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Curse of the Little Rookies

The Red Sox get beat by the Devil Rays and cool heads struggle to prevail …

Bill:
So Pedro says we need to tip our caps and "give credit to the little rookie" who kicked their collective Red Sox arses.

 

Mike:
Yeah, I'm so sure Kazmir is feeling particularly diminutive right now after allowing just three hits and no runs against the Sox.

 

Bill:
No, shit. If that's the way the little Kazmir pitches, what the fuck is the big one going to be like? [Laughs]

 

Mike:
What are the Red Sox now oh-fer-six against rookie pitchers this year?

 

Bill:
Fuck yeah when seeing them for the first time they are. And as that ho bitch Lady Luck would have it, the Spanks will be sending out rookie Brad Halsey to face Pedro on Sunday … No word on whether Halsey's little or not.

 

Mike:
And Mueller and his .412 average against New York may be out after reinjuring his bum knee.

 

Bill:
Christ and just when I thought it was safe to allow myself around sharp objects and miscellaneous household items that could be used for self-immolation …

 

Mike:
You know, the impact of self-immolation cannot be overstated.

 

Bill:
Yeah, surprised we don't see more of that shit. These days it's all suicide bomber this and suicide bomber that. Nobody's got the balls for a good ol' human torch anymore.

 

Comments

h.b., are you one of the cool heads that is struggling to prevail? Panic is contagious, you know. Now I'm clutching my lighter in my hot little hand ready to flick at a moment's notice.

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