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July Hiatus

Your omniscient author in absentia:
The Soxaholix are on vacation and will return no later than July 3rd [Oops, make that July 5]. Go Sox!


Your omniscient author in absentia:
Update: TypePad was suppposed to autopost the above on Tuesday morning so you'd have a place to comment on new events while I was gone, but it didn't work.


Your omniscient author in absentia:
No matter because I wanted to check in to mention the 11 win streak. (This streak of course has another cool name generated by you in the comments, but I dare not mention it for fear of jinxing it! Unlike the characters, I still have my superstitions.)


Your omniscient author in absentia:
Meanwhile, my "Be Dan Shaughnessy" faux piece can be found here at BSMW: The House on Mango Street." If any of you (Bob?) have one over there, please leave the link in the comments so I can check it out. OK, Now I'm back to vacation… Go Sox!



Watched last night's game with King Logan and I have to say he really makes it look easy. He seemed to exert very little effort but the results are astounding. At one point I said, I want a strike out here, Logan, and voila, Beckett gets the K!

I taught him how to spell Yastrzemski and told him about Teddy Ballgame. (My hubby, a little sore from the drubbing his Metsies were taking, mentioned Ted being stored in two boxes somewhere...grrrr.)

11 in a row! Kid2 rules!

Can we not mention the L.R. now H.B.? Talking about it before hasn't seemed to hurt the streak.

Well, I know I HAVE to mention it because it's what's working.

Oh, here's the link to my CHB "column." It's REALLY short (I couldn't stand doing it; it really made me feel quite sick to my stomach). But that said, I spent all of five minutes writing it. Unlike your poetic prose, H.B., I played off of CHB's narcissism and love of making himself part of the story.

I DID correctly predict Bob Ryan's "call to arms" column in favor of cheering Petey. But that was pretty much a no brainer.


(Sorry about the column's headline. I just thought it was something a Globe headline writer would do to piss off CHB.)

By all means, everyone keep doing what they're doing. I've been out of the loop and haven't been mentioning it, which is why I don't want to now.

If that makes sense. Jinx logic. I have a whole rule book. :)

Okay, Tessie. Now remind us again: what's the name of that movie?

Da Kine's post from two days ago:

//I for one welcome Pedro's return to Boston. I say cheer him when he warms up, then cheer when he gets pulled in the 3rd inning because of the monstrous onslaught of runs scored by our beloved Red Sox offense. //

Yikes, Kreskin. Got any lottery numbers for me?

hb. I am a firm believer and follower of the First Book of Jinx, I've worn the same pair of red socks for 8 straight games in my recent past...whatever works!

That being said, Logan's Run is 11 games, baby!

Let's not forget the Airport to Be Named Later. Go Sawhx. Poor Pete. He's sound more like JohnNY "Iwannagohome" Damon every day.

lc (big Johnny L&%!n baseball fan back in the day)

"you dumped him, like a syphilis laden blanket in an Abenaki longhouse"

You never cease to come up with these great lines HB. Great faux CHB.

BTW, here's CHB's actual Pedro column (although written after the game instead of the presumed pre-match-up piece):


I'm officially severing all interest in Boston Dirt Dogs. I was a faithful reader until the "Johnny Damon should be exalted" period, and the new "Pedro should be beheaded" phase...said periods tied together with an insidious 'fans are retahded' thread, with some rather telling anti-Sox fan commentary from none other than Joe Torre. I say piss on the BDD..enough is enough. The Soxaholix provide us with more than enough perspective, humor and occasionally profound commentary, in a smaller package with less flatulence.

"The power of Logan COMPELS you! The power of Logan COMPELS you!"

Keep that boy's tidies clean, Tessie.


p.s. - HB, another masterpiece. It even SMELLED like the Curly Haired Boyfriend. "Abenaki longhouse" Ha!

