Sailing

Al:
I want to give praise to Timmah but what can I say that hasn't already been said about the guy over the 100 years he's been with the team?

 

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Mike:
I think his line can do the talking: 8.0 5 1 1 2 3 1.

 

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Doug:
Can you believe his Fenway ERA his now 1.71?

 

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Al:
Wakes loves him some home cooking.

 

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Doug:
Unfortunately, the same cannot be said regarding David Oh-fer-tiz.

 

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Mike:
Damn, I know, it's getting worse not bettah.

 

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Al:
People are saying that even during BP he can't put one any furthah than the warning track.

 

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Doug:
I think we are rapidly approaching that time when all good things must come to an end.

 

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Mike:
Down dropt the breeze, the sails dropt down, 'Twas sad as sad could be …*

 

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Doug:
And let's say Theo goes out and gets a replacah. Then what?

 

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Doug:
Hahtlessly release him? Make him a phantom DL? Take a rostah hit as he sits on the bench the rest of the season?

 

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Mike:
Ovahhead the albatross hangs motionless upon the air …*

 

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Comments

[Harwich Rich]

"Nevermore"...oops,wrtong poem.

[Colin]

Good Ancient Mariner reference h.b.

Poor Papi. My dad tells me the Hartford Courant's sports section has him in the headline as "Big Floppy." A little crude but sadly it's starting to manifest itself into reality. They should make Drew the DH (who was en fuego last year) and have Rocco/Kotsay do outfield. Honestly, Papi needs a serious break or some serious surgery if that man is hurtin'.

[Harwich Rich]

...and wrong bird ;D

[Bob]

I will never, ever abadon Papi. For God's sake, he's PAPI. How do you think he feels?

Alone, alone, all, all alone,
Alone on a wide wide sea!
And never a saint took pity on
My soul in agony.

[Natalie]

Another thing Timmah has going for him? He's hot! And yet where was he on Fox Sports list of hottest MLB players?
http://msn.foxsports.com/mlb/pgStory?contentId=9562838&gt1=39002
Bronson Arroyo's inclusion had me laughing aloud. Seriously? Dude was like Gumby with dreadlocks while on the Sox.
Also, a little belatedly, want to give a BIG kudos to Jason O yesterday for passing off a dig at Ortiz so sneakily that no one caught it. His comment about "fearing" that Big Papi would recover to have a season akin to the one Giambi did after giving up the juice masquerades as a compliment an analogy in which Ortiz implied an ex-juicer. Well done. :)

[Scott]

2 Runs?! Only 2 runs?! When is Theo going to get some hitters on this team?! The Skanks just got A-Rod back and have Texira heating up. Enough with waiting till Papi "recovers" his mojo. Get Rocco into this lineup ASAP for now and start some trade talks.

[Bob]

Scott, they just beat the team with the best record in baseball.

When two runs is one run better than the other team, I'm fine with it.

[Go Sox. Go Heels. Yankees suck. Dook sucks.]

Water, water everywhere,
Let's all have a drink.

-Homer Simpson

[fernsco]

I hate to see Theo even consider trading our talented youth. We need to battle this year to the end and then hit the free agency market in the off seaason. Any team trying to trade with the Sox will go hard after Buchholz, Masterson or Bard and we'll end up with a "rental player". The other teams know they have us over a barrel....and I hate to see another "Gagne-reaction" trade.

[soxoshanka]

Besides Timmah, how great was Pap last night. Was that his first clean save all season?

I can't abandon Papi either, although it hurts to watch him.

He went like one that hath been stunned,
And is of sense forlorn

[paddy24]

Why can't you guys "abandon" Papi? If "abandoning" means actually asking him to hit 7th or go for rehab/instruction/conditioningin Florida, then I'm all fo "abandoning" him. The problem is that he's a prima donna who apparently must hit 3rd. Why else would Tito be walking on egg shells? He has to crawl before he can walk. That means getting his act together first, then being the go-to 3rd hitter later. They're doing things ass-backwards right now. You don't hit 3rd when you suck ass. Our season is going down the drain because one player can't face the facts. He's cost us a minimum of five wins. I don't like how he blamed his troubles on Manny no longer hitting behind him, while Youk was hammering the ball. That's weak, especially when it's obvious he's a prime candidate for becoming our next steroids poster child.

