The Daisuke Conundrum

Al:
Oh, Timmah, you've done it again.

 

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Mike:
If once again Wakes doesn't get selected to the All Stah game it'll be a travesty.

 

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Doug:
Abso-friggin-lutely. If Wakefield isn't on the All Stah rostah I'll boycott the game because it'll be a situation worse than Hitlah.

 

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Al:
So are you ready for the 6 man rotation?

 

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Doug:
Smooooooltz!

 

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Mike:
Interesting that Dice-K is getting bumped. Didn't see that one coming. Heh.

 

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Al:
If Smoltz has a good outing this could get intriguing.

 

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Doug:
Don't forget, too, the kid we know in Pawtucket, yelling promote me now or suck it.

 

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Mike:
The Daisuke Conundrum.

 

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Al:
Maybe he'll get disappeared to the DL?

 

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Doug:
Yeah, he goes away and we nevah hear from him again until years latah when he's found living in a cave on a Pacific atoll.

 

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Mike:
We kid we because we love.

 

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Doug:
Yin and Yang.

 

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Al:
Seriously. My love for Dice-K is the sound of paint drying on growing grass.

 

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Comments

[Bob]

Man, Timmy's knuckler was crazy last night. During the first inning, I was thinking that it was either going to be a really good game for him, or one of those 8-walk affairs.

Smoltz on Thursday in D.C. Exit polls have him winning, but the absentee ballot (a suddenly hot DH Papi) may sway the outcome.

[Jeff in NC]

So here's the thing with DicK v. Papi. Papi earned the support RSN is giving him while he is trying not to suck. DicK hasn't really earned that support yet, or had the chance to earn it for that matter.

So with DicK I'm ready to rent the sunset.

With Papi starting to get rid of his suckitude... Give me a raincheck on that sunset, bitches.

glad I don't have to worry about the Far East marketing issues - I can just say SHITCAN THE MOFO.

BTW, I am the man from nantucket. (I have a T shirt that says so)

[Ryan with a capital "R"]

Timmy doesn't deserve just a spot on the All-Star roster but some potato salad, too.

[buckner was framed]

Dice K conundrum = Kobayashi maru

[dhr]

Am I just bad at the internet, or was Smoltz originally supposed to pitch AAA on thursday? I guess don't buy pawsox tickets on speculation. Now trying to decide whether to go 2 nights in a row.

[yazbread]

Wake was ably assisted by a very impatient group of hitters last night. Several Marlins swung at pitches and then immediately had a look on their face of 'I can't believe I jumped at that pitch'. As to the Dice-K conundrum, he should save face and ritually disembowel himself on the pitching mound. It would free up the roster and probably nullify his contract.

[Jeff in NC]

Yaz - agreed. Knuckler facing guys who don't see it ever is a major advantage.

Also, long live memories of Mirabelli and other attempts to replace, but Kottaras is the shit. Pushing the foul ball fair, then picking it up and tagging the hitter before he gets out of the box, then laughing about it with Tito in the dugout. Good stuff there.

[sonomasox]

with all true love and adoration, LC - I hope your rent-a-sunset business continues to do poorly. Hopefully you'll be looking for a bailout soon.

Dice needed more time off...shut him down for a month and bring him back fresh for the stretch run.

[Kaz]

I think more than any hitter having problems, pitchers are extremely prone to trying to overdo it when they're having trouble locating pitches and getting strikes across without getting tagged for a hit. That's what we're getting from Dice-K. I think he needs to take a breather and step away from major league situations for a short time. He should be further along than your average MLB rookie because of his age and experience in Japan, but he looks as baffled as to how he's screwing up as Buchholz did last year after having a stellar first season in 2007.

Send Dice-K down to get his head straightened out and bring up Buchholz in the meantime. Which ever one is less impressive is gone by trading deadline. Both will be great 2-3 spot pitchers for the next few years regardless of past problems with Buchholz and current problems with Dice K. May the one who leaves just have success on a team we don't have to play in the playoffs.

[Rob in CT]

Jeff - agree about how frustrating Mothra can be with the 123,847,612,340,876 pitch counts over 5-1/3rd per game, the WBC, the translated interviews and all the other hogswallow. But let's not lose sight of the fact the guy won 18 friggin' games for us last year.

Does he have the leeway in fans' hearts and minds that Papi does? Of course not, but he's done pretty well by RSN overall. I'm not ready to rent that Nantucket sunset just quite yet.

(I am glad, though, that I don't have to make Theo's decision on this...)

Finally, referencing my last post on yesterday's (this morning's?) strip: H.B., you and the Mrs. need go light up that Auerbach victory stogie now. So pleased to hear she's doing well.

[Matt of CT]

found this gem on the BBC today One evil empire supporting another

[yazbread]

Two comments heard on the radio recently.

Bruce Levine on ESPN 1000 in Chicago on giving a new nickname to Yankee Stadium - 'The House That Juice Built'.

A disgruntled RSN fan on XM's Baseball This Morning calling Dice-K 'Dontrelle Matsuzaka'.

[Jeff in NC]

Rob - agreed about the 18 games and wish he could get back to that particular type of fucked up pitching as opposed to the current variety. I'm not quite ready to sign for the sunset either, but I'm on my way to the rental agency and am going to arrive at lc's door in only a few moments. and he's going to have a nice bitchy sunet waiting there for me.

[louclinton]

1. I'm at home, taking orders.
2. I'm happy to be wrong, which happens now and again.
3. Ahadinejad thinks Yankee Stadium should be renamed The House That Jews Built.
4. I got yer sunsets right here.

lc

[sonomasox]

nice, LC

glad HB doesn't work on my schedule...it'd be noon for you east coasters everyday. missed that whole shitstorm earlier this morning. you guys should stick w/ the purple skunk than the meth.

Glad to hear about Ms. HB - continued health to the "Brachen" family.

[vancouversoxfan]

h.b., loved the pacific atoll reference!

[NolaSox]

Jeff, I'm guessing you intentionally left out the e in DiceK.

[soxdownunder]

I slept through the drama and angst waiting for todays stip. If hb worked to my schedule Sonoma it would be tomorrow every day which can be quite disconcerting, trust me. Very glad to hear mrs hb is well.

As for Dice-K, without that deal we wouldn't have got the haiku inspiring one who looks to the earth as he throws th ball past befuddled hitters. I'd whack Matsuzaka on the DL for a time and bring him back a little later in the v. v. long season. His stuff is too good to trade away or write off. Clay can go fish.

[NolaSox]

I'm just waiting for a player with Gamera for a nickname. Saito's, according to wikipedia, is the Mole.

[Bob]

We could call hom Mole-zilla.

[Jeff in NC]

Nola - that would be a correct guess.

I'll continue to be something of an ass about DicK's performance and status until he gives me a reason to be otherwise. I was also a "get rid of this Pedroia kid" guy too. Am now very content to have been wrong and not atually able to make roster decisions.

[louclinton]

looking at the sunset right now from Chez Clinton. Not bad. Wish you were here.

[Paul]

Well, one solution might be to slip a female fertility drug in Dice-K's sake... That would give him 50 days off, and let the Sox save the salary too.