Welcome to the past perfect progressive

Mike:
Holy shit blowing a 21-3 lead in a game for all the marbles? I so can't believe this is happening to us.

 

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Susan/Circle:
I'm totally dumbstruck. They went into the lockah room at half-time as the New England Patriots and they came out for the 2nd half as the 2004 Yankees.

 

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Mike:
They chocked on jello for frigs sake.

 

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Susan/Circle:
The beauty that was the Tom Brady era is no more.

 

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Susan/Circle:
The beautiful things nevah last.

 

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Mike:
The beautiful are found at the edge of a room crumpled into spidahs and needles and silence and we can never understand why they left.

 

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Susan/Circle:
The beautiful die young and leave the ugly to their ugly lives.

 

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Mike:
This has hit me right square in the sacral chakra. My gonads ache fercrissakes.

 

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Susan/Circle:
Are you kidding me? I feel like I've been on the wrong end of a female circumcision. And I'll never know pleasure again.

 

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Mike:
Now that the Patriots have begun their slide into the past perfect progressive to join the Celtics and Bruins as has beens, it's up to the Red Sox to save us.

 

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Susan/Circle:
God help us all.

 

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Author's Notes:

The "beautiful are found at the edge …" and "The beautiful die young …" are from the Charles Bukowski poem "what's the use of a title" in the collection Burning in Water Drowning in Flame.

Comments

[louclinton]

that sucked.

lc

[Jack]

It did suck to lose that game, but the Pats gave it their all and the Colts had to play a near perfect game to win. I still don't like the Colts but they (especially Manning) really earned my respect last night. And they earned the win.

[Bob]

Fuck the Colts and Manning and everything else in the world.

Bitter? No, not me. Never.

Not even after falling asleep on the Orange line afyter the game, and riding back and forth from Forest Hills to Oak Grove four times.

Did I mention that Manning should be bung-holed by Ron Jeremy?

[Billy Mahty]

The worst part about it -- How many more Peyton (and Eli) Manning commercials can we endure?

It's interesting that in all the speculation in last Friday's thread, no one considered the possibility that both Indy and Chicago would advance.

[COD]

The announcers kept referring to how hot it was in the dome. I wonder if Indy somehow knew that the Pats were getting beat up by the flu, and cut off the AC to make them even more miserable.

Brilliant move if it wasn't just a coincidence.

But yeah, in the end the Colts made the plays when they needed to. And really, no team that gives up 32 points in a half deserves to win.

[louclinton]

It did sound like the Colts were playing the old "turn the heat up in the Garden to 120 degrees in June" gag.

The Pats were gracious in defeat. If you don't know how to conduct yourself when you lose, you don't deserve to win. see e.g LT

Having suffered through that virus thing that was going around, and still enervated to the point of being barely able to pound these keys, the defense just got gassed. When guys I never heard of are in the defensive secondary at the end of the game, you knew the Pats were toast.

lc

[mikeya2k1]

the way i see it is the pats were lucky to get as far as they did. they should have never made it past the chargers. they fought well but the defence wore down. i guess im unlike many people on here in that i dont have a problem with peyton manning. until this year he was the best player in the nfl and is the face of it. the colts are not the yankees we dont need to have to hate a team or a player for that matter. errrr unless its the jets. go colts!!

[h.b.]

I've got a hangover the size of Mt Fucking Katahdin which would be bearable if the Pats had won but which instead is killing me.

I haven't felt this pitiful in a long, long time.

Oh, and if you didn't hear, this is "officially" the most depressing day of the year.

Great.

[IkeG]

Sorry, Pats fans, but that was a fantastic game. Almost makes me want to be an NFL fan again. Forget all the stupid, made-up crap (does anybody aside from the Manning family really give a damn what Archie Manning thinks of his sons?), that game had everything.

Now we get to see the Colts destroy the Bears. If Peyton Manning pushes your gag reflex button, I recommend you not watch the Super Bowl.

[Billy Mahty]

Watching two offenses roll over two D's for 60 minutes doesn't really make for a great game in my book. To each his own.

[Jason O.]

Una salus victis nullam sperare salutem

(The one hope for the vanquished is to have no hope of safety)

-Virgil, "Aeneid"

[Rooster]

What a shame - we were so close to taking that game - well fought on both sides.

I do not think this was necessarily a game decider, but did anyone notice how quickly they glossed over the 'roughing the passer' call on the Colt's last TD drive? I did not see anything on the play at all, and it moved the Colts a LOT closer to a TD. Usually a crucial play like that is reviewed a million times. Did I miss something? I just wanted to see it to laugh at what a stupid call the refs made (I hate roughing the passer calls unless they are tuly blatant).

[Jason O.]

BTW, have you seen the news that MLB is taking the Extra Innings package off of cable and making it the exclusive domain of DirecTV?

