Kissing Frogs

Tara:
So I arrange things to be back in the home office for the playoffs and this is what I get — a 2 game lead on Tampa for the wild card, 10 games remaining in which .500 ball seems a reach, and Shaughnessy delivering a "Feels like old times" column?

 

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Tara:
I am not happy. Not happy at all.

 

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Susan/Circle:
Well, if its any consolation, I'm still bullish on their chances of making the playoffs.

 

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Tara:
Right. And then they just flip the "playoff" switch and everything is Rosy Sox.

 

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Susan/Circle:
Exactly. It's just like when you have a girlfriend who's dating a guy who's a total louse — you know, stingy, cheats on her, etc. — and she says, "Yeah, well, once we're married he'll change, you'll see."

 

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Tara:
Now batting for the Red Sox, the frog, Prince Charming.

 

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Susan/Circle:
Hey, doubleheadah today, double your fun.

 

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Tara:
Weiland and Lackey, sigh.

 

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Susan/Circle:
You know, if kissing Lackey in a fairytale reversal would turn him into a frog, I'd lick his fucking tonsils.

 

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Comments

[Lazlo Freem]

Anyone here still longing for the good ol' days before the pink hats?

Be careful what you wish for.

[COD]

Would she like his tonsils, or lick his tonsils?

[Bob]

Here's my take: the Sox have spent the entire season having nice, long stretches of playing excellent ball, mixed in with several crappy losing streaks. Too many crappy losing streaks in fact. But they will come out of this one, and then start a streak of playing excellent ball. Coincidentally, just in time for the playoffs.

[yazbread]

Tonsils, fava beans, and a nice chianti?

[Natalie]

Bob's sunny optimism has me putting my hair into pigtails, cuddling puppies and kittens, and skipping rope in the sunshine. Oh, who am I kidding, I am the chain smoking Goth skulking in the back, darkly predicting that this is going to end very poorly. Does it make me a shitty fan that I'd rather they not make the playoffs at all then go out in the first round in ignominy?

[soxinsix]

At least Beckett pitched well...sigh...

[Kaz]

This about sums it up for me: Jeff Passan's 10 Degress.

I disagree about the lack of blame he wants to assign to Tito though. I'm sure everyone likes a boss who's a good Cribbage player, but he seems to lead with the carrot more than the stick and this group of players isn't responding to it.

[vermonter]

Why did the CHB have to say "...skidded between his legs, Buckner style..."? He oughtta say that the piching has been "Calvin Schiraldi" style. Still pinning it on Buck. Right BWF?

Regahdless, I think they hang on to make the playoffs but won't last very long.

[yazbread]

Of course, the O's season might be salvaged if they knock the Sox out of the playoffs. Just what we need, a motivated opponent.

[LarryE]

Does anyone besides me have that gnawing feeling, given the folks that will be on the mound for us today, that our magic number, now at 9, will not move today?

[Kaz]

Guthrie is pitching for the Orioles today at 1 PM. He is the worst pitcher in the AL with a chart-topping 17 losses. Yay!

He has also won 4 of his last 5 starts and has an ERA of 1.63 in 3 games against the Red Sox this year. Boo!

We can't win for losing.

[Lauren]

Re: Tonsils.
Me too. Me too. SIGH.

I wish Kevin Youkilis wasn't broken.

[ParkerStPete]

Hand me the razor.

[Kaz]

It's a really nice day out...for a bridge jump.

[Kev]

Where did I put that noose?

[ParkerStPete]

Just shoot me.

[Chops]

Weiland is giving it up like the Orioles have a sniper in the stands.

/wrists.

[Steve in MD]

I guess FranComa is leaving this guy in the game so he can qualify for the win...

[Steve in MD]

And just as I hit 'post' he brings in pawn Felix...

[Natalie]

That cloud of smoke? Me, still in the back, still looking dour.

[ParkerStPete]

I think Natalie has a manifesto, a semi-automatic weapon, and a gym bag full of ammo.

[Natalie]

PSP- I'm guessing it was my long black trench, stilettos and dark shades that gave me away? (I'm going for "sexy paid assassin/Dragon Tattoo girl" over the more depressing 'disenfranchised high schooler with no friends and access to gramp's arsenal)


On the bright side, guys, just think how awesome their golf games are going to be with more time on the links this Fall!!

[h.b.]

And just think, as soon as the season ends, Theo can sign on as GM with the Cubs.

[Rob in CT]

Nat - this little losing streak? Nothing but a touch of heartburn. My alma mater went 4 straight *seasons* without a win in football, even losing to the Little Sisters of the Poor flag football team. I knew heartache and misery. I worked with heartache and misery. This madame, is not heartache and misery...

[Natalie]

Rob- where do you sense heartache and misery in me? I am merely the angel of darkness, predicting a bad end to the 2011 Sox, shaking my head misanthopically in the face of any optimism. While this slide certainly stings, cf. hb's strip of last week for how I personally feel (I think I used the term 'indigestion.')

[Rob in CT]

Apologies, Nat. It must have been my confusion over the swing from teal dresses in the dog park to the "Trinity-from-The-Matrix-with-a-long-black-coat-filled-with-automatic-weapons" thing that threw me off. :-D

[yazbread]

Time for Markakis to put the nail in the coffin.

[Steve in MD]

fuck.

[yazbread]

So what do we do?
Nothing. Strangely enough, it all turns out well.
How?
I don't know. It's a mystery.

[Victor Conte]

Back to the days of "there's always next year." Silver lining: maybe it'll be possible to get to some games next year without taking a second job

[Kaz]

I don't know about talking like a pirate, but that game is certainly making me swearing like a sailor.

[Roscoe]

As Derek and the Dominoes said, "I looked Away." Good thing Brady had another great game. Plus, when Wilfork came up with the INT and rumbled down the sidelines, my wife said, "Wow. That guy sure is slow." You don't that kind of analysis from TV guys.

[soxinsix]

Not to worry folks, we've got Lackey going in the nightcap...WTF am I saying? This losing skid has me all fucked up.

[NeverSummer]

how the? what the? thank God for the patriots and Bruins and maybe, just possibly, a Celtics team that could be semi-ok. Fuck, i would go to a Revs game if it could keep me from staring at that giant elephant in the room with the pink hat on. ugh. 6-5 and Lackey pitching tonight. great.

[louclinton]

not good.

fuck me in the mouf.

giving up shortly.

your stalwart,

lc

[louclinton]

Oh I forgot. Game report from Friday.

Best. Seats. Ever.

Beckett wins.

Ace. Bard. Pap. Just like we drew it up.

Guy I know from the RS front office tells me: " the guy guy downstairs" (i.e. Theo's lair) says that in February he predicted 93 wins. And that, to date, the have scored one more run and have given up two less runs than he predicted.

I say "so he knew Lackey sucked in February, why not tell the rest of us"

Silence.

Omerta, bitches.

lovingly,

lc

p.s. see you in the Series.

[yazbread]

Well this one is starting out nicely.

[Harwich Rich]

2011-the year of teh suck ;(

[soxdownunder]

Betcha Lackey says something like "I didn't think I pitched all that badly ..."

[Bob]

Actually, sdu, he said, "I felt better than I have all season warming up in the bullpen."