So happy together

Tara:
Not only is Manny back, but he's looking goo-ooo-ood.

 

---

Bill:
Yeah, love the lean cut, love the longah, highlighted dreads, love the beard …

 

---

Tara:
And it was mighty nice of the Globe's Cafardo to wait until the second graf of his story before turning on horror the movie trailer voice over anguish: "How long will it last?!?!!" Whoooo cue eerie tubular bells sounds.

 

---

Bill:
No kidding. And I'm not sure why Manny's "I'm here. I'm here." response to the "are you happy?" question has to be spun negatively.

 

---

Tara:
For reals. I took it totally as a "hey, if I wasn't happy I wouldn't be here" response while the media, of course, goes with the "Well, he didn't explicitly say he was happy, so let's assume the worst" approach.

 

---

Bill:
And you know what? Let's suppose Manny isn't happy. Does that really mattah? I mean I couldn't care less how much hatred he hahbahs as long as he continues to send moon shoots ovah the monstah.

 

---

Tara:
We are a culture obsessed with "being happy all the time," but the dirty little secret is it just doesn't work that way.

 

---

Bill:
Absolutely. All your self-help books, all your Dr. Phil episodes, all your Depak Chopra snake oil ain't going to change the simple fact that "happy" is the outliah and the default homeostasis of life is "meh, so so."

 

---

Tara:
Like so much in nature, our emotions follow a normal distribution. One standard deviation from the mean, or 68% of the time, is "meh, I'm not happy and I'm not sad, I'm just living."

 

---

Bill:
Sure. And then you've got feeling blue and feeling fine at 13.6% each at two standahd deviations from the mean, and, finally, at three deviations away you've got the extremes of "Holy fuck I can't take anothah day of this shit I'm going to off myself" and total blissed out nirvana one with the universe ecstasy. That's life. Deal with it.

 

---

Tara:
And I, personally, get to that three deviation positive small end of the curve whenever I see the Lost's Mr. Eko on screen shirtless and carrying a big, righteous, stick of whoop ass.

 

---

Bill:
Heh, wouldn't it be cool if Manny, instead of being goofy, went with the Mr. Eko approach when dealing with the press?

 

---

Bill:
[Imitating Eko's voice] "During the offseason, I was dragged out of my penthouse at night by two men. And I killed these men, smashing their skulls with a stone. I felt their blood on my arms …"

 

---

Tara:
Yeah, and the media are all crapping their pants like the balloon man, "W-W-Why are you telling us this, Manny?"

 

---

Bill:
[Imitating Eko's voice] "I must tell someone. I seek redemption." Then he whips out a mofo big ass blade out of his uni pants, cuts his beard off, and hands it to Shaughnessy, then turns and walks away.

 

---

Tara:
Hell yeah, that's what I'm talking about. Righteous.

 

---

Comments

[David]

Thanks for sharing your Manny dream interiew. I think I'll be snickering all day thinking of Shaunnassey holding Manny's beard. Will people know I'm insane, too?

[Scott]

It warms my heart to think of Shaunnassey standing there in piss stained pants holding one of Manny's beard dreads. I also think Shaunnassey came to the Globe in a balloon.

[i heart hb]

h.b. - Great strip, but I know you strive for perfection, and I am a stats dork, so the mass of a normal distribution that is two standard deviations from the mean is about 95%. One standard deviation from the mean is 68%.

[h.b.]

Yes, right, the one sd accounts for the 68%. Thanks for noticing. Fixed now.

[illegitimate son of dwight evans]

Way to hit the nail on the head, h.b. on all those matters.

See, I think the "I'm here, I'm here" comment was not a thinly veiled comment about his unhappiness in Boston, but rather a cunning meatball left out over the outside corner, to see what slimeballs in the media would take a hack at it. I happen to think Manny's toying with the media and their belief in their innate wag-the-dogability on the gullible public. Manny's been here long enough to know even public love-fests like Schilling's or Cabrera's from a couple years ago will still get spun against the ballplayer, so why bother trying to convince the media that you're happy? Why not present the public face of discontent in the media while the clubhouse is hunky-dory?

