I will not be numbered like a slave to Selig.

An already horrible idea has resurfaced and becomes even more horrible …

Doug:
Poor wretched Little Sister Solange Rockett. At 89 years old, after a life of service to the poor and die hard devotion to the Boston Red Sox, she passed yesterday one day before the official Red Sox Nation ID number could be assigned to her.

 

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Bill:
"She had a great love for God, the church, the congregation and the Red Sox," said Mother Celine Therese. But she doesn't have an ID card, so MLB could give a rat's ass. She's a nobody. Just another worm eaten corpse now.

 

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Doug:
You know how it fucking goes, "Render unto MLB what is MLB's, and render unto God what is God's."

 

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Bill:
The wicked irony, of course, is that for all of our collective angst when this idea was floated a month ago, the price of rendering went from $5 to $9.95.

 

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Doug:
This is the most heinous sumptuary tax placed upon us since King George tried to fuck with our stamps and tea. And you know how that turned out.

 

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Bill:
If only we could dress up like Indians, raid King Selig's warehouse where these rinky bits of plastic are stored and dump the lot of them into the mofo hahbah!

 

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Doug:
I am a Red Sox fan. I will not be numbered like a slave to Selig.

 

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Bill:
There is no retreat but in submission and slavery! Our chains are forged! Their clanking may be heard on the plains of Boston!

 

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Comments

[da kine]

Although it does raise my bile, I can't get that worked up over this. Will anyone say you're not a true fan if you don't get the Mark of the Beast? Let the paht-timer bandwagon jumpers buy this stuff to show their "allegiance". I'll spend my money over at Sully's Tees or something.

[Tom Hadley]

In the list of perks that come with membership "the coolest seats at fenway" is mentioned. Does that mean you get access to the new RED SOX NATION CARD HOLDERS ONLY picnic tables in the centerfield concourse ?

[loosah]

From what it looks like, the card has a few upsides, including free membership to MLB Gameday Audio ($15 regularly), which is good for a person like me who cannot get WEEI on his car radio, and priority seats at Fenway. I still think it's a stupid deal, because there will be all the bandwagon fans who will get them to show them off to their friends, and the real fans will just scoff at them (both cards and fans) because "they aren't true fans, they just have the ID cahd".

[h.b.]

What gets me "worked up over it" is that I interpret as kind of making fun of the notion of Red Sox Nation. It's like buying a Happy Meal at McDonald's and getting the free Red Sox toy.

Also, why isn't there a membership card for Yankees fans? Do they think only Red Sox fans are stupid/cheesy enough to fall for such a lame gimmick?

It makes me feel like they think we are a bunch of suckers.

It reeks of so much of the other cheap crap you see out there that try to commodify and capture a way of life. You know like the "cute" little lobster traps you can buy for your nick nack shelf. What's the fucking point of that? It makes a mockery of lobsterman's way of life.

I despise anything that cheapens the history and special qualities of the region, be it these Red Sox ID cards or lobster rolls being sold at McDonalds.

[Devon McGettrick]

This is suck a load of BULLSHIT!!! Just another way to make a buck off of the Sox world series victory. The MLB is the scum of the earth.

[Erik]

Y'know, it's worth it just for the 2005 Gameday Audio. Yeah, big deal for those of you in Boston, but for us displaced fans who can't even get the Sox on TV without paying through the nose, $10 to listen to the Sox online all year is an incredibly good deal.

Would you rather this, which actually comes with a perk that's worth the $10, or a $220 Red Sox Putter, or an $800 Red Sox Bed. C'mon, guys. Pick your frickin' battles.

[h.b.]

Erik,

I'll PayPal you $5 friggin' dollars if you're that hard up for cash. :)

[Kluv]

Well, the Yankees DO have their own version -- a meatier package for $26...

I understand the anger, but these "ID Cards" only have as much legitimacy as we choose to give them. It's a Fan Club, a Discount Card, whatever you want to call it. I'll take the discount on the audio, use whatever ticket access they provide, and put the damn card in a box in the closet, never to be seen again.

