Fantasize a little

Last night's game defined the phrase "nail biter" as the Sox squandered a 7-1 lead and had to rely on 10th inning heroics, notably some bad ass base running from the humble hippie …

Doug:
Holy mother of Jesus that was a pissah … I'm spent but could go again that's how satisfying a win that was.

 

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Susan/Circle:
Schilling says it was "probably a better way to win than going out and winning, 7-0," and I think he's right.

 

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Doug:
How can those fuck wad politicos even dare discuss who among them has the better hair when on this sweet earth Johnny Damon walks …

 

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Susan/Circle:
You mean when Johnny Damon runs … Run, Johnny, Run. See Johnny run quick as a swift brown fox … and by fox I mean fox like a man, like fur zippersbeercans and the sweet hair of groaning … I want to make Johnny babies, be Magdalene to his Jesus …

 

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Doug:
Please stop before I have to report you for creating a hostile fucking sexed up working environment. [Laughs] Speaking of, I'm now going to have to remove Jessica Alba from my masturbatory lineup. The bitch is humping Jetah.

 

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Susan/Circle:
That beady eyed shit is getting the Honey? What fucking evah. Dark Angel can have him. The pinstriped prick is but another who doesn't pass my oxygen test. [Laughs]

 

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Doug:
How come the Red Sox nevah date the hot bitches?

 

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Susan/Circle:
Well, there's Nomar and Mia.

 

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Doug:
Oh, for fuck's sake. No offense but kissing Mia would be like kissing your own sister … she's a role model for young women, but not a roll model for blueballed, acne pocked teenage boys popping an errant throbbah. [Laughs]

 

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Susan/Circle:
Well, let's get the motherfucking priorities straight. First the World Series bling bling, then pimp up da ho's and bitches.

 

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Author's Notes
Circle's 'zipperbeercans' simile comes from the Lyn Lifshin poem "Nice"

Comments

[El Guapo's Ghost]

After Damon dumped his wife, he has gone with some hotties.

[h.b.]

Names links and pics, please. And non celebrity hotties don't count. Must be gossip column A-lst types. Unless they're strippers. Strippers always count. Where's big Mo when we need him.

[BA]

I believe big Mo can be found on a regular basis at the Foxy Lady in Providence

[h.b.]

You forgot the link! :)

Foxy Lady

[Da Kine]

I'd like to thank the Mass SJC for ruling in favor of gay marriage. Now I can fully pursue my hetero-crush of Johnny Damon to its inevitable conclusion.