The deeper the faith, the greater the reward

Susan:
Well isn't that sweet, the lil' A-Rod that could goes from goat to game winnah.

 

---

Mike:
Yes, he can once again attend the Mad Hattah's tea pahties.

 

---

Susan:
Heh, now I finally get the whole white gloves thing.

 

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Mike:
Absolutely, you don't get to call yourself a 5-toolah and the greatest playah in the game if you're not prepared. White gloves. Check. Lipstick. Check. Purse. Check. ¡Watchalo, bitches, A-Rod's in the house!

 

---

Susan:
So I guess with this win Yankees fans can regain their "mystique" and make it through the day without loosing their collective shit and pissing their pants all over the internets like what went down yestahday?

 

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Mike:
Seriously, I feel like such a mark for falling for that whole Yankees fan pride and class thing all these years. What a sham.

 

---

Susan:
Yeah, who knew the whole facade was predicated entirely on winning and narcissism.

 

---

Mike:
Yeah, forget a full fledged auto-de-fe with the flames of ignominious defeat charring your ass cheeks like we endured year after year. These soft pricks just see the sticks being piled and they're all, "Waa waa waa we lost to the Red Sox."

 

---

Comments

[Carlos]

H.B.: Some words to inspire you this morning from your favorite poet. Good luck with this mascot plan of yours!:

"The Rum Tum Tugger is a terrible bore:
When you let him in, then he wants to be out; He's always on the wrong side of every door,And as soon as he's at home, then he'd like to get about."

p.s. And Good luck with Mike Holtz, Willie Harris and Alex Gonzalez!

[Bob]

And best of luck to you, CarlTroll, with Melky and the REAL Aaron Small. Oh, and an obviously old-as-shit-broken-down Randy Johnson, a catcher even Skankee pitchers don't like pitching to, a one-steroid-test-from-50-games-off first baseman, another one-test-from-50-games-off nutcase who seems to live on the DL, a left-handed "closer" who was brought in specifically to mow down Papi but has failed in two of two attemps, and a fan base that goes into a silent movie actress faint every time you lose a game.

[h.b.]

Actually, Carlito, I don't much like Eliot. He was a crabby old bore who didn't have much fun.

And speaking of poets who didn't have much fun, but wrote some great stuff, I think this bit from our New England homegirl ties in nicely with the theme of today's strip:

I am silver and exact. I have no preconceptions/ What ever you see I swallow immediately/ Just as it is, unmisted by love or dislike./I am not cruel, only truthful--

[Jason O.]

HB, an admirable attempt at a pre-emptive strike with the ad hominem attacks. Further, no one appreciates a good cheap shot better than me.

However: Alex has taken Red Light (Jim Fregosi's, not mine) deep in 2 clutch situations over the past 2 seasons. If a "purse wearing bitch" owns you, that's not good.

I confess, I'm still a little off-put by Schill wearing jeans to that movie premiere when Shonda was looking elegant in a black dress. Come on man, put on a tie, have some respect.

[Carlos]

I have seen the best minds of my generation destroyed by baseball...
Good luck tonight, H.B.

[h.b.]

Jason,

The thing is I don't much count Schilling last year as Schilling. He should have never been out there, but I can't make those decisions.

Wasn't really trying to attack A-Rod today. You've been reading my comments long enough to remember I've been predicting A-Rod will be a Bucky Dent type spoiler for the Sox sooner or later.

And last night wasn't even it. It's still coming.

And, FWIW, I don't group you among those Yankees fans who are, well, pansies, when it comes to dealing with a loss.

But they are out there. But I don't really count them as "true" Yankees fans just as I don't count the fair weather bandwagon jumper crowd who profess their love of all things Red Sox as being true fans either.

[BB]

h.b. - great strip. Like jason said, it's a decent attempt at a pre-emptive strike. Doesn't change the fact that Schill got spanked last night. And by 'Slappy McBlue Lips' to boot. That's gotta sting. Better you than us I guess. Seeing as you guys are so good at 'enduring ignominious defeat' and all.

[Deenie]

BB: Sox/Yanks have met three times this year and the Sox have won twice.

So Schill got beat last night, your entire team blew it the night before.

Tit tat and all.

Congratulations on that first place spot. Percentage points mean everything.

[The Mirror Image of BB]

h.b. - great strip. Like BB said, it's a decent attempt at a pre-emptive strike. Doesn't change the fact that RJ got spanked the other night. And by Mark Loretta, to boot. That's gotta sting. Better you than us I guess. Seeing as you guys as so good at 'mystique and aura' and all.

