Lobster back in play

Bill:
Well, hullo, Mr. Crawford. Pleased to meet you at last.

 

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Mike:
Seriously. The dude is looking like $142 million bucks these days.

 

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Bill:
It's still hahd to wrap my head around it... Since starting 2-10, the Red Sox are 26-12.

 

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Mike:
Can I get some friggin lobstah on that roll?

 

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Bill:
Going into Memorial Day weekend and feeling pretty damn good.

 

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Mike:
Well, unless you're a teenagah with "Facebook Depression."

 

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Bill:
WTF? For reals?

 

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Mike:
Yeah, "it results from being bombarded with friend tallies, status updates, and photos of people happy, having the time of their lives, when you are not."

 

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Bill:
OK, so let me get this straight...

 

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Bill:
Kids today live in a world of sexting, friends with benefits and casual hookups where a b.j. is so common it's not even categorized undah a sex heading, unlimited access to porn, and their entire music and video collection available anytime, anywhere on their ubiquitous portable smart devices...

 

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Bill:
And they are depressed?

 

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Bill:
I mean in my day we lived with acne, a permanent case of blue balls, 3 tv channels, and a limited, hardcopy porn stash infrequently upgraded.

 

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Mike:
*And* a cursed Red Sox team.

 

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Bill:
Yeah, and a cursed, World Series deficient Red Sox team *and* we had to walk 7 miles in 3 feet of snow...

 

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Mike:
Uphill...

 

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Bill:
And we were happy, damnit, happy!

 

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Comments

[HunterStars]

and if a cougar attack left you with bite marks, it meant you got mauled by a large, wild feline on a hike...

[louclinton]

were we?

[Bob]

Kids today also have Yelp reviews and Angie's List and the like. In myyyyy day, we had to buy our x-ray specs simply on the promise of being able to see through girls' clothing. No reviews, no star rating system. Just blind faith that an advertiser with enough taste and class to advertise on the back cover of comic books wouldn't rip you off.

[COD]

My x-ray specs worked just fine. The key was to buy them out of the back of an Archie.

[h.b.]

Speaking of Archie... in my prepubescent (and early post) fantasies, Veronica did some very, very nasty things... very nasty.

[h.b.]

And let's not even discuss Nancy Drew.

[buckner was framed]

Lynda Carter as Wonder Woman? with the lasso? hell-lo

[buckner was framed]

I can't work today (not that that's a shock to my coworkers): 10 hours to game time, which means ~8 hours to the first pre puck-drop brew, which in turn comes 90 minutes after beer cart(tm). Way too much to do to be productive

[Professional Hitter]

Add Trixie Belden to the literary tart list. And no fancy real dolls to take your frustrations out on; I had to rub against a garbage bag full of dryer lint and broken glass and hope for the best.

[Basho]

Oh Wilma Deering
Biddi biddi biddi Hey!
Ready Ranger 3.

[Lauren]

I wasn't a kid that long ago... graduated high school in 2002... and I had nothing!
Damn kids.
If I could just get 'em to stay off my lawn!

[redleghockey]

Nothing like long hockey trips with my 16 year old listening to his tales of debauchery with his number one running buddy. Now I know what a tuggah, handy and old-fashioned really mean...

[pablo in nh]

Anyone still have their "throw your voice" device, guaranteed to make people wonder where that voice in the steamer trunk was coming from? ("Help! Let me out!")
Mine didn't work either.

[jfm]

Funny as hell strip today. Buckner... enjoy the game dude. Game 7 ECF tickets are a rare gem.

[Natalie]

I marvel at how overly monitored children these days are...as though there has been a surge in pedophilia, with a kiddy rapist around every corner. Back when I was a kid, I swear my parents had literally no idea where my brother and I were most of the time. Seriously. I mean, they let us at ages 8 and 10 take a motorized dinghy out in Montauk harbor, tooling around large shipping vessels, no life jackets, wandering Gosman's dock with no supervision. CPS would be called these days...

[vermonter]

Buckner...I'm useless at work today, too. The kids get to watch videos today. I've got such Bruins game 7 energy, not to mention a houseful of friends for the weekend. Back when I was 8, in 1972, the Bruins did a very exciting thing...

[Harwich Rich]

You're waiting till 6 for a beer,Buck?? So glad I have today off. Remember it's always Beer Cart time somewhere ;)

[ParkerStPete]

I was 11 in 1966 when my family moved from Virginia to London. On day 2 I was off, by myself, on the Underground and LT buses, into the terraces at West Ham, Chelsea, and QPR with the yobos, wandering from Wembley to Wimbledon with my school pals... That freedom was the greatest gift I ever got from my parents; echo that nowadays I would end up in child services.

[soxinsix]

I always thought Betty was hotter than Veronica.

[louclinton]

then, your kids get older.

here's what lc jr. advised me this week:

"you can drink an ugly girl pretty, but you can't drink a fat girl skinny"

words to live by.

lucidly,

lc

[pablo in nh]

And for those of us Chip Hilton fans of a certain age, remember:

Clair Bee knows what makes boys tick,
but Carolyn Keene, via Nancy Drew, knows what makes boys throb.

[louclinton]

In re: Carolyn Keene.

Her real name was Mildred Wirt Benson.

Hot, huh?

[yazbread]

1967. Ten years old. Dad - can I have a ride to Bobby's? No - you can walk. Six miles round trip. Cold NE October. Got home late that night. This was pre-milk carton. I grew up in the Wonder Years and feel blessed.

[SAC]

What? You the guy who found and made off with my "TITS" mag in the woodpile?

I want it back. You didn't find treasures like those at the town dump every day!

[pseudosanity78]

The problem with a lot of today's kids is that they *talk* about doing a lot of shit without actually doing any of it. Hence perpetrating the vicious circle of everyone else thinking they have a crap existence and all their friends are out having fun- while 90% of them are probably sitting at home just the same. (waiting just long enough to update their facebook status so they don't look like a billy-no-mates)

[ponch]

This Blueshirts fan wishes you Bruins fans luck tonight. Seriously! As long as it's not the gorram Devils playing I'm fine.

[sonomasox]

Betty and Veronica are a bit old for me...I'm a Daphne man. Give me another Scooby snack - I'll do what she wants. Make a dog break a chain.

Damn kids are just pissing away a good thing.

[Bob]

LC, you might not be able to drink a fat girl skinny. But you can drink her voluptuous.

Which is why we have beer cart. Today featuring Meantime IPA, and Manny's Celebrated Uterus Bitters.

Have a great long weekend all. Hopefully we'll have something fun to yak about on Tuesday.

[COD]

"Go Ugly Early"

Motto of Harry's Chocolate Shop - West Lafayette, IN.

[yazbread]

Wow. What a game.

[Bob]

Breathe..breathe...breathe...

[soxdownunder]

Woo hoo!! (almost 8 year old sox and bruins fan out of control)

[soxdownunder]

Why are they famous? Because theyr'e the world ice hockey champions.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T7Iffu6JrN4&feature=player_embedded

[PAPesky]

"Go ugly early" served my membership well through the 70s-80s. I knew our grasshopper would turn into a bell-cricket by Memorial Day.
Thanks to Kawabata. PAPesky

[urm]

Timmah!!!!
Now if that isn't nice, what is?

[Bob]

A brilliant idea, SDU. We sneak Vegemite into Vancouver's food, and victory is certain!

[Bob]

With all the Bruin-ha-ha going on, I almost forgot that the Red Sox are now in first place.

[TimW (No, not that one)]

@urm, time to tell the kids in the front office they only need to find ONE new starter. Their other new starter is the oldest one. Timmah for the win!