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I had a title for this but I forgot it

Bill:
Seeing A-Rod's face aftah he got his bleached asshole singed on Pap's 97 mph fastball to end the game was the highlight of my June so fah.

 


Bill:
He may be a dumbass inbred redneck, but damnit, he's our dumbass inbred redneck.

 

Bill:
Meanwhile, tied for first and the Red Sox have taken 6 of 7 from the Yankees in thus fah in '11.

 

Doug:
Yeah, and yet that somehow came as surprise to me. We've really taken 6 of 7?

 

Bill:
Look, dude, I keep tellin' you... until you lay off the hydro it's only gonna get worse.

 

Doug:
Worse? Or bettah?

 

Bill:
Yeah, it's all fun and games now until somebody's so high they forget they've left their RealDoll in the cah with the window's rolled up on a hot summah's day.

 

Doug:
Hey, that's not fucking funny!

 

Bill:
Of course not. It's friggin Dollicide is what it is.

 

Doug:
I have zero tolerance for irresponsible stonahs... zero.

 

Comments

I thought that shit last night was supposed to be nationally televised, as all of the "Greatest Rivalry in the History of Spohts EVAAHHHH"(tm) are, but I couldn't find it on the damn schedule. I had to follow it on MLB.com, which is quite sad.

The Post headline is "Papi Crock!"


Ooo, they're all upset about Ortiz flipping his bat. Boo-frigging-hoo. I'd be more concerned about the ball he flipped about 450 feet.


And please, H.B. enough with the mannequin-slaughter talk. Just the thought of a real doll melting to death in a hot car makes me weepy. Although I suppose the remnants of the memory foam could be molded into a suitable, if uglier, replacement.

Thought I would share this from an article. Damn I love Ortiz.

Girardi was concerned that Ortiz would offend the 24-year-old rookie reliever.
“Yeah, I didn’t really care for it,” Girardi said. “I’ve never had a problem with David Ortiz. He’s been a clutch player for a long time. My reaction’s probably more protecting our young kid. And that’s what I’m going to do.”
Ortiz dismissed any ill-intent on the flip. “That’s Papi style,” Ortiz said.

Perhaps Girardi should protect his player by getting him to pitch better.

Sign...Paps...now!!!

I agree they should sign him, but it would be nice to see him pitch a 1-2-3 ninth more frequently instead of these 20+ pitch nail-biters we get too often.

Also nice to see Kevin Millar sitting seats that actual mfy fans can't afford.

Need to do some market research on this one. Real dolls sold with a cell phone so you can send along Weinergrams when separated. Or have the Japanese already scooped me on this?

Back to the game. Someone should tell the Globe good pitchers win even when they lack total command. Deal with it.

"sitting in seats" duh.

I thought the game was on last night, too, da kine. Turns out it's tonight's game that will be on ESPN's Wed. Night Baseball.

Happy for Lester's "W" last night, but it doesn't sound like he's all that comfortable. Hope Timmah has the flutterball working the magic tonight.

Papi's having a pretty impressive season so far. 4th in the AL in BATTING AVERAGE, no less and tied for fifth in HRs. The only reason his RBI total is down is that Adrian and Youk tend to knock them in before he has a chance. I guess the talk of his demise last April was a tad premature.

Does anyone else wish we had a stronger actor than Guy From the Office (I checked, that is his real name) representing us in those rivalry commercials?

Agreed re "guy from the Office."


I don't mind him to be "one of several" but for this guy to become the face of male Red Sox Nation... ugh.

Dennis Leary? Ben Affleck? Matt Damon? Lots of choices.

Also, those commercials are all written by NY guys at a NYC agency, which is painfully obvious. Baldwin always gets the better of Office-guy. Fortunately, the Red Sox have gotten the better of the Yankees so far this year, so commercials be damned.

