Oh, yeah, uh-huh, that's right...

Bill:
So you know how some people say that Boston fans are nothing but a bunch of arrogant pricks and Massholes extraordinaire?

 

---

Bill:
Well, I'm pretty sure they're talking about me this morning.

 

---

Doug:
Are you kidding me? My ego is so big it needs its own department of homeland security to keep the riff raff out.

 

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Bill:
Hello, Tampa Bay? I'd like you to meet my two friends, "PECOTA" and "Regression to the Mean"

 

---

Doug:
Mothafofo first place at the All Stah Break!

 

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Bill:
The preordained chosen ones have once again secured their rightful place as fulfillahs of providential destiny.

 

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Doug:
Memo to all the hatahs: Kiss my hairy but waxed, Franco-American, callipygian ass.

 

---

Bill:
There it is. Bottle it, bitches.

 

---

Comments

[chris]

//Bottle it.//

classic. i have a new favorite phrase.

also, i've never rooted for the indians so much in my life. my firends thought i'd lost it until i explained my motivation. i guess it finally was tribe time.

[david]

bottle it bitches...and know that this will be as fine a vintage as ever!

[Colin]

Now this is the way it ought to be. The Sox back upon their rightful place before the All-Star Game with the Rays in second. Granted the Rays will pick themselves up that's for sure. However...we in Boston must be prepared to counter every move they make.

Of course the way is REALLY ought to be is the MFY back in last place like in the beginning in the season but I guess you can't have your cake and eat it too eh?

[louclinton]

You're welcome.

lc

[Harwich Rich]

What's that scientific axiom about all things seeking their own level? :)

[louclinton]

@HR:

"Manny's maxim"

[Rob in CT]

"Bottle it, bitches."

I've found two opportunities to use that phase already this morning. As with most that is cool and hip, I'll wear that bitchin' phrase out in no time. The motha of awesome turns of phrase, hb. Right up there with "resplendence..."

da kine - get the silk screen ready.

[Rob in CT]

uh, "phrase", not "phase". Dumbass.

Need a XL Dunkin Donut turbo this morning. Badly.

[yazbread]

Tampa Bay having the all-star break to contemplate a 7-game slid is the frosting on the cake.

[h.b]

OK, I have to confess that the "bottle it" phrase I stole from punter Todd Sauerbrun.

According to Stefan Fatsis reporting in his latest book, A Few Seconds of Panic: A 5-Foot-8, 170-Pound, 43-Year-Old Sportswriter Plays in the NFL, it's one of Sauerbrun's fave things to say. Like you guys, as soon as I read it I loved it.

BTW I highly recommend the Fatsis book. (Transparency: Stefan Fatsis is a Soxaholix fan and wrote the WSJ story about the site back in October 05.)

[da kine]

I think I've bottle the essence of Marty. I haven't talked shit to my Stankeefan friends for weeks, and then yesterday I was texting trashtalk like Paris Hilton coming out of the Ivy. What is the anti-Marty called?

[louclinton]

Fatsis is also married to an NPR lady (Melissa Block) and wrote a terrific book about Scrabble. The fact that he occasionally reads this space is both troubling and fun.

lc

[Natalie]

My little brother the Yanks fan just emailed me positively APOPLECTIC about Francona not starting Mariano in the AS game. Oh how far Yanks fandom has fallen that they are getting their panties in a twist over an exhibition game. :)

hb, thanks for the book rec. Looks most excellent, and I laughed out loud at your final frame, so there you go. I also just picked up Carl Hiaasen's "The Downhill Lie: A Hacker's Return to a Ruinous Sport," a memoir about golf. Anyone read it? It's my beach reading this coming weekend...

[Natalie]

lc- what's the Scrabble book? I am a Scrabble junkie (www.scrabulous.com, people, mark it down) so I'd be interested in picking that one up too...

[ParkerStPete]

Sort of Scrabble related comment: our favorite baseball venue is an answer in today's New York Times crossword...

[louclinton]

Here you go, Nat

[anonymous]

Is the crossword the only thing of value in that sinking ship of a paper? Last Sunday, my supermarket in NJ was selling it at 50% price but as I leafed through the reduced sections, there was no magazine. At $2.00+, it is worth zilch absent the crossword.

[Natalie]

Thanks, lc. Looks good.

Anon- I totally agree. I pony up the $5.00 and rarely read the actual paper. It's all for the puzzle. This week's was funny, did you do it?

Spoiler alert: the title was Parting Shots and the phrase that ran through the entire puzzle was "To die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather, not screaming in terror like the people in his car." I laughed out loud at that one...

[ParkerStPete]

Mostly agree with the comments on The New York Times. If it wasn't for the puzzle(s) and the obituaries, it wouldn't be worth a damn. I enjoyed yesterday's puzzle, but in general I find the Sunday x-word a bit boring -- a too-big Wednesday puzzle. Give me a killer Friday or Saturday 15 x 15, or an acrostic, diagramless, or other Sunday variation any day. And the NYT sports section is unmentionable.

[Natalie]

Oh PSP could not agree more. I actually subscribe to the online NYT puzzle archives and only do the Fri/Sat puzzles. Have you tried the cryptic crosswords? Those things are a bitch but completely awesome. Emily Cox and Henry Rathvon do books of them that kick my ass into next week...in a good way.

Am I going to hell because I cheered aloud to read of Lugo's injury? That little voodoo doll that I made must have done the trick. :)

[Jason O.]

You know, it's a difficult burden being correct (Rays) 100% of the time. The best part was the befuddled look on Joe Maddon's face from behind his metrosexual glasses.

Going to Fenway on July 25th. Looking forward to the spectacle of MLB players in a park with little league dimensions.

Will buy a soxaholix t-shirt a beer sight unseen. If a guy hands you a beer and says nothing, it's me.

[ParkerStPete]

Nat, never was a cryptic fan. My fave of the less common formats is the "sinew/screw" (at least that's what I call it) where you get the in/cr but have to guess the s--ew part. Will Shortz is my God.

[Griffin]

I don't get Yankees fans being upset over Rivera not starting.

1. The man is a CLOSER. He's been doing it forever. You want to throw him out of his routine to start the AS game?

2. Rivera has said he doesn't want to start.

3. There are starters (Cliff Lee) who earned the honor.

4. You honestly want Jonathan Papelbon closing the last AS game in Yankee Stadium?

I always thought Yankee fans were morons. This confirms it.

[sonomasox]

@Lugo injury: The obvious Q -

What happens if Lowrie really is the next coming of your favorite diety?

[NYSoxfan]

anyone catch the NYPD putting a two-handed chokehold on some dude trying to grab a homerun derby ball in center field? Almost as classic a moment for MLB as the shot of Giuliani showing off his free seat. Whatta town... I look forward to seeing 7 All-Star Sox parading up 6th Avenue tomorrow. The spectacle before the spectacle. Go AL!

[Steve in MD]

If I were Tito, I'd not only start Mo, I'd have him pitch 7 or 8 innings...

120 or so pitches would do wonders for his arm.

[Matt]

please signup for the Fenway West second half contest to win two etched pint glasses. Good Luck.

enter at:

www.fenwaywest.com