Then I thought about it for a second, and this offense to the baseball fan fits perfectly with Selig and MLB:

Credo quia absurdum

(I believe it precisely because it is not reasonable)
-Tertullian

[NolaSox]

I cannot stand Joe Buck! He can salt a wound like no other. And then he becomes a patronizing ass at the end of the game. I swore at him more than Fred Thomas.

[meredith]

My only consolation, however slight, is that at least the Pats didn't lose by a last-second Vinatieri field goal. That would've been B.F. Dent and A.F. Boone rolled into one.

But "great game"? Please. The Pats defense forgot to come back out of the locker room after halftime (good point re the turning off the A/C, I'm sure the Colts did it on purpose).

All I can say is, if the Pats let Asante Samuel walk b/c they're still too cheap to pay for talent despite the lessons of this season, I'm going to drive up to Foxboro and personally choke Belichick with my Wesleyan sweatshirt.

Go Bears!!!

[Natalie]

The highlight of the game: Peyton Manning's face in the final minutes of the first half. He looked as shellshocked and panicked as Ashlee Simpson realizing she was lipsynching to the wrong song on SNL. Too bad it didn't last... The final 30 min were excrutiating.

Small consolation: Heroes is back tonight.

[Devine]

If that's true, Jason O, then I shall be infuriated beyond reason. It seems extremely counterintuitive to take the games away from the place where the most people can watch it (nice job again on the whole "for the fans" thing, MLB). Goddamn, that sucks. It's the only way I can watch the Red Sox on TV at home...

[yazbread]

Tough loss yesterday but I felt the Pats were doing the smoke and mirrors bit all season long. Would have been nice to have Cliff Branch there yesterday or any honest deep threat. Hopefully, the team does not repeat this experiment next year. The CBS broadcast was terrible. I think Jim Nance has a crush on Peyton Manning and the Colts. What a one-sided broadcast.

The DirectTV bit has me worried. I have followed the team for the last three years on cable. The family will usually watch most of the games together. Now we will have to sit in the car listening to XM radio for an entire season. I refuse to get DirectTV just for the Sox.

[miketc]

15 minutes after the end of the game, right after I prepared for today's hangover by ordering another drink, there was only one thing that made me feel better (alcohol aside):

3 weeks 'till TRUCK DAY.

[yazbread]

Drinking during a toss-up game is risky. The team wins and the alcohol sits so fine with the elation. The team loses and the alcohol just fuels the bitterness and everyone need to stay of the way.

[h.b.]

Drinking during a toss-up game is risky.

So true!

But get this, I didn't start pushing myself into an "In the stadium of everybody" state of inebriation until half-time.

Now I know in football being up 2 touchdowns at the half is far from a guarantee but this was the Colts! And fuck if they didn't look demoralized and beaten. At that point, I felt really pretty certain of the win.

Yeah, didn't I learn anything from Game 6 86?

Evidently, no. Besides, these are the Brady/Belichik Patriots. They don't let teams come back like that in the playoffs.

The just don't.

Until they did.

[Kmetzie]

Wow what a depressing strip! The Brady era is far from over IMO. The team made it to the AFC Championship game during a "rebuilding" year. With two first rounders next year I like the odds of winning at least one more before Brady's time is up.

With all that said the game was a very bitter pill to swallow. Who thought Peyton would lead a comeback after Samuels defensive touchdown? Not I!

[Scott]

I am very depressed today about the Pats. I still can't believe they lost that game. They had their foot on the Colts neck at the end of the half and couldn't get it done. Going up 28-3 would have done it. Then they go soft on D for the next Colts drive. WTF. Playcalling in the second half was suspect as well. Even after all of that they could have iced the game with a couple 1st downs at the end. 12-friggn men in the huddle. That's not a trait of a BB coached team. Maybe the offence was out of gas too. I will not watch this SB. I will do something more productive with my time than watch TV for 4-hours. Damn. I all but had my flight to Miami booked in my head after the 1st half.

[FarmBoy]

Join my campaign to change Reche's name to Richochet. The bullets just bounce off him.

[Edgy Reggie]

Cheer up h.b. You probably don't want to here this from me, but the Pats are far from done. They've still got a great core and they'll plug in a few new pieces next year and once again be one of the favorites to win it all.

As for the game, after that interception by Samuel to put the Pats up 21-3, I was considering walking out to the kitchen and sticking my head in the oven. Even after the Colts were able to come back and make it close, I was nervous as a whore in church and had this feeling of impending doom.

It was a good thing for the Colts that Brady had only 54 seconds left after the kickoff and had to force things a bit. With a little more time, it could well have been a different outcome.

It's just nice to finally get by you guys after the big disappointments you've laid on us the past few years.

BTW, I admired the class displayed by the Pats after the game, especially Teddy B. offering congratulations and good luck to Manning and the Colts.

The Colts still have some work to do. If they don't beat the Bears, it'll be back to square one next year. And the Colts have a lot of free agents and not much cap space so this year may be their best shot at a ring.