Thats Jim from the Office or John Krasinski not Guy. But anyways, the game was on MLB network. David Cone was doing color and Matt Vasgersian ( former SD play by play guy) I don't know about the overall availability of the MLB network or cost in other areas but in a year or so they actually will have some decent talent. I mean they already have Gammons. Just saying if you are a baseball fan this network is becoming a viable option.... Now about the NHL network... yuck

Get the Bruins bear after the series is over-I'm sure he can beat the crap out of Baldwin ;D

was able to watch NESN broadcast on MLB package on Directv. Thoughts... Don n Jerry still the best by far, even when Don comes out with something totally gay like "deuces wild" when the count was 2-2 with two outs and a guy on second. Paps won but for the first time I can remember he looked scared on the mound last night. Very unsure of himself. And fuck Girardi and anyone else who doesnt think a batter should be allowed to strut and flip. I want competitive play. I want DLowe pounding his groin when he strikes out an A in the playoffs, I want a bat flip, a fist pump. Christ, if you want a gentlemen's game, go watch golf or cricket. Girardi never has anything to say about Aroid flipping his bat or Cano's shit eating grin when he dings one out.

In NJ we had the dubious pleasure of watching the game on My9 with Special Kay, who might require wrist braces after his excessive pom-pom shaking last night. Totally shied away from blasting Jeter for swinging at Ball 4 around his eyes in the 9th last night.

I totally agree, Jeff. Hell, Papi had been almost hit by the prior pitch and he crushed his HR into that rediculously short porch in left. He knew it was gone the second he hit it. It wasn't like he had to run hard because it might have been off the wall and he'd have to hustle into second for a double. And I don't get how Girardi criticizing Papi is protecting the pitcher, unless the pitcher was devastated by the bat flip and went crying to Girardi afterwards that he wanted Girardi to try to make Papi stip doing those mean things.

I just think it's hilarious when the YANKEES are criticizing US for a bad attitude. What's the word I'm looking for? Oh, that's right... http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/hypocrisy

I of course meant the rediculously short porch in right. Yikes.

I am between houses and living a somewhat nomadic existence this summer. So I opted for MLBTV with the option of home announcers. Must admit the picture is high quality. The downside is the commercials are not broadcast and I miss those Sullivan Tire ads.

I decided to go all in this year post return from London exile, for an orgy of baseball: MLB package on Fios AND the MLBtv subscription on the interwebs. The MLB should dedicate a day at Fenway to me after all that... As for My9, by and large I was modestly impressed by it. Sure, it's homer announcing, but so is NESN. There were times I actually learned something new, and only a few head-scratchingly inane comments. Plus, I was totally stoked to get the quiz question about pre-Pap first pitcher to 200 saves in fewest appearances right. Blind squirrel got the nut last night, baby.

So - missed the game last night. U2 concert in Oakland. But the "flip" of the bat - really?? Papi tossed it aside - hardly a flip to standup a little pre-school pitcher that needs a hug from JG. Torii Hunter does more on a F8. Shove a binky in your pie hole Joe and take another for your little reliever.

The Scadenfreude over on the Joy of Sox site is delicious. The worm has indeed turned. Once again the yankee press is looking to the Red Sox as a model for how the Yankees should be doing things. They so want the Papi bat flip to be the equivalent of the the Varitek-McBluelips event. Delicious.

@Harwich - Love the B Bear.
@ VaSox - Would love the Bear to maul "Enzo" and "Doc" and "Pierre". Wish we could eject them from finals.

Good link, Bob. That is a great gesture by the rangers. You never know what motivation will be the one to help a guy in that kid's situation. Classy move.

Sweet move by the Rangers. Anyone else suppressing a bunch of third grade jokes?

That's a fantastic article Bob. Especially after all the silly ballyhoo about a stupid batflip.


Also, wanted to ask y'all creepers what you think about the Brick Program thing they're doing nex year for the 100th anniversary. Neat idea or shameless money grab? Discuss.

Discussion... Yes. It is both. And sometimes good ideas come along that are both. I kind of like the idea - its like going back to your old neighborhood and finding your handprint in the concrete walk from way back. The replica makes it all work. Curious what the censor's criteria will be for messages on the bricks. Ideas for msgs could be fun... 36-24-36 (name that tune)

//Neat idea or shameless money grab? Discuss.// I agree with Jeff: it is both. Mrs sdu - who, it must be said, is by no means parsimonious - wants one for the family.

Well melt my Real Doll! What a satisfying night.


And with some beautiful moments from both games. Papi goes deep again (and Girardi puts on a pickle sucking face). And then Timmy whacks Burrows in the crease. Fantastic.


Hey, did you hear this stat:


In 5-on-5 hockey this postseason, the Bruins are plus-25, the Canucks minus-2.

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