[paddy24]

Why can't you guys "abandon" Papi? If "abandoning" him means actually asking him to hit 7th or go to Florida for instruction/conditioning/rehab, then I'm afraid I have to "abandon" him. The problem is, he's a prima donna that apparently is fixated on hitting 3rd, causing Tito to walk on eggshells. He needs to learn to crawl before he can walk. Blaming his troubles on Manny not being around (while Youk and Bay are absolutely smashing the ball the whole time) is really pretty damn weak, if you ask me. Do any of you seriously believe we don't have our next steroids poster child on our hands here? He's already cost us at least five games. The whole team is going to continue to suffer until this washed up player swallows his pride. His attitude stinks. He doesn't play the field. He's slow. He hasn't homered in well over 100 plate appearances. Why does our whole season have to go down the toilet for one player? Is this the first player in MLB history to become washed up? Please move along so I can get back to enjoying my season, Papi. Oh yeah, thanks for 2004 and 2007. But now it's 2009. I move forwards. I don't look backwards.

[sonomasox]

since I have no good poems at the ready and the Papi talk is to painful...I bring you this:

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/05/20/dining/20united.html?_r=1

The Sriracha story.

[vermonter]

Like Bob, I think that Papi deserves every chance that he can be afforded. He IS Papi. The amount of excitement and wins he has given us all is immeasureable.

But also, angry and bitter though it may be, Paddy is right...something needs to change quick.

[Kev]

I'd been wondering if he's been hitting any homers in bp...

I guess my thought that they should send him down to Pawtucket to get just one HR wouldn't work.

[Bob]

Good find, sonoma. Although I find it bizarre that it tooks the NY Times this long to doscoer the joys of Sriracha.

My favorite quote, from a Mrs. lam trying to explain its popularity:

"I guess it goes with alcohol."

Oh, it does, Mrs. Lam. It does.

[Kaz]

Two thoughts on today's comments so far:

#1) "Our season is going down the drain because one player can't face the facts." --Paddy24

Our season so far would qualify us as #1 in half of the divisions out there and we have more offensive production than about 85% of the other teams in baseball right now. You're off your rocker if you think this season is sinking. Papi may be having issues, but this team is doing well despite it.

#2) Secondly, about Papelbon's save last night. To the hitters, that was like trying to hit a bb pellet after dodging gigantic bounding boulders all game. He didn't have to do anything crazy, just pitch and they'd get out just for lack of seeing a pitch over 80 mph for the past two and a half hours.

[Soulie]

Really, Paddy, if this is "going down the drain" then you are officially a spooiled post-2004 brat. It's freaking May. We're in fine position. We have bats coming off the DL, and a starting pitching staff still getting it's legs under it.

And it's very easy why everyone gives Papi the benefit of the doubt. We are fans, are we are people. And we remember the joy that Ortiz gave us. We hare not heartless robots, making decisions on numbers alone. We love the big guy. And in May, if that costs us a game or two, so be it. Because when David gets going again(and I believe at least for part of this yea, he will) it will be that much sweeter to revel in.

[stratomaticboy]

Love the Floyd reference HB! "Echoses" from Pompeii was my theme song to Saturn back in the day!

[COD]

The Floyd reference is nice, but it doesn't change the fact that I've got freaking Christopher Cross stuck in my head from the title.

Thanks HB.

[SSA]

Paddy, you're the type of fan that makes me wish you rooted for another team. Calm down.

Moving Ortiz down in the order accomplishes nothing. Batting orders are statistically insignificant. Calling Papi a "prima donna" is asinine.

[paddy24]

First, sorry for the double post! Second, Soulie, you are crazy if you think Papi will ever even be a .230 hitter, let alone hit any home runs. His career is over. And Kaz, yes, the season is tanking, because we need home field advantage. The reason we failed to make the World Series last year, was because we allowed Tampa Bay to have home field advantage. Two players were responsible for that. Buchholz and Lugo. Had Lowrie come up to the Bigs about two months sooner, the divison would have been ours, and we'd have had home field advantage. This is a 100 win team, easily. Management is quickly turning it into a 90-92 win team. We need Adrian Gonzalez. We can give up Buchholz and Reddeck or Anderson. Smoltz and Matsuzaka will take Jones and Penny's spots on the roster. Bard looks great. I'd like to see Bowden, too, but currently there's no spot for him. Lugo and Green are just awful. Just pick up Omar Vizquel for whatever. Bailey and Baldelli serve no purpose. I'd rather have just about anybody else as a reserve outfielder.