[pawsoxpop]

HB, there's no way that A-Rod can be a "Bucky Dent-like spoiler" because the guy is a five-tool player with the biggest salary in baseball and an MVP under his belt. So of course he's going to hit the ball out once in awhile. So far in these head-to-head matchups, he's tied with Alex Gonzales in that department. I'm sure he will club more homers against us than A-Gon does against his team, but until he wins a World Series, he's still A-Fraud in my book. And the Skankees are welcome to him. Mussina was very good though. But he can't pitch every day, and it won't rain every day he doesn't pitch. So I'm not too worried.

Wake will get 'em tonight, and Schill will be okay. It's still only May.

[h.b.]

Pawsoxpop,

Excellent point re A-Rod compared to Bucky.

Also, AFAIK, A-Rod doesn't used a cork bat.

Heh.

The point I was trying to make though is after the whole dealio with him nearly coming to the Red Sox and then all the laughing (deservedly so) of his ball slap, that the kharma wheel will one day spin around and A-Rod will get some vindication.

But that's cool. And that's the REAL point to today's strip. Post WS win, I don't carry the anger. The rivarly is fun, great fun, but the Yankees aren't the big bad boogy man anymore.

They could win all 19 matchups during the regular season but if we had to face them in the postseason, meh, whatever. Been there. Done that.

Before you Yankees fans start firing off neanderathal comments, I'm not saying the Sox will beat the Yankees in the postseason or any other time. Only that, as a fan, facing the Yankees doesn't carry any more psychic weight than facing the White Sox or the Indians or any other club.

And losing to the Yankees, just doesn't carry the same sting. Along the same lines, beating the Yankees is still great, but it'll probably never feel as super duper unbelievably great as it did in 2004.

You can only slay Goliath once.

[IkeG]

Whatever happens tonight, I hope the Sox aren't up 2-0 in the 1st. That seems to be the kiss of death in this series.

It's annoying to me to see A-Rod and Giambi going deep, especially off Schilling, but that stuff is going to happen. Better in May, and after a Sox win, than in September and following a loss. A-Rod sure did hit that one wicked fah, I must say.

Of more concern is the apparent emergence of Scott Proctologist. He stunk it up in '05 but is looking pretty good this year. Seems to be a good replacement for Gordon Gekko. The Spanks' pen looks no worse than last year, but I'm not convinced they're better. It'll be interesting to see how Dotel 6 does when he comes back.

On the good guys' side, the bullpen has not nearly as many holes as last year. I actually feel confident when the Sox have a lead in the 5th or 6th.

[JL25and3]

Much as I hate to admit it, h.b., you've got the current generation of Yankee fans pegged all too well. I was at last night's game, and half the people in my section were on their feet every few minutes - turned around, looking up into the stands, in case there was, y'know, something exciting, like a fight or something. Never mind the goddam game on the field, which some of us actually wanted to watch.

For those of us who were going to Yankee games in 1991, and 1967, the current generation - with their narrow-minded sense of entitlement and their complete ignorance of pre-1996 baseball - is kind of embarrassing.

Which isn't to let Sox fans off the hook. You guys are genuinely insane.

[Aaron]

I understand Tito wanting to give Papelbon a taste of pitching in Yankee Stadium, but still...throwing your closer out there when you're down by four runs? What if they need him to go a couple of innings in a close game tonight?

[BB]

h.b - No neanderthal comments here. I do believe you are whistling in the dark with respect to your feelings about the rivalry. "facing the Yankees doesn;'t carry any more psychic weight than facing the White Sox or Indians" Really? Cuz I read this strip every day and I've never seen "Charlie from Chicago" or "Clyde from Cleveland" grace these pages. But "Mahty from New Yahk"? Him you have time for. Him you portray in all his stereotypical Yankee fan glory. The rivalry is special. To say otherwise is to be less than honest.

[Bob]

Okay, I am now convinced that BB is NOT Big Bri. The guy can actually string a few words together without calling mom down to the basement for a quick proof read.

[pawsoxpop]

HB I sort of agree with your sentiments about not worrying so much about the Yankees except that for somebody who works in NYC, it is actually worse to lose to the pinstripes because you get a lot of grief about it at work the next day. I have friends at work from all over the country, and the Orioles and Blue Jays fans can have a civilized conversation after a game without taunting somebody or yelling at them. Yankee fans are a lot more civil now than they were before 2004 but too many of them are still obnoxious jerks after a Yankee win. Luckily, I have the day off today so I don't have to go to work and hear it. And hopefully when I go in tomorrow it will be after a win so I won't have to hear it then either. I just wish the jerk who stole/threw away the picture from my desk of my son and me at the 2004 victory parade would return it or own up to it. But it's better than getting pelted with beer and peanuts which is why I will never go to a game at the Toilet in the Bronx. I'm pissed that the NYS tax they take out of my paycheck is going to go help build a new one though. Maybe they'll let the Sox fans in NYC push the button when they blow up the old one. That would be nice. But I think they'll probably keep it as a museum for the "mystique and aura" era that they're missing so much now that they haven't won a championship since the last century.