I still fear the young one's power. I think he is telepathically linking to Sox fans everywhere. Last night, listening on XM, as Joe C was calling Lowell's fly ball to Milledge, I suddenly got this feeling that he was going to drop it. Granted, that feeling could have been borne out of his adventure in left the night before, but I like the telepathic angle. Yeah, Logan!

If Milledge runs headlong into the monster tonight, will he leave a Lastings impression? (Sorry)

If Milledge runs headlong into the monster tonight, will he leave a Lastings impression? (Sorry)

LOL, I think Logan is affecting your brain. :)

I'd rather watch Logan on this week's Sunday sports shows than CHB and some of those other bobbleheads. I think he'd probably bring more perspective to the streak than they ever will.

Logan's Run keeps on rollin'...
Proud Tessie keeps on lovin'...

Rollin' down the season.

Hilarious CHB send-up, hb, but I realized how hard it is to out-do the real thing for sheer idiocy and pandering. To wit, today's gem: "When Pedro got to the dugout, Mr. Met greeted him with the ``We're not worthy" gesture. It is known that Mr. Met does not get along particularly well with Wally the Green Monster (it's one of those Pedro-Schilling jealousy things) and Mr. Met's willingness to fly to Boston for this game underscored the magnitude of the event." To steal from Bill Simmons, I just threw up in my mouth.

Re: last night, was I the only one weirdly upset that it was such a rout? I really wanted to see vintage Pedro, with our boys victorious in a 2-1 squeaker. Okay, now I'm going to go count my money and complain its not green enough. :)

Fuck dirtdogs. They're reactionary idiots enough of the time, but the whole Pedro thing was beyond the pale. I thought they were over the top begging Sox fans to boo Pedro, but that crap this morning, calling fans obtuse, like they're the fucking guardians of Proper Red Sox Fandom, and then trying to write some revisionist history bullshit about how there was only "a smattering of cheers", acting like Pedro's the only one pretending there was anything more--that's just pathetic wishful thinking. It was patently obvious watching that that was a heartfelt outpouring by the Sox fans to Pedro, and that the moment meant a lot to both us and to him, but the neanderthal mouthbreathers at dirtdogs were apparently watching another game last night.

Aside from that, if it's true, Pedro said he got caught up in the emotion of the moment, and it affected his pitching. On the flip side, throughout his career, he's been a guy who motivates himself through perceieved slights, from Lasorda saying he'd never be a starter, to being traded for only Delino DeShields, to even not getting the respect he thought he had coming from the Sox. We cheered Pedro, and he pitched like shit, but I hav no doubt whatsoever that if he'd been booed like Damon, he'd have pitched a vintage Pedro 7 IP, 1 ER, 10K performance. Not that I think the jackasses at dirtdogs could have comprehended anything so complex as that.

A new site will be up and running in a couple days:


Feel free to come on by

Red Sox Nation snipes at each other...
Alex Rodriguez hits a walk off homer...
Wild geese that fly with the moon on their wings...

These are a few of my favorite things...

Hey Jaosn, does this make it better:

Fuck off

And Arod needs to do that about 10 times more this season just to sniff Papi's taint

and to call Silvia a "fan" is like calling Giambi "not a cheat"

...when the haters hate
and they overrate,
the members of their team...
I simply remember my favorite things,
and then my smile just beams!!

You know, Im really just a douchebag sometimes. Im sorry about my above statements. Maybe I shouldnt talk trash when my team is 3.5 gamnes down.

And maybe, just maybe, I like attention, and that's why I try to post on Red Sox sites so pople will respond to me. It's because my dady used to touch me "there".

Then again, Im a yankees fan, so it's goes without saying that Im a giant asshole and I like to fuck little boys, like Arod

Sorry about this all folks. I promise not to be such a stupid fucker in the future

JO - You are a lot easier to take when you can at least admit you're an asshole. Kind of liberating, huh?


Clearly from the threads today, both the MFY's and RSN have their fair share of douchebags. It's nice that civility seems to rule the roost (most of the time) here at the Soxaholix. People of good humor can disagree and still keep it more or less pleasant. Don't anyone view that as an invitation for more MFY'ers to join the party. Our smattering adds just the right amount of spice to keep things lively.