[COD]

Theo has engineered 2 World Series victories. Paddy has engineered 0. I think I'll trust in Theo just a little bit longer.

[h.b.]

Sorry, COD. I hate the title today too.

I strip was late today because of it. I thought I already posted then started to see emails come in connected to yesterday's strip and realized I hadn't ever hit publish (got distracted) and hadn't titled it. Ugh, stared at screen for 5 mins then just said anything is better than nothing.

And now you're stuck with Chris Cross.

[Rob in CT]

Hey ChickenLittle24, would you please calm down? Jesu Chritsi, man, it's freaking Mid-May! You sound like a MFY fan. No, I'm not a fan of Lugo or his performance overall - SS does seem to be be Theo's Achille's Tendon - but blaming Bucholz for not making the WS last year? Dude, you EAT Sriracha, you don't SMOKE it! Soulie is right - you really are sounding the spoiled Post-04 brat.

Big O was talking about picking up Omar Vizquel on his show yesterday. Apparently you're a big sports talk guy. Just how many calls to the Whiner Line to they let you make per day over at WEEI?

Fuckin' buzz kill... Damn!

[Natalie]

But thankfully not Kris Kross, hb. Jump! Jump!

[soxoshanka]

The season is tanking? Are you watching in Hi-Def?
Those are Drop Sox on the left shoulder of the away uniform not Chief Wahoo.

Have a shot of Jameson's Paddy and calm down.

[Soulie]

Oh noez! We might not have home field in the playoffs! And we might not win the World Series!

If you have your panties in a twist over that in May, and it affects your ability to enjoy the grand story arc of a full season, you are an empty husk of a human being.

[h.b.]

"...enjoy the grand story arc of a full season..."

Oh, man, that gets right to the essence of it all, doesn't it?

[Jeff in NC]

"and into the bedroom door intrudes... a freckled frown to spoil the mood" - Jesus Paddy, do you actually like the redsox at all? you're sounding like the person who says they love their husband or wife, but complains about EVERYTHING about them - get a fuckin' divorce if its that bad. We all have our issues with certain players named Lugo and certain Francoma oriented managerial moves, but I am not actually thinking I've seen a positive post out of you in awhile - no that you owe me or anybody one, but sheesh... 90 wins? 100 wins? who cares as long as they playing in October, and playing well. Remember the Mariners of a few years ago? GREAT regular season team, lots of wins, satisfied day after managers all over the Pac north west. Don't remember them? Exactly.

[Kaz]

Now I know you're full of it, paddy. You claim management's decision to keep playing Ortiz has already cost us "a minimum of 5 wins", yet you claim in your most recent post that management will end up costing us 8-10 games on the season ("This is a 100 win team, easily. Management is quickly turning it into a 90-92 win team.").

So either A) you think the management is going to miraculously going to pull out of this nosedive they have us in and only accumulate 3-5 more bad-decision-based losses over the next 4+ months after having already caused 5 in only 1+ months, OR B) you think that despite management's best efforts to tank us at a rate of 5 losses off of our potential per every month and a half, David Ortiz will pull us back from the brink of their defeat 10 or so times! Thus, management will only affect our record 10 times total rather than 20 total over the whole season (5 per 1.5 months from your Ortiz prediction, over 6 total months).

And since we all know your spoken thoughts on choice B...well, then you think it's management's saving graces in the last 3/4 of the season...but we know your spoken thoughts on choice A too! So, I can clearly not choose the wine that's in front of me! Inconceivable!

You are clearly wrong in your own logic about management's effect on the record, Ortiz's effect on our record, or some random combination of the two (like...mmmm, both?). So, I think I'll take your doomy soothsaying with a grain of salt, thanks.

TL;DR (too long didn't read) version: Paddy says Papi = -5 games in 1.5 months. Paddy says Theo = -10 games in 6 months. It can't be both. QED, Paddy is crazy.

[Kaz]

PS - Papi says screw you, paddy. Tek, Bay, and Lowell all send their regards as well.

[[email protected]]

Bob's at Pete's but wanted me to write this.

Beauty in all ways

Beauty shines tonight, hard stars

Beauty makes me cry.

(I think that he was moved by Papi's home run)

[Billy Mahty]

sweet

[Lazlo Freem]

What a difference a day makes. Let us savor the moment.

[Bob]

All I wanted was a glass of water.

(See "A Mighty Wind.")