Anyway, you've still got your 3 rings and a bright future. Brady is in his prime. And just remember that even the best get beat once in a while. Sort of like, uh...Mariano Rivera.

[Bob]

Nice, classy post, Reggie. Appreciated.

However, comparing Tom Brady to Mariano Rivera is like comparing Pope John Paul II to Charles Manson. They were both really good at what they did, but one is pure evil.

[Edgy Reggie]

Naw Bob, Rivera quit all that voodoo black magic shit after he left Panama. He may still dabble a little bit during the offseason, but wtf.

[h.b.]

FWIW Rivera, like Trot Nixon, Curt Schilling, Tim Wakefield, Jason Varitek and a large percentage of MLB players, is an evangelical Christian.

[Edgy Reggie]

If I made that much money I'd be praisin' the Lord too.

[Bob]

H.B., so is Jim Baker.

[h.b.]

Yep, lots of Evangelicals out there. It's the fastest growing branch of Christianity.

Not sure what the percentage is in MLB but I have read several teams make it policy to sign Evangelicals, notably the Rockies and the Rangers.

Guess that makes sense in the "baseball is a reflection of the culture as a whole" way of looking at the game.

Me, I'd sign a Wiccan if he could get batters out or hit 50 dingers.

[Scott]

"Me, I'd sign a Wiccan if he could get batters out or hit 50 dingers."

Amen to that!

[Jeff]

I'm just glad that we got beat fair and square. No Buckner or Grady moments, ya know? No boneheaded Reid-like 4th-and-15 punts. No Tony Romo miscue. No McNabb slow-offense vomiting. At best there were some Reche Caldwell dropped passes, but he caught one earlier. 21-6 sounds huge but it was only a two-score lead with Indy serving first after half-time. I'm depressed, but I can live with this.

[Jason O.]

...which explains all the championships that the Rockies and Rangers have won.

I recall reading that Catholicism is growing fast in Africa and Asia.

It certainly seems like Evangelicals are everywhere because they're always yapping about it.

[Sox Fan in VA]

Yaz, if you've got the righ tkind of XM radio, you could always buy the indoor adapter kit. It's fifty bucks or so---which is why I don't have one---but it does provide an alternative to listening in the car.

People look at you funny when you sit in the driveway listening to the radio, regardless of what NPR says.

[h.b.]

...which explains all the championships that the Rockies and Rangers have won.

Evidently, the 2004 Red Sox had the highest percentage of Evangelicals on the team of any MLB team ever.

Now, I'm not at all suggesting that is anything more than a coincidence regarding how that season turned out, but it is curious bit of info.

Meanwhile, you think Manny is religious?

For some reason, I can't help but think of the "I like the baby Jesus" scene from The Ballad of Ricky Bobby when I imagine Manny and religion.

[yazbread]

I could not imagine anything worst than spending March - October with a bunch of guys all enamored with Christ. You might as well be living in a seminary. Hard to figure out the connection - you think by now they have figured out that the power of prayer does not help you hit .400. Maybe there is nothing to do in the minor other than read the good book?

[h.b.]

you think by now they have figured out that the power of prayer does not help you hit .400

From a piece in Maine Today:

"But do athletes believe God can directly determine the outcome of games? In the 1990s, San Francisco Giants first baseman Will Clark reportedly approached one of his own pitchers. The pitcher had given up a home run and later said it was "God's will." Clark, also a Christian, commended him for his faith, but corrected him. 'The Lord didn't hang that slider,' Clark reportedly said.

"New Red Sox pitcher Matt Clement knows the hanging sliders are his own doing. He prays to God, but not for breaking balls painting the outside corner.

"'There are probably a handful of people who pray and think the Lord is going to help them hit home runs,' Clement said. 'To me, it's much deeper than that.'"

[Edgy Reggie]

I was born and raised a strict Catholic and went to a parochial school taught by mostly nuns for 12 years. Lot of good it did me.

BTW, I'm going to burn in hell for eternity on an impure thoughts/masturbation rap unless there's some sort of a blanket pardon on Judgement Day. I've got my fingers crossed.

[IkeG]

h.b., from what I know about Clark's ego, I think the actual exchange was:
Pitcher: "God's will, I guess"
Clark: "That's right, son, God is Will"

[Sorry about the Pats]

Three things:

1. Worst championship collapse in NFL championship history.
2. Someone needs to drug test Reche Caldwell immediately. What the eff was he on?
3. Phantom untouched sack/collapse by Tom Brady in the third quarter at the 50 yard line was reminiscent of some of the gutless moves of QB Jim "Chris" Everett of the LA Rams in the early 90's. Not a good memory or comparison.

[Bob]

Sorry About the Pats;

Let's see, Tom Brady is gutless and can be compared to Jim Everett?

That's about as likely as you listing your actual email address.

Troll.

[Tommy Lasorda]

I saw that play too. Don't kill the messenger. Brady did go down like a sack of potatoes. Untouched. What's up with that?