.
Pokey Reese.
Bill Mueller.
Dave Roberts.

2004 Sox Players who I don't think juiced, but should have:
Orlando Cabrera.
Kevin Millar.
Pedro Astacio.

[Bob]

//Please don't ruin it with sriracha.//

Oh Kaz, why? Why???

I thought I knew ya.

Regarding Manny and Ortix) and Skank fans ripping them, perhaps they need to be reminded that:

A) The Skankees are the most performance-enhancing-drug-riddled team of our age, and,

B) 2003 is not 2004 or 2007.

I might also add that the national dish of the DR is andro-spiced chicken.

[Kaz]

Bob, you don't screw with my crabmeat. Just don't.

An italian sausage or half a billion other plain foods use...nay, need sriracha. Crabcakes, the likes of which are produced by G&M, don't. Sriracha has a place and time and crabcakes are neither.

[Nolasox]

Bob, do you prefer Boudin or Andouille? Of course travelling with either in my carry-on bag will be interesting when scanned and I'll have to figure out how to keep them cold cause I sure don't want to cause you any intestinal strife so I might get you something less perishable.

[Nolasox]

And you can put sriracha on them if you want. I've always said that it is a good thing the don't have lobsters in Louisiana cause they'd cook them in crab boil. They'll season the hell out of anything down here.

[Steve in MD]

The first time I got a boiled lobster down here in MD it came with Old Bay seasoning. Yuck. It's great on steamed crabs though.

[sonomasox]

can we get nomar back...he seems to be hitting better than our 1-9 and he's already tainted so big whoop

[Bob]

Nola, I have Andouille all the time, so I'd go with the Boudin. Love them both though.

[vasoxfan]

red sox suck. This is a sucky sucky day.

[Kaz]

Trading deadline is closing in, so here's my proposal. I hope Theo is reading this:

Buchholz goes to Oakland, they send us their hitting coach.

Look, it's a fair trade. If they ask for more, maybe we can throw in Westmoreland or something.

[Nolasox]

lc, have you been purchasing ads on the Globe's "Extra Bases" page, cause they've got a sunset over Fenway?

More like Agony On Demand, Comcast.

[soxdownunder]

Yikes. I think I'll unpack my Viva El Papi T.
Saddownunder.

[Nolasox]

SDU, I was gonna wear mine on the plane - now I'm not so sure. However, he did hit a 3 run HR today.

[louclinton]

sox win 8-5

had em all the way

[Devine]

A go-ahead blast with 2 down in the 7th. Heh. I do enjoy that some of the MFY fans will be frothing.

[Jeff in NC]

If I'm being true to my own bullshit about guys like Giambi, do I have an issue with Papi? oy.

Say it ain't so Papi! Just say it. I'll believe ya! Just tell me you didn't know you ate the wrong pill. I'll believe ya!

Is August coming? soon? I wasn't ready to go back to old timey Redsox angst in quite this head on collision sort of way.

[soxdownunder]

I recall Papi saying they could test him and all they would find is rice. But the three run go ahead jack has me in a packing quandary. I have two hours to decide.

[Matt of CT]

And Ortiz gives a big ol' Eff You to the PED reports.

[Jeff in NC]

Just saw this - well said...

//Tom Tango at The Book Blog: Redsox Nation will defend him, the others who want to fight will villify him, and even those Redsox fans who are bothered by it will simply hold their noses as they cling to the dream of a clean ring. The rest of us who don't cling to the idea that baseball is a virgin to be protected at all costs will shake our heads for a second and move on in peace, while leaving the battlefield to those too holy for us. //

Wink, I'll take the holding my nose option for the diagonal win.

[sonomasox]

//I will not hide and I will not make excuses//

You killed my reputation, prepare to die.