It's Hard out Here for a Pimp

Lisa the Temp:
Hi, Lisa the Temp here to tell you The Soxaholix are taking the day off in order to track down their identities.

 

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Lisa the Temp:
So did you see your former cult hero Johnny Damon got himself a new ride?

 

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Lisa the Temp:
A Ferrari is nice and all, but if Johnny really wants to some A-List celebrity athlete street cred, he's got to crunk the fur action.

 

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Lisa the Temp:
I mean Johnny already has the ho part covered.

 

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Comments

[Babe Silverstein]

Lisa The Temp emerged from her den this morning and saw her shadow. You know what that means -- six more weeks until Johnny Big Apples launches his primetime show, "Dancing With The Damon."

J-Dam's swag Ferrari runs on an experimental brand of ethanol, which is 10% gasoline, 30% grain alcohol, and 60% David Wells urine.

[metal circus]

Hey Johnny:

Hope you crash head-on into a telephone pole at 90 MPH with that stupid Ferrari while A-Rod gives you roadhead, you arrogant, materalistic bastard.

Puma can go to hell as well - wonder how many sweatshops are going to be working overtime to pay for those wheels?

[louclinton]

Yo, yo ma n***a.

JD gots to get da switchgrass-powered ride.

[illegitimate son of dwight evans]

The soxaholix outed themselves as Globe subscribers. This seems to run contrary to their regular arguments about how the snickering dead-tree media is digging its grave these days.

[louclinton]

Maybe h.b. subscribes to the Worcester paper

[h.b.]

The soxaholix outed themselves as Globe subscribers.

Tell me you don't believe what Lisa the Temp says? I mean she's the frickin' temp. :)

[yazbread]

Kobe, you're no Clyde Frazier. You do not carry that fur well.

[Jason O.]

Did you see the comment on that site? "It looks like Kobe stole David Puddy's coat"...fantastic...

Johnny should have pushed Puma for the new SuperAmerica...have you seen that thing?

However, if Chrysler group makes the Challenger Hemi that was just at the Detroit auto show, I will wet myself, then get one, then wet it. It will immediately be the coolest car in the United States.

[NV in SD]

"da switchgrass-powered ride"

Ahh, I see you also caught the Daily Show last night lou. I think I have a few of those switchgrass engines left over from college...

IMHO, Jay, the Camaro concept is was slicker than the Challenger.

[NV in SD]

"da switchgrass-powered ride"

Ahh, I see you also caught the Daily Show last night lou. I think I have a few of those switchgrass engines left over from college...

IMHO, Jay, the Camaro concept is way slicker than the Challenger.

[NV in SD]

my bad on the DP- coffee jitters.

[DenverSoxFan]

It's Thursday, so...

I'm getting really fucking tired of Lost's habit of two new episodes, three reruns, two new episodes, three reruns. You know what? Do what The Sopranos is doing: make episodes until you have 13 that you can actually string back-to-back, no matter how long the wait, and show them all at once.

[h.b.]

I'm getting really fucking tired of Lost's habit of two new episodes,
three reruns, two new episodes, three reruns

Blame "sweeps week" or rather network tv's obsession with it. They have to hold back enough episodes during the year to insure they wrap up during the all important May sweeps.

Sucks.

That's why I'm more and more feeling it's better to just wait for the DVD release of TV shows then you can just go nuts and watch as many as you want in a row.

[Kaz]

Be careful what you ask for. Two shows, three reruns would be a good method for getting off the "switch grass".

I enjoy a half-hour anime called "Full Metal Alchemist" on Adult Swim on Cartoon Network. It's an English translation of an already-made Japanese cartoon. They show one half-hour every weekend and you know each one is new. The story is so well written that it's like a heroin withdrawal waiting for each new episode during the week. h.b. has the right idea (if TV DVDs weren't so freakishly expensive)...if you want to see new episode after new episode, best to blow your whole load on a Saturday afternoon with the full season DVD than pray for each week to finally fall off the calendar to see just another tidbit more of the story.