AS for myself, I've really laughed over the Logan's Run posts, which I'm happy to give you credit for starting with a clever observation. Sorry I won't be around to cheer the Mets on to a Series sweep this weekend, as I leave for vacation tomorrow. I'll just have to leave it to Logan's capable diaper to see that Torre and Company shit the bed.

Only a Yankees fan could look at an extra innings affair against the 2006 Braves bullpen and simply cheer the fact that A-Rod got a BP pitch from an AAAtlanta player to take over the fence...rather than lament the 3.5 games back and wonder why the rest of the entire lineup was baffled by the good ol' boys from GA.

I guess when there's no joy in Gotham, they have to cling to whatever small glimmers of light that they have.

I apologize for my previous impersonation of Jason O.

I realize that simply because my mother dressed me as a girl and sodomized me with a turkey baster at age 8, I should not lash out at others...

Kaz, you're nothing if not reliable:

...what then should one make of the exalted 12th inning walk-off against Philadelphia? Was Ortiz facing the best pitcher in the Phillies organization?

Win's a win, my man....and this 3.5 trivial games back? Enjoy your June streak....

With Brett Myers' legal troubles, Tom Gordon (Ortiz's victim) may soon be the best pitcher in the Phillies organization.

Another note ... I know at least a few people who have XM, giving them the ability to listen to home broadcasts of many different ML teams. I'm curious about who the best and worst non-Sox announcers are. I can say:
- The Blue Jays guys are boring and not particularly insightful
- The Orioles guys always sound a little bitter to me
- The Cubs guys are likeable (though I can't take too much of Ron Santo)
- I dig the Royals guys --- they call a pretty good game
- John Sterling for the Yankees is OK:
--- plus side, he seems almost as excited about homers by Yankee foes as he is about Yankee home runs
--- negative side, he's quite the pollyanna, almost as if his job depends on him being extremely kind to all Yankees (except Chacon) - case in point: last year, he talked about Jared Wright as if he was Cy Young himself

12 and 4. Im SO looking forward the the MFy not making the playoffs!!

dont know how many saw it, but in the 12th of the ny-aaatlanta game, rent a wreck made a great play on jeter. derek must have said it cant be the same guy. a little success for a-rod will keep him in the hunt, its good for him to feel goood about himself going to therapy.

"And maybe, just maybe, I like attention, and that's why I try to post on Red Sox sites so pople will respond to me. It's because my dady used to touch me "there".

Then again, Im a yankees fan, so it's goes without saying that Im a giant asshole and I like to fuck little boys, like Arod"

Jason O.'s Impersonator's incessant homophobia/molestation ranting is in poor, poor taste. It hits me the same as if he were to write: "My daddy's a dirty nigger, and I'm a money-grubbing jewbag." It's sour, and beneath all of the posters but one, apparently, on this blog. If you're hung up on gay folk, it's probably time for you to take a good, long, honest look in the mirror.

I'm not getting all PC here. Discrimination is pretty simple, and it's fucked up.

Sorry to get so serious, everyone.

At any rate, Coco Crisp's center field catch was a fine "touche" to Melky's catch. Just speed, positioning, and a pure leap of faith. Boooooooo!

Following IkeG's request for folks to share their views on best/worst non-sox radio announcers, here's some thoughts:

Worst: Sterling of the NYY - hands down putrid. Doesn't even tell you what gap the ball is hit to for an extra base hit. Will never tell you when an opposing player makes a great play. (The only hint is his utter dejection as he tries to make it sound like a lucky play.) Raissman and Mushnick of the NY tabloids give regular updates on his pomposity. It's a mystery how this guy keeps his job. Best theory is that Sterling must have photos and negatives of Georgie Boy and J.Edgar Hoover engaged in some kinky transvestite play at a Motel 6.

