Butt seriously...

Tara:
I hate to hear about any Red Sox players hurting, of course, but I do revel in the thought of Jason Varitek's ass being an above the fold story.

 

---

Susan:
Absolutely. Any chance to discuss Tek's buttacularism makes me a very happy kitty indeed.

 

---

Tara:
Tek's is the most glorious gluteus in all mankind.

 

---

Susan:
And he aggravated it.

 

---

Tara:
Poor aggravated man flesh.

 

---

Susan:
Probably could use some deep massaging.

 

---

Tara:
All that running the ass. And crouching the ass. Runningandcrouching. Up and down. All around. Sigh …

 

---

Susan:
He is all stallion. I whinny.

 

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Comments

[Ryan with a Capital "R"]

I do believe that Tek has an assue.

[Natalie]

Thank you for this strip, h.b. *sigh* I may now need some "alone time."

I also fully plan on working the word buttacularism into my everyday vocabulary...

God, I love baseball.

[GaryGeiger]

Talk about win-win, h.b.
You write something for the ladies to get moist to, and we get to see them talking about it............

Props to Loretta.....he seems like a really good guy. Also to David for keeping us in it, and that waterbug, Youkilis for his hustle

[RedSoxNorthWestern]

Great strip today...anytime we talk about Varitek's ass, I'm all over it.

Anyone else see Surviving Grady yesterday? Over 400 posts... good golly miss molly... how do people even read that many?

[Bob]

I know they're just your characters talking, H.B., but can we PLEASE talk about Hazel Mae's ass tomorrow?

[vasoxfan]

H.B.,
Again thanks for the fun strip. The Happy Kitty Massager Link is bad. Perhaps this one?
http://www.flickr.com/photos/geishabot/27254325/
Post Deletable.

[Bob]

Jeez, check out this headline. What do you suppose this Seattle writer has on his mind?

http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/mariners/2002936616_mari18.html

[h.b.]

That's so weird that the Happy Kitty website is now down, as it was there this morning.

Even weirder is if you type "Happy Kitty" into Google, you get a paid ad/link to the website.

BTW from a previous strip, we know Susan/Circle was a beta tester for the Happy Kitty product. Unfortunately, I can't find the damn strip where this is discussed.

[lisa gray]

jeez hart

yall think us grrrrls look at ballplayers as a piece of ass?

why they are just large lil boys with a heart and a soul

lisa

- and hot asses

[lisa gray]

and i forgot

that article talkin bout how varitek got all stiff.

all stiff

hehhehheh

guess he got the situation firmly in hand

hehhehheh

gotta luuuvvvv them, uh, pointed (ahem) remarks

hehhehheh

- and whats this bout a ballplayer name hazel mae?????

[vasoxfan]

Oops, yeah sorry the link I suggested was a little more appropriate for Hello Kitty!!
Not the more effective Happy Kitty. (Not that I or my wife know the diff:))

[IkeG]

Let's throw some props to Petey for his 200th ...

[louclinton]

Nice strip, h.b. Having made my first trip to the pahk this season on Monday morning, I was damn curious why The Captain was running worse than me.

A few observations prompted by my First Visit this year: WiMP should bat left...he sure as hell isn't hitting anything righty....The Owners are doing a great job with the pahk. It's still a dump, but the most wonderful dump ever....The creepiest thing to me is that the "owner's box" is still encased in plexiglass (I hadn't caught that on TV). It looks like the smoking lounge at Hartsfield Airport for god's sake, and serves as an eeiry (sp?) reminder of the .406 club, which sucked for too many reasons to mention...How many people do you have to fuck or kill to get one of the new luxury seats? I have to get moving...Loretta rocks...I don't have any RS gear, but now I need one of those two-tone undershirts (gray on the bottom and red on the top) that he was wearing, and which showed up after he got rolled by the team at Home Plate...and for the last time, I told you so about MahkL.

Finally, how cool is it that we, the Fans, get to indoctrinate new players into the Fenway Will To Win. After his shot yesterday, MahkL was all like "It's Christmas every day of the year at Fenway!" No shit Mahk, welcome aboard.

lc

[Bob]

Yeah, congrats, Petey. However, when he said that the win was the highlight of his career, I was a little put off. I mean, isn't winning a World Series just a LITTLE bit of a bigger deal?

[NolaSox]

Feb 17th, H.B.

And thanks for the Tek ass strip...the only reason I watched the Queer Eye episode was in hopes of seeing his towel slip.

[Mike H]

Speaking for the guys in the room, I was more interested in that walkoff homer that happened yesterday than anyone's posterior.

All this talk about asses just brings me back to the fact we use them to poo, Tek included.

M

[harwich rich]

Yeah Petey,thanks for all the re$$pect

[Jason O.]

You must be at least 30 to recognize this reference, but today's strip reminded me of Dana Carvey on SNL impersonating George Michael:

"My butt is so valuable it has its own agent..."

[IkeG]

"...you cahn't deny it's power, Dennis"

[Natalie]

As a preteen I certainly could not deny the power of GM's butt. The video for Faith made us girls swoon. It wasn't until much later that we realized that he wasn't shakin' it for us... Lost some of the magnetism at that point.

Tek, on the other hand, I want to just nibble on :)

[DenverSoxFan]

h.b. is vicariously Brokeback for Varitek's ass.

Not that there's anything wrong with that.

;)

[Kaz]

If you're talking toukis, you're talking Kaplah.

Tek can't hold a flame to that....AND it's on permanent bedrest right now.

[Jeff]

Anybody see the chokeback Yankees spoof? Very funny, check it out.

http://www.kickina.com/chokeback/

(sorry if you have seen it before)

[GaryGeiger]

After the 04 WS, my then 13 yr old daughter said that if I couldn;t be her dad anymore, she want Tek to be.....

With our new, high-grade Infield defense, is it possible for Matt Clement to understand that he needs to live down in the strikezone? He doesn't strike me as the sharpest tool in the shed.

[Jennay]

h.b. thanks for the varitek "strip" today - pun intended. Even my best friend, who is a Skankees fan, has the hots for Tek.

[Bob]

Why does Friday's game in Toronto start at 1:05?

[Bob]

Hmm, in my pocket schedule, it says Friday's game starts at 1:05. But on the Red Sox web site, it says 7:07. I guess I'll go with their web site, but I wonder how many other game times are wrong on my schedule.

[Griffin]

Any female Red Sox fan would agree that Tek has the most spectacular posterier in Major League Baseball. Thanks for the acknowledgement.

[yazbread]

Per Jason O.

>You must be at least 30 to recognize >this reference, but today's strip >reminded me of Dana Carvey on SNL >impersonating George Michael:

>"My butt is so valuable it has its own >agent..."

You set the lower limit, but not the upper limit. Many of us only watched SNL during its golden years when it was actually funny. By the time Dana Carvey showed up in 1986, the show had become irrelevant to many of us. [At age 49, I must one of the older ones that read this strip].

[IkeG]

Did Wily Mo just walk twice in one game? What world am I in?

Yazbread, it's a shame that you shut out the late-80's SNL years. You missed, among other things:
- Phil Hartman as Sinatra
- Jon Lovitz as Tommy Flanagan
- Schmitt's Gay
- The Chippendale dance-off

Maybe it wasn't quite cutting edge like the Belushi days, but still freaking hilarious.

[David Pinto]

Your blonde looks like Dwight's girlfriend on The Office.