[Ice Princess]

Ah... Lisa just called Michelle a ho! I frickin' love it!

My secret hope is that all this Yankerism is going to truly test their 'incredible bond'. They'll be divorced in a year, she'll have his 26 million, & he won't be able to hit for shit because his head will be more fuzzy than after his Oakland owie.

I mean, how the F do you form an incredible bond with a stripper?

[Devine]

Watching TV on DVD is the only way to go. I love getting obsessed for a weekend and cramming an entire season of programming down my throat.

That said, I am utterly obsessed with the current season of Project Runway right now and am merely marking time until the next episode. (Hey, it's one way to get to April...although I think I might actually enjoy the WBC coverage I can get from MLB.TV and ESPN, so maybe I just have to get to March to enjoy baseball again.)

[Natalie]

Speaking of Johnny Damon, anyone see The Beast's list of the 50 Most Loathsome People- Johnny ranks #33:

33. Johnny Damon

Charges: Any baseball player with highlights in his hair should be faced with the same penalty system applied to those using performance-enhancing steroids. It’s ruining the game. And if a ball player is going to grow a beard, it should be a Charlie Manson/Thurman Munson scraggle of bushy whiskers, not a neatly manicured and softly conditioned frame for your pretty face. The only thing that got Damon to step into line and quit hair-farming was a 52 million dollar check from the New York Yankees. Boston prayed for the multi-bladed Gillette that officially made him a Yankee to slip while gliding over his Adam’s apple and spill his lifeblood into the bathroom sink.

Exhibit A: Going from the Red Sox to the Yankees is like fucking the guy that murdered your husband.

Sentence: Killed by barrage of hurled D cell batteries when he takes the field at Fenway next season.

For the full list: http://www.buffalobeast.com/91/50.htm (Sorry don't know how to do that snazzy hyperlink thing you all have down pat)

[NolaSox]

Devine, I'm with you on PJ. Santino is hilarious, although his resemblence to Rasputin is a little offputting...the whole Andrae and Tim having love spats at Red Lobster was great. Why did Andrae looked so shocked when he got booted, didn't he see that he had just sent doormats down the runway.

[louclinton]

actually, I didn't see TDS last night. Just picking up on one of those haiku's yesterday with a callback to President Dumbo's speechifying

[Robert (00:05)]

so a couple of things to add my thoughts to; David Wells pee as a fossil fuel alternative, it would stop me siphoning your gas tank. Lost and the release schedule, you should try living this side of the pond, they only set sale on the crazy raft a couple of weeks ago. I heard they made a second series of 24... And finally 'an incredible bond with a stripper' well it works for me, hanging out were your girlfriend works is way better than if she worked at starbucks.

[Jason O.]

Good point NV, the camaro is a bad mutha(shut your mouth)....and the small block chevrolet V-8 is a torque monster.

[Devine]

Nola, I thought Andrae's outfit would have been perfectly fine another week. Fit badly and a little too plain, but very Audrey Hepburn as the judges noted (and it DID look like a doormat). I just think this week's crop of outfits was insanely strong (after a couple of weeks where I was only impressed by about two contestants). I really *liked* Nick's garden outfit, so I don't know what was up with the judges, but hey, they're the fashion experts.

Santino...the brilliance of this season has been how much they made me hate him early in the show and how the editing has contrived to now make me think of him as clever and a little less egotistical than he was.

You got a pick to win, Nola? I definitely want both Daniel and Chloe in the final. I think my choice for winner is Chloe. Steady, solid work and a generally good attitude (and it doesn't hurt that I think she's hot). But I wouldn't be unhappy with Daniel. Nick is my dark horse.

[NolaSox]

Devine, Chloe and Daniel are great, Chloe is more wearable and therefore marketable to the general public. Santino could work for some wacked out Haute Couture house. The problem with Nick's dress IMO was the baby's breath coming out the the crotch area. No woman would want a real bush there. I think he is the next to go. Kara won't make it to the final three.

It's a good thing we don't get rid of Sox players for their style otherwise most of my favorites would be hearing Heidi say Auf Wiedersehen.