[h.b.]

Interesting theory re Manny, and that's also what I think Locke is doing with Henry Gale/prisoner on Lost: He's totally playing up the anger/power struggle with Jack.

[Sean O]

Last night's episode was just about the creepiest thing I've ever seen on tv. The oceanic planes, the weirdly calm Ethan, Alex helping Claire escape, the injections and screaming, Zeke's beard in the locker, the flickering lights in that creepy-ass hatch... Damn.

I gotta admit, I wussed out when Eko started moving that knife to his throat, mainly because he's my favorite character. Eko is definitely trying to creep Gale the fuck out.

I love this show.

[COD]

Yeah, Lost got its mojo back last night, for sure. I followed that up with Friday's Battlestar Galactica, which may have been one of the better hours of TV ever produced. I was one happy consumer of televised sci-fi drama last night.

[Jennay]

Great soxaholix & great episode of Lost!! Does life get any better?!

[Scott]

Not that this has to do with anything, but this line cracked me up. Via the Brushback:
"The Orioles acquired Kevin Millar in the offseason, who's a good clubhouse guy. It’s when he leaves the clubhouse that things fall apart."

[vasoxfan]

finally, at three deviations away you've got the extremes of "Holy fuck I can't take anothah day of this shit I'm going to off myself.

The way I feel somedays with no Soxaholix to look forward to. :)

Great Strip H.B.

[manny's the man]

Who CARES what Manny says? He's so damn hot in that photo on the front page of today's Globe.

[louclinton]

I've been in the Bay Area this week, and I have to say it gave me some fresh persoective on RSN. The Gints and the DollarBeerNight A's haven't won sqwat in years, but you'd think that they were selling tickets to the BART subway series already. If you think Manny's act is tired, try seeing walltowall Barry Abdul video. Four hours of sports talk radio in the morning about famous cinematic crossdressers makes you long for Eddite Andelman. Actually, no.

MR24 Out!

[Jason O.]

Come on people....Ramirez's beard makes him look like an Afro-caribbean Ben Roethlisberger. If you can't grow a uniform beard, spare us!

The discomfort of watching Ramirez's strange facial hair was compounded because Hazel Mae was off last night and not unleashing her deck guns on NESN....damn.

[h.b.]

If you can't grow a uniform beard, spare us!

Mr Eko doesn't have a uniform beard, either, and nobody fucks with Mr. Eko!

Meanwhile, in my own experience, the guys with the "uniform beards" tend to be pasty white guys in tweed jackets speaking limply of Foucault and Derrida.

I'll take Eko and Manny any day over the testosterone challenged professoriate crowd.

But, hey, that's just me.

[Devine]

Manny back...great! Manny in the best shape of his career (so he says, and he *does* look pretty good), with more tenable hamstrings, and on a mission to cement his place in the pantheon of great players...bring on the effing season!

Good strip today, too, h.b. I always wonder if I'm spoiling future enjoyment if I ever decide to watch Lost, but I'll take that risk.

Actually, h.b., this whole week has been really stand-out on overall quality. Thanks for the entertainment!

And nolasox, you here? Who you think's got it on Project Runway next week? Based on the clothes as they look on the rack, for me it's *begrudgingly* Santino. Sadly, I will miss next week's final episode and have to watch it five days later. Just another case of life within one standard deviation.

[Deepsub]

Yeah, really missed Hazel last night on NESN. Maybe she was still recovering from the "Whiney Awards" the other night. heh One night last year a buddy of mine and I went to the Cask and Flagon after a game and Hazel was there with the NESN crew. Bullshitted with her for about ten minutes or so, pretty down to earth (and oh yeah, pretty hot).
BTW is anyone else completely fucking DONE with Damon's attempts to torpedo the Sox' chemistry?? "Manny wants out of Boston" etc, dude you and Bode Miller can just live together on an island and break out the microphones, blab yourselves to death.... but hey that's just me.
Good strip h.b., great week.