...Until, of course, when I'm a grandfather and decide to show my grandkids that I was a "founding member" of the Red Sox Nation... ;-)

(Now to try and scrounge up the cash for that Red Sox Bed...)

[JB]

//It reeks of so much of the other cheap crap you see out there that try to commodify and capture a way of life.//

hb, you said it perfectly. I'm not going to protest in front of Fenway because of this, but I am disappointed. You can't give me an ID card to tell me that now I'm a fan. Would that same card have given me one ounce of solace after 2003? No. I cried into my tattered Sox hat. Eh, whatever. We're the new underground RSN. Rebels!

[Steve Brady]

The Sox have won the World Series, and now they are marking us with numbers. Yes, it is clearly the End of Days.

Come on, what's the big deal? Pretend you're a five-year-old, without all the baggage. It's cute. You get to carry it around in your little wallet.

[Georgie]

What I don't get, is how is this that much different from the oodles of t-shirts, pins, and other crap that they've been hawking all year saying "Red Sox Nation"? Where was the outrage over those?

[h.b.]

Hmm...
Is there any difference between a county fair in some New England town where lots of small time folks are trying to make a buck peddling candy apples, fried dough, and assorted trinkets, and Wal Mart coming into the same town selling their own wares? I think there is. And I think this is what is going on here.

Another parallel can be found in the web itself. Look at a site like Boston Dirt Dogs. That's a homegrown affair. Even now that it's owned by Boston.com it's still vastly different than, say, MLB coming out with a "Red Sox Nation blog" authored by someone under the employ of MLB. DirtDogs (and all the other Red Sox blogs) are the real thing, whereas an MLB version would be a fraud.

Hey, which DVD is better? The MLB version or the NESN version? Why? The answer is at the root of why this ID card pisses me off.

[da kine]

Alright. I smell you now. I still can't get that pissed off, though, because I'll never own one and I'll mock anyone who does. But isn't the corporate viewpoint of the management one of the primary reasons the team was successful? Isn't this a symptom of the very essence of why Lucchino/Henry/Theo et al. have a world championship team? It was cold as hell to get rid of Nomah and flew in the face of our sentimentalism, but it was a calculated decision that paid massive dividends. It takes a corporate type who sees the bottom line to make something like that happen. This is one more way to make money.

[DaveL]

I would like to see an official Red Sox
Fenway scalper discount card which
gets you a discount off regularly scalped
prices. All proceeds will go to cover
medical expenses for the people that the
Fenway scalpers punch or shake down during
the season ;)

BTW: new here but love the site, laughing
my ass off..

[h.b.]

"This is one more way to make money."

True, you bring up good points. Still just doesn't feel right to me. I could be wrong, but this doesn't sound like the brainchild of Lucchinno et al, but is just MLB corporate making the call.

And there are so many other ways to do this. Calling it an "ID card" carries all sort of linguistic/symbolic baggage. If it were just a Red Sox Fan Discount Card that'd be one thing.

Plus, this doesn't seem at all specifically marketed to kids. Not at all. If it were, that'd also be different.

[Kluv]

I totally can see all of your points, and can understand to an extent why it would offend some. But, I can't help but look at all the World Series Schwag and feel that the WS Champs Welcome Mat ($40), WS Champs Tube Sox ($15), WS Champs Tan Leather Black Binded Check Book Cover ($30), or the WS Champs Tan Clinger Monkey ($15) are all in the same vein, to make the cash. Just like the Official Red Sox Nation T-shirt they've been selling this season, which I chose not to buy (and didn't feel any less of a member of the RSN).

T-shirts and cards and chachkis don't make my identity (I go to Hot Topic for that), but I'm cool with whatever anyone wants to buy, as long as a good product continues to be put on the field.

Just out of curiousity, would anyone object to the card if is was a special "Commemorative World Series Champs Souvenir Card" for $10, with the same benefits?

[Kluv]

EDIT: Just saw your last post, h.b., I agree that it would be more palatable if it were a "Fan Discount Card". But from their standpoint, it's exactly that linguistic/symbolic baggage that their banking on to sell more than a "Discount Card" would. Sad, but probably true.

