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Day one

In a group of Soxaholix, a woman speaks:
And so, just like that, the Mayan long count calendar begins anew.

 

In a group of Soxaholix, a woman speaks:
Who the fuck saw that coming?

 

In a group of Soxaholix, a woman speaks:
Anyway, the office will be closing at noon for the holiday whose name HR doesn't permit me to utter.

 

In a group of Soxaholix, a woman speaks:
And remember, Ted, when you're at the titty bar this afternoon, the VIP room is an attempt to separate you from your bonus and Destiny doesn't really think you're hot.

 

In a group of Soxaholix, a woman speaks:
Am I right or am I right?

 

Comments

I got a bonus? We did! No Xmas tree til Monday!

lc

I got this text from my wife in FL a few minutes ago.

"We are on our way to Shoe Carnival"

So much for my bonus...

I refer to my wife's MacBook Air as the "shoe acquisition thin client." The only thing I ever see on her screen are shoes she is either about to purchase or has just purchased.

I'm not counting this chicken until it's midnight on Attu...

Why are my lights flickering? I see fires in the distance.Aaaaaaaaaaarhhhh

That said, SDU's commentary last night reminds me of one of the early scenes in the old Matthew Broderick movie War Games - "we're still here!"

Now it's on to the Sword of God Brotherhood's 2017 doomsday date, and let's win there.

WarGames. Completely unbelievable. End of the world is at hand and David didn't even think about getting Jennifer to put out.

Shoes are awesome. My black peep toe Louboutins are a prized possession (bought with bonus money three years ago). I also had an amazing pair of Dolce and Gabbana red strappy stilettos but last spring my dog walker left another dog in my apt with Tess and the shoes were out.... needless to say, they didn't survive the day. I still mourn.

Apropo of nothing, "A New York man known for his unusually large penis was patted down by airport security at San Francisco International last week after they questioned him about the bulge in his pants". I was in SF last week, but sadly, the security folks didn't glance in direction...

@steve in MD, where in NY does he live, did the article say? I'm asking, uh, for a friend.... :)

Nat-

It ain't on the left side of the infield

Nat, the only info I can offer is Jonah Falcon, age 41. Good luck to your "friend" on her search...

I confess to mourning for lost clothes, especially when the loss is my own shortsightedness.


Here's my sad tale. I did a stint working at Filene's Basement. As such I got my hands on a lot of clothes at drastically reduced prices and I could generally buy and intercept things before they hit the sales floor.


Among said interceptions were a half dozen or so Armani couture wool sport coats. OMG the most amazing jackets. These were retailing at $2500ish but I got them for like $150.


So time goes on, I age, gain some weight and one day the Armani's no longer fit. Still they are fucking Armani couture! And that stuff never goes out of style. So I keep them. And keep them.


As it goes, in our last big move, several years ago, I finally decided to part ways with them. But I was too stupid to think about selling on eBay and I just took them to the Salvation Army.


But I made peace with that.


But what is driving me totally nuts is that I've since shed all that weight and those Armani's would fit me perfectly!


It's killing me people. Seriously. I think about it every damn day. Those Armani's are my Rosebud.

Louboutins? Ok. I was curious. I googled. I am thankful for a wife who hates to shop.

Yeah. Louboutins are expensive as FUCK. But it's worth it for the moment when an entire bus full of women en route to a wedding in Florence, Italy gather 'round to admire. Oh, and men dig them too. They are hot as hell, those shoes.

But yazbread, it's not about hating to shop. I hate to shop, myself. Seriously. Basic clothes shopping I do like 2x per year. But when I shop for real, I break the bank. Buy shoes once per year: get Louboutins, Ferragamos or Dolces. Go without a watch for a decade: buy a Rolex. Haven't had a car in 5 years, this spring: buy a BMW (or an Audi Q5, I am open to suggestions). What I lack in volume I make up in price tag. It's a sickness.

I vaguely know there's a difference, but in my world, Louboutins and Lululemons are the same people, I.e. people I will never meet.

Unfashionably,

Lc

Lululemons are very fashionable yoga clothes. Love them too. I wore one of their shirts last night on my Central Park run. As I said: price tag, not volume.

Mrs sdu says the red soles are what makes 'em special. I just like the heels. The Mayans knew nothing about shoes.

Egads! The shoe fetishists are running hot and heavy. I see shoes as necessary to keep my feet warm, dry and uninfected.
Me? I want Cody Ross back in right in 2013. Hmmm... UPS truck! UK return /origin...
Hot damn! Mr. Walker's here! He's in his premium black label. Thank you, sister in creepiness. The Black Label is not the one they sell here, one can get it only in the UK to be the real deal.
Laughing all the way through a Merry Holiday Season, Brothers and Sisters in creepiness! El Commendante

Ditto Commendante

And here's hoping Santa remembered the Real Doll this time...in a teal dress...and maybe some starting pitching. Not much to ask for.
Have a great one all you creepy people.

In my porn writing days, I could have written some good scripts for Mr. Falcon. "Friday the 13th Inch" would match hockey-masked Jason against Jonah (who would have a similar mask for his schlong). The "climax" would be the same as every Friday the 13th movie: an impalement.


Well, time for me to go. Have a great weekend and Christmas and holidays, all. Hopefully we'll have something fun to yak about on Monday. Or Thursday, in my case.

56mil for Swisher . . . talk about a Christmas gift. From down in the swamps of Jersey I wish all of you to have a great one, whatever you celebrate.

Merry Christmas creeps. Or whatever it is you choose to celebrate. Or not.

Bravo, LC. Really great. You'll have to re-post later in the week when people are back.


“Oh, that was just mean, you were being so nice!”


That made egg nog shoot out of my nose.

So I boot up the cpu to wish everyone a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year, and up pops Breaking News - some fucking idiot in upstate NY lured volunteer fire fighters to a house fire, and then started shooting them. WTF is wrong with people?

got off the plane from Phily to West Palm in my Dirty Nelly's t-shirt. No pat-down but a bunch of "Say hello to Bob" in the echoes background.

Merry Christmas to all creepy denizens on this site. And special thanks to hb for another year of excellence. We wouldn't have made it through the Veet season without you.

Merry Christmas.one and all

The Flag is hoisted lc (metaphysically anyways). The 9 y/o 'Sox fan got a cello, a Wii-U (or a U-Wii); mrs sdu a nice suit and I got a cashmere cardigan for chilly nights in Japan and norther Vietnam (we leave in two days - YAY!).


Merry Christmas (or whatever) to you'all!! And many thanks to hb who didn't hang up the cleats. Yay, double plus.


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