Who wants to cuddle?

The Red Sox rally to beat the Devil Rays …

Bill:
Hello, Dr. Kevorkian's office? Yes, this is Bill Callaghan, I need to cancel, or rather postpone, my scheduled assisted suicide. … No, no, don't take me off your mailing list …

 

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Doug:
A two-out rally in the sixth leading to five runs? I forgot such a thing was fucking possible.

 

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Bill:
Heh. And does Charles Bronson Arroyo give righties a death wish or what?

 

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Doug:
The dude Bronson is ice. Good quality to have in these parts. Did you read that bit from Gammo about the anonymous agent's anethma to signing players "east of the Mississippi or north of the Mason-Dixon Line"?

 

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Bill:
Yeah, welcome to Oz, Toto. [Laughs] Though, you know, I've always wondered if it's really that bad playing in New York? Remove the old dink Steinbrenner from the picture and what have you got? A city of 8 million where 9 out of 10 people could really give a shit about the Yankees? Where the majority have never even heard of Derek Jeter?

 

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Doug:
Yeah, New Yorkers have so many other diversions and perversions … like cuddle parties for instance.

 

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Bill:
Yeah, while we're up heah dying and shit over the Red Sox, New Yankers are getting pop tents in their p.j.'s while casually molesting, er, I mean communicating with perfect strangers as a supposed form of relaxation.

 

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Doug:
Yeah, that's whacked. Would nevah fly in Boston. I'd be all in my Nomar pajamas and shit, getting a good grope on with some Southie chick in one hand and while in my other hand I'd be dialing up my celly to check the scoreboard.

 

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Bill:
Yeah, and the Southie chick'd be doing the same fucking thing.

 

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Doug:
Fuck relaxation, anyway. That shit is way overrated. Give me up tight maniacal anxiety and untoward compulsion any day of the week.

 

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Comments

[joey]

HaaaaaaaaaHa! Nomar pajamas! That's fucking funny. Stuck-up Nomar probably wears Nomar pajamas too!

[steve]

Cuddle parties?? As if that city wasn't weird enough.

[GordoMac]

What do Nomar pajamas look like? :)

[Dan]

Hilarious.

[h.b.]

What do Nomar pajamas look like? :)

Sort of like this with a number 5 on them.

[Da Kine]

I had a 'cuddle pahty' with two girls from Revere one time. I almost poked my eye out on their aquanet-stiffened bangs.

[Steinbrenner Killed Kennedy]

I have a pair of Nomar PJ's. Like their namesake, they keep the balls behind you. The sleeves also have to be tugged on every .0781 seconds. Since I've been wearing them I've shut out my family, my friends and I've developed a strange attraction for A-sexual appearing women. I also found out that while sleepwalking, I went to the closest soccer field. I kicked a soccer ball around for a while until I hurt my foot. Then I limped into work and I told my boss I hurt it there. Fucking boss. He tried to hire a temp last winter to do my job. First compant that shows any interest in me can have me.