Nice try, Paps, but it's gonna take a lot more than that to push my proverbial buttons.
Seriously, if I let every lowah primate goad me, I wouldn't be able to walk by the monkey cages at the zoo without a hand full of my own feces at the ready.
And talk about totally misunderstanding the magnanimity of Red Sox fans... so a guy throws his prosthetic leg into the bullpen? Hasn't Paps every heard the good luck phrase "Take a leg!"
I mean, jeez, we're just trying to help is all.
But the biggest misunderstanding of them all may be our fomrah closahs naivete about his best new Philly fan friends... Have fun with that, kid.
Meanwhile, don't anybody mention this to Rush, but it looks like taxapayahs willl be helping to pick up the tab on Fenway future renovations forevah and evah.
But the fans in othah cities shouldn't fret... No, instead they should console themselves for being treated as wards by imagining that they have chosen their own protector, our benevolent and well-meaning government shepherd.