[Kaz]

Pre-2004 ALCS: Damnit, another 7-3 loss in May to the Yankees! OMG, fire Tito! Can't we trade Schilling for a *REAL* pitcher?!? How will we ever make the WS if we can't get by the Yankees in May!?

Post-2004 ALCS: 7-3 Yankees? Glad I missed the game because I was watching paint dry. Well, every dog has its day, I guess. We can get them tonight...either way it's 3-1 on the season record against them or 2-2...glad we play them in another week here in the Fens, should be a good series.

h.b. is right...great rivalry (and cause to dangle Mahty the Whipping Boy out in public), but the only Mystique I see on the horizon is Rebecca Romijn-Stamos in blue body paint on May 26th.

[NV in SD]

Bob- BB is most definitely Big Bitch (if you have any questions, go over to SG and see what kind of insightful commentary she's been coming up with). If BB v.2 seems less ignorant this time around, it's only because she's been stealing other people's comments and using them as her own (see her first comment, above). It's really quite sad. I'm sure her mom is very dissapointed.

[yazbread]

For all the bashing that goes on here between Sox and Yankee fans, it does not even begin to compare to the hatred that existed back in the days of neo-Nazi Billy Martin and his brown shirts. [Yes, I used to walk 6 miles to school in the snow]. Take that hostility, bring it forward to 2006, and you would have fans releasing anthrax spores in each other's stadium.

P.S. - Martin was a neo-nazi, a less than exemplary man, but had he managed the Sox, he would have brought a championship to Boston many years before Terry.

[pawsoxpop]

Amen to that, Yazbread. Actually if anybody with a primate brain had managed the Sox instead of the Gerbil, they would have reached the promised land in the 1970s. Which is why the only one happier than me to see Pedro throw him down was my own PawsoxPop Sr. "Good for Pedro," he said. "He should have kicked him too."

Actually I'm sure he wasn't the only one. Probably anyone who watched the 1970s Sox was happy to see Zimmer thrown down. Pedro only did what the rest of us wanted to do 20 years earlier. He was more responsible than Bucky Dent was for the Yankees' 1978 victory. Zimmer makes Grady Little look like Bill Bellichick.

[Ben]

Auto-de-fe? What's an auto-de-fe?

It's what you oughtn't to do, but you do anyway!

[Kaz]

Oh, I also meant to tell you, h.b.:

Damn you, Damn you, Damn you. I thought you'd found a new Bambino's Curse entry when I saw the server in the auto-de-fe link today. I thought Edw was back writing my first favorite Red Sox blog (no offense, it's just the order I found these sites in). Damn it, when I saw the blog date I was disappointed. I miss Edw's words of wisdom.

[Bob]

NV in SD; well if it is Big Lie, at least we can put a face to the name (from the Soxaholix Frappr site):

http://www.frappr.com/thesoxaholix/photo/441356

[Pond]

There are showers forecasted during the game tonight. Is there any reason for concern about Wakefield and a wet ball? One of the Yankee fans on my team mentioned it and I thought he might be playing with me, but always best to check with the experts.

[Kaz]

Pond, it's actually the other way around:

Google Search for knuckleball & damp

Including a quote from Wake before Game 1 of the 2004 WS:

Q. If the weather is the way it is today, damp, a little windy, how does that affect your knuckleball?

TIM WAKEFIELD: As long as it's not raining too bad, it should be okay. It's tough holding on to a ball with your fingertips when it could be cold and maybe a little bit dry are than it is right now. I think the humidity may help a little bit. But I think it's going to be tough conditions for both pitchers tomorrow night.

[Pond]

Thanks Kaz. I was pretty sure about that, but since I was talking completely out of my ass, I chose a tactical withdrawal over being proven wrong by a Yankee fan who claimed to pitch in high school. Wake reunited with Dougie against a hot Chacon -- should be good.

[louclinton]

A favorite movie line, from mel brooks I think.

Hey Hey Whaddya say? How do you get to the auto-de-fe?

meh

[zeke]

Right-0 & Right On!

N.E. Homegirl even helped /slash/ predicted the reverse of the damned curse.

Out damned striped ones, out.

Puppets, loosed from the stings of the puppetmaster, / Wear masks of horn to bed. / This is not death, it is something safer. / The wingy myths won't tug at us any more.

[JimmyZ]

Ben,
Love the History of the World quote...
"Send in the nuns!"

[dirtdog in ny]

Well, now maybe the mfy trolls will crawl back under their collective rocks for a while--it was a great game.