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I wouldn't call him a butterfly though...

Bill:
So the Cleveland Indians are beatable aftah all... had me worried there for a minute.

 

Mike:
I think anybody in this league is pretty beatable when Josh Beckett is on the mound.

 

Mike:
A 1.69 ERA? Allowing just two runs in his last 30 innings? Nasty.

 

Bill:
He's gone all friggin Die Verwandlung... the hurlah is now a true craftsman.

 

Mike:
Remember what Curt Schilling said?

"When he does combine max effort in the mental preparation arena (which is not to say he hasn’t before, but as you age you learn different things about yourself and the game) with his physical preparation, things could get interesting."

 

Bill:
Funny, if you take away the pahts about mental and physical preparation arenas, that's pretty much exactly what my career counselors said about me.

 

Mike:
Uncanny.

 

Comments

Lester today at noon. I love day baseball, but this is an odd get-away day. I mean, Detroit is only 90 air miles from Cleveland. Maybe they'll take the train. Very old school. "Hey look, there's Babe Youk regaling fans in the bar car with tales of his latest debauchery."

If Manny was still playing he could shill his amazing and delicious revitalizing herbal tonics and elixirs at each train stop. Also does wonders for your uterus, apparently.

Is there some way you can delay, perhaps for years, that final moment before your name is written down by a bony hand in the cold diary of major league retirement? Of course there is, ladies and gentlemen, and that is shy I am here. That is why I have traveled over great wastes of stormy seas, to ask that you let me help you to good health, vigor, and a long Hall of Fame career, with the aid of the remarkable bottle I now hold in my hand. Manny's Celebrated Uterus Bitters: the wonderful remedy for slow bat speed, base running consumption, and all of the ills that afflict the major league player's body. It is made from roots, barks, gums, leaves, oils and berries gathered by little Kickapoo children from God's great laboratory — the fertile fields and vast forests of Balco.

Too bad Dice-Lackey went all "Gregor Samsa" on the team. Also too bad they didn't scatter like cockroaches when the lights get turned on.


(I know - I'm reaching here. Just try to work with me, huh?)

Oh my God, Bob. That was hilarious. Well done.


Uterus Bitters. Heh!

Uterus Bitters would be a great name for a band.

And Jason Varitek was the best part...

Yep, Tek. Awesome. Tim Thomasesque.

Assgerbil Cabrera - Richard Gere's #1 Fantasy Player

Earliest I ever heard a live game was 10 am, before today,. 8 am staht.

Shoddily, lc

this just in. it's not Tribe Time

the trainer must have poured Uterus Bitters over the team's Wheaties this morning...

the trainer must have poured Uterus Bitters on the team's Wheaties this morning...

Nice, Bob. Uterus Bitters also sounds like the scientific term for menopause.

Two theories. One - Indians went into 'get out of town' mode before the Sox. Two - our relief pitching lurks, so don't chalk up the win yet.

We certainly seems to score a lot of runs for Lester. Presumably he'll be 7-1 by the end of the game.


If you gave Uterus Bitters a modern drug name, it would probably be something like Utebit. Then you'd want a modern slogan -- something like "You da man with Utebit" which of course is ironic and oxymoronic on multiple levels.

Woomitrin.


Falopiate.


Sirvixalot.

The Indians should take two Asskicrin and call us in the morning.

You can tell who them medical adman in the group is...

For a relaxing time; make it Uterus Bitters Time. Not Tribe time (tnx lc).

Billy D. Williams for Uterus Bitters?

Uterus bitters as a drug would be more like...


Menstruex. Take 3-4 days, once a month.


...or maybe Ovaratrol.


Definitely not Tylenol PMS.

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