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Face the facts

Doug:
So the Sox are only able to sign Ellsbury to a 1 year deal and they remain unable to agree to arbitration terms with Ortiz.

 

Mike:
Who knew that suddenly becoming a small-mahket would be so, you know, fucking small.

 

Al:
We are like the Greece of baseball. Weighed down by the debt of paying full salaries to unproductive dissapointments who retiah too soon.

 

Doug:
And speaking of Carl Crawford, does his surprise wrist surgery and possibility of missing the staht of the season qualify as good new or bad news?

 

Mike:
Well, a smidgen of good news is that if his wrist was bothering him all season it might account for a lot of the suck.

 

Mike:
As Dave Pinto writes, "Wrist injuries are very tough on hittahs" having to absorb the contact of bat against ball.

 

Doug:
Yeah, but wouldn't Crawford have to, you know, actually make contact with the ball to feel this alleged discomfort?

 

Mike:
With 23 walks in 538 plate appearances, it's not like the sonavabitch wasn't trying for contact.

 

Al:
And speaking of flailing... Wikipedia has gone dahk.

 

Al:
Now no one undah the age of thirty will know how to confirm or disprove a statement of fact. It's gonna be awesome!

 

Doug:
Yeah, on that note, if you're looking for me today, I'll be chatting up Proactiv resistant chicks from the dermatologist's office and elightening them on the unique and miraculous acne curative powahs of Franco-American ejaculate.

 

Comments

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So, the Sox have Jacoby through the 2013 season. Then he's off to New York, or possibly Anaheim. Well, I guess I'll take three consecutive MVP-caliber seasons. It's better than a sharp stick of man pudding in the eye.

Oh Doug,you spunky devil!! Look that up on Wikipedia. Oh-never mind ;D

A-Rod has always had a lovely complexion ...

I guess I didn't know Jete's was Franco-American...

I think my fundamental problem right now is that for the first time since Henry/Lucky et al took over, I don't feel I have any sense for what the vision is. What are we looking to do? What is the focus? If we are breaking down to build up, what does that really mean? Who's actually in charge? These guys basically have a printing press for money in the Red Sox and Liverpool, and in the past I thought they were pretty accountable to the ink (fans) as to how they spent it. Now I feel as though I'm getting fleeced in a weird shell game I didn't agree to.

On a both lighter and heavier note, anyone else having as big a case of the inappropriate giggles as I over this Italian cruiseship disaster? The utter contempt in the Coast Guard's communication with the erstwhile captain (who now claims he stumbled in the lifeboat and didn't intentiionally desert the ship) is beyond funny, if you forget people actually, um, died and stuff.

Speaking of cruises, here's a couple of captioned pics from mine:


http://www.flickr.com/photos/55006143@N00/sets/72157628929187591/

I feel like we're on that cruise ship with Lucky at the helm - BC is just the pool boy.

LL: Hey, I tripped and look what I found: Vicent Padilla! BC: Great, we're all saved!

Sox front office is just rearranging deck chairs...

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