Best: None that are alive or presently broadcasting. Present ones are now products of marketing research and the Syracuse school of New Schtick (thanks ESPN and Berman.) Ernie Harwell's soft Georgia peach voice giving the listener what they wanted (including shutting up to hear the crack of the bat) was the best. Also, the guy from Oakland (name: King?) who never wore socks and only drove 10yr old used cars was a true gem who made you feel like you were sitting with your knowledgable Grandpa giving you insights into the strategy instead of trying to make himself the show.

Gov. Skink, that Oakland announcer was Bill King. He passed away a year or two ago. Perhaps best known as the Oakland Raiders announcer during their glory years (Stabler, Blanda, etc.).

"Holy Toledo!" was his signature call. He was certainly one of a kind.

Hey Gov, I'm not sure which Sterling you're talking about, because if you were listening to the game a couple days back, for example, you'd have heard Sterling call, "a line shot from Jeter, and Renteria MAKES THE PLAY! Oh, what a play to rob Jeter of a base hit! Jeter hit it right on the screws and Renteria made an outstanding play to take a hit away from Jeter...he timed his jump perfectly..." etc. He may be a homer and give more props to Yankees than they deserve, but to suggest that he isn't effusive in his praise of both the talents and plays of the opposition is totally disingenuous. He gives Ortiz home runs the same "It is high, it is far, it is gone!" call he gives to the Yanks, and he goes out of his way to highlight the skills of the oppostion.

Little Logan is two weeks old today and so is this fun run. 12 in a row.

Yeah, Logan! I'm assuming he had a hand in Crisp's diving catch.

Big test on the road against Dontrelle "What You Talkin Bout" Willis. No idea what this Jason Johnson is going to do, but I feel better that Schilling was able to go 7 and spare the pen a couple of innings.

When Wright first hit that ball, I thought that maybe Logan had made a poopy. But evidentally, mom and dad made the diaper change quickly enough to allow Coco's fan-frigging-tastic snag.

Logan's Run is amazing. Uh, just a question Tessie: did some light-skinned dude named Gabriel visit you and tell you about Logan's impending birth?

What a game last night. Stellar defense (not just from Crisp, but Lowell's barehanding, Loretta to Youk, Kapler cutting off Lo Duca's down-the-liner, etc). Smallball from Coco and the sacrifices to move him over and get him in. Heavyball from Loretta and Papi. And oh, yeah, Schill to Timlin to Paps. The whole thing was textbook, a complete team win, a joy to watch.

I know all about coincidence. I mean, there were probably hundreds of babies born the day this streak started...

But Tessie's Logan is different. Tessie came here as soon as she knew and told us about the kid. He's no Johnny-left-lately. He's just Red Sox magic through and through.

Shine on you crazy diamond! Logan's Run is still going strong!

So how has this streak, and in particular nearly perfectly played baseball games like last night's, effecting your day to day mood?

Me? The sky is a bluer, the birdsong better, even the trash on the street seems somehow perfectly placed...

How about tying a ML record for error-free games? That's not exactly the usual here in RSN . . .

Plus finishing a sweep of the Mets, probably the best team in the NL, and doing it by beating their two best pitchers? Gravy, boys and girls.

I will, in fact, enjoy the June streak - the Yankees haven't exactly been the A's in recent history. Losing 2-game leads is one thing, but why not bury the NYYs before they can ship King Philip for reinforcements from the Bowden Store?

Well said, h.b. I was driving to dinner last night around 8:30, with the windows and sun roof open, making my way slowly through the milling summer crowds of the North End, with Trup and Castiglione keeping me company, and the only way I can describe the sensation is to say that it reminded me of how I felt in the summer as a child- full of wonder, energy and innocent happiness- as if all I have ahead of me is time at the pool club and a game of stick ball in the neighborhood as the sun sets...

God, this run is fun. Logan, I sit in awe of your powers.