[Kluv]

EDIT EDIT: "THEY'RE banking on...", not "their". Crap. With bad grammar, perhaps I won't get into the Nation.

[mr. blackandwhite]

If you read all the way down to the bottom of the offer you'll see this:

"You already are a proud member of Red Sox Nation if you are reading this, so you might as well {shell out some cash and} make it official."

That made me feel so much better.

Mr. Oversensitive

[Sam]

"This is the most heinous sumptuary tax placed upon us since King George tried to fuck with our stamps and tea. And you know how that turned out."

Fucking brilliant analogy.

[Empyreal]

If this card is my ticket out of the dreaded Virtual Waiting Room, I'm there! Also, this is the result of having the smallest venue in the bigs.

[Elliott]

Putting aside the red flag my ingrained revulsion toward membership and authority raises, I have these thoughts:

1. This is life in America today: I am going to pay five dollars extra for Gameday Audio next year so that I get one less piece of plastic shit in my life.

2. Marketers get people to pay ten bucks for their inclusion on a list of suckers to be bombarded with junk mail, phone calls, and spam. That is a championship-caliber play.

[joey]

Shit!! I can't believe there's 22 posts. Damn, H.B., I'm sorry I have nothing to say about this...I feel kinda stupid.

[mobosox]

Screw the gameday audio...I want the full video of all the games. That would be worth the 10 dollars.

[mr. blackandwhite]

If you want the video you need to get MLB All Acce$$. Sox games are blacked out though in the New England region.. I think you can trick it by changing your zip to another city in the Win Media Player though...

Whatevah...

[loosah]

How much is MLB All Access? Because I have NFL Field Pass (in order to get out-of-market football because, let's face it, watching the NFC West each week like I have to do sucks) and it costs $35, and I don't mind because I can watch the Pack and Chiefs and Steelers each week and don't have to pay for DirecTV to get NFL Sunday Ticket. I would want to watch NESN every game, listen to RemDawg and Dirty Water instead of Tim McCarver and the stupid Fox sound effects, without having to pay over $200.

[Johnny]

I love the Patrick Henry references. The Red Sox are as deeply ingrained into Boston and New England history as our Patriots (not the ones in Foxboro, the guys with the powdered wigs). While originally in the "what's the big deal" camp, I now see this for what it is an attempt to dumb down Red Sox Nation and take advantage of us.

[mr. blackandwhite]

I think MLB All Acce$$ is $20.00. At least that's what it was last year. Just plays in Windows Media Player or Real. It's not something you would want to watch on TV but on a computer it's 'ok' if you have high-speed access.

Mr. Techno-Wizard

[loosah]

It seems that there is a good amount of support to it on SoSH, as many of the members there think that the $5 discount on Gameday Audio and the merchandise discount are reasons enough to get the card. I'm stil kind of split on it: the Gameday Audio is an excellent deal for people who don't live in New England, but the whole "Citizenship Card" idea strikes me as hokey and fake, like buying a "Bort" license plate to put on your bike saying that you live at Itchy and Scratchy Land.

[Fred Durst]

Well since SoSH is John Henry kiss ass central, those lemmings will go for anything that will get him to post there twice a year. They know where they're bread is buttered.

[Kluv]

I would give my left nut for a "Bort" licence plate. Swear to God.

[Mikey T's]

I gotta say, this idea makes me throw up in my mouth. Here's an analogy: Red Sox Nation is a little like France in 1940. Apparently, MLB just took over RSN like the Nazis took over France and we never saw it coming. We need to form the RSN Resistance (RSNR)! Heil Bud? Never!

[blackfranziskaner]

Hey... for us away fans, just look at this as a way to get gameday audio for a $5.00 discount. Throw away the card if you want, but when living on the west coast when most Sox games start at 4pm when you're still at work and can't go to the sports bar, the gameday audio is a necessity.

[inDC]

Wish I knew about it BEFORE paying $15 for gameday audio- that blows! The EEI streaming sucks now!??? Anyone else notice the cut out when no one talking... some kinda new buffering which sounds like ass.

[Eubene]

Is there any way I can watch NESN on the internet? Please help.