My mood is always a little bit better the day after a win (along the lines of Natalie's childhood-summer feeling) and a little bit worse (like when school started at the end of the summer) the day after a loss, no matter what.

The difference is my mood in listening to the game. When Beltran hit the homer, I thought (in lou clinton style) "meh, they'll get it back". If the homer had happened during a win-one-lose-one type streak, I'd have been thinking "jeez I hope they get it back". If during a losing streak? "If they don't come back I'm going to crash my $%^$#& car into somebody's yard".

It's harder for me to be away from NE when the Sox are hot. I can imagine the smiles and conversations on the T, at the coffee shops, and at work. But this morning after an evening where I realized a friendship I've had for 25 years was probably over, I walked outside to a beautiful day in Cleveland (yes, there is such a thing) and thought, "The Red Sox have won twelve in a row; I feel great!"

Kaz, thanks for noticing that I started this pretty early on, the first chance I had actually. I became a Sox fan at the age of 12, Logan's Papi found them through me, but Logan was born a Sox fan. That means everything in the world to me!

I have an entry in the "Be Dan Shaughnessy" contest:
Here it is:


#10, "Selective Memory for Returning Diva"


//But this morning after an evening where I realized a friendship I've had for 25 years was probably over...//

Tessie, I hope I'm not be too Hallmark-y or personal, but that must be terrible for you. I realize that sometimes it has to happen for reasons you don't need to explan in this forum, but if there's any way to save such a long-term friendship, I'd at least try. My friends are my life. I don't know what I'd do without them. And it would take an AWFUL lot for me to ever end such a friendship.

I recommend asking Logan for his advice. That kid can obviously do no wrong.

Hey, congrats, SoxSweepAgain. You came in third in the voting. Nice. I guess H.B. and I got shut out. In my case, deservedly so.

BTW, I liked both HB's and SoxSweepAgain's columns MUCH better than the winner's. I thought the idea was to "channel" CHB, not to do an out-and-out (and not-very nuanced) parody of him.

OK, so, Logan's Run technically ended, but a lifelong fan is born. 12 in a row ... not bad, kid. Whatever you've been doing, keep it up!

I'm going to miss the NL. Back to the old grind tonight against the All-Star, Kazmir.

The kid's got a story that he gets to hear every opening day for the rest of his life. Then he gets to remind his kids and his grandkids of it far into the future.

Every time he thinks of baseball and the Red Sox, he'll think of the times that Tessie always told him he was famous on the internet for leading the charge 12 games in a row.

And besides...14-1 isn't anything to scoff at. Every baby has hiccups...let's make it 15-1, kid.

Natalie, I just got back from vacation and was catching up on the Soxaholix and was a little freaked out to find out that you were at a wedding in Chico the same weekend I was, but based on the Cello comment it couldn't have been the one I went to on Sunday, which was a rock-n-roll affair. And we also walked around Livingston, although we went to the Sport. When I point out another Red Sox hat to our two year old, he says "mine."

Yes, Logan had a good thing going on... but like Kaz says, he had the hiccups. Honestly, I thought the streak could go on forever only because Logan is just too precious. He just seems to be a baby from a fairy tail. His Grantie is a big part of his life also, he knows she is special. You should see a newborn child smile when he hears certain peoples voices. It's completly priceless. WOrds could never describe the feeling you get. Someone told me, that newborns usually don't smile until they get older. When i was in the hospital, Logan came to visit me. For only being a week old, he had the biggest smile on his face as soon as he heard my voice. There are no words to explain the feeling, but i know love had overflowed.

Logan is going to grow up loving the RED SOX as much as his mommy loves him.

NolaSox, that's amazing! Would have been crazy if it had been the same wedding, but mine was an elegant Sat night affair, featuring a great band flown in from NYC- I recommend checking out Julian Velard on iTunes. But perhaps we passed on the streets of Livingston. Always great to see Sox fans afield!

I can't believe that Shilling and Beckett didn't make the all star team! Ozzy Guian (sp?) is so selfish picking all those players on his team!

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