Hey, these grapes are sour!

Bill:
Hey, who needs a Cliff Lee or a Roy Halladay?

 

---

Doug:
Winning is so fucking overrated.

 

---

Bill:
Seriously, and besides, we've got Liverpool FC. What about that, huh? huh?

 

---

Bill:
That's right. Soccer, bitches.

 

---

Doug:
Hands are so fucking overrated.

 

---

Bill:
Oh, and memo to Liverpudlians: Bettah put aside 10 quid for your official Liverpool FC Nation ID cahds.

 

---

Doug:
How much is that in Euros?

 

---

Bill:
Hey, it's a bahgain in any currency.

 

---

Comments

[Harwich Rich]

Will they have their own Wally??

[granular_serene]

is there any way this becomes a moneymaker like yes did for the yanks? is it possible that this puts us in a position to compete dollar-wise?

[mwl in MD]

"How much is that in euros?" Good one, h.b.

[yazbread]

I may have to get a Liverpool pink hat.

[Jeff in NC]

My fear is the opposite, granular. That this drains away owner dollars and we won't even be able to afford the Boofs of the league any longer.

And last night, both Young and Thome watched home run pitches go by so they could swing at dog shit and leave men on. Twin killers.

[Scott]

Very depressing day yesterday. Pats trade their best WR, then the Sox owners spend money they should have used on Teixeira for a fucking soccer team. And then Teixeira wins the fucking game for the Skanks. Lose-lose-lose. Good times.

[grumbles]

Anyone else get the sense that Red Sox: Yanks :: Liverpool: Man U?

If sox ownership can't beat Yanks Inc. in the US, maybe they can on another continent. Anyone know which Cricket team the Yanks own?

[Jeff in NC]

Sidetrack for those who witnessed the departure of el Jeffe in yesterday's strip comments...

When the political rap of the overpaid, lying dirtbags currently in our country's leadership positions and their sycophantic media groupies get you so angry that you can not recognize friends and like minded individuals when they are right in front of you (internetically speaking), you are in deep doo doo. I am not one of the like minded people politically speaking, being generally left leaning with only a minority of fellow travelers within this group, but do enjoy the high minded discourse that occurs here. I also like the ball jokes. And the smack downs. And the occasional reference to such fine ideas as salt yum. El jeffe, hope to see you back.

[Bob]

Great struip, H.B. Got to get this seen in Liverpool papers and websites. Perhaps I shall spend a bit of time visiting said sites.

[Bob]

"Struip"? I guess that's a combo of a strip and stirrups. Something I saw at The Glass Slipper one night.

[Jason O.]

It's a match made in Heaven, one dangerous, venal and spiteful fan base merges with another:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heysel_Stadium_disaster

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hillsborough_disaster

It's amusing that these events are referred to as "disasters" as if they were acts of God and not general characteristics of Liverpool fans.

[Bob]

"Liverpool Banter," check.

http://www.liverpoolbanter.co.uk/2010/10/latest-lfc-news-from-the-liver-234.html

[yazbread]

Yesterday's comments were political? Only if you equate politics with farcical aquatic ceremonies.

[LarryE]

Great strip, h.b. It was worth the wait.

Jeff: I'll stick my left-leaning neck out and suggest we may not be in that much of a minority.

As for Liverpool, I think these businesses will be separate and the success or failure of one may not have much impact on the other. I may be wrong.

As for the Sox next year, since only two nameplates were taken down from the locker room after the last game -- Mike Lowell's and Victor Martinez', I'm gonna go out on a limb and say that Martinez won't be back. Since the free agent market is thin, let's say that all Theo does, apart from the bullpen, is get Adam Dunn and sign Beltre (it could happen). The line-up doesn't look bad at all:

Ellsbury CF
Pedroia 2B
Beltre 3B
Youkilis 1B
Dunn LF
Ortiz DH
Drew RF
Scuturo SS
Salt Yum C

[Rob in CT, er, AL]

Jeff - a thoughtful and measured post. Certainly more so than mine late yesterday evening. My tolerance for intolerance (mostly due to the polarization of the political "sides") is at an all time low. I guess I am, as you elegantly put it, in "deep doo doo". Time to take a deep breath and exhale slowly.

Maybe this is all simply result of watching Sox-less post-season baseball and another fucking Yankee win when the Twinkies should have had Game 1 wrapped up...

Now back to our regularly scheduled salt yum and ball washing.

[Rob in CT, er, AL]

Bob - Nice linkage. Wait - that sounded kind of gay... (I presume that's you with the Boston Red Sox fan's take post?)

And can you imagine an editor here in the States demanding that the Red Sox fans have a voice on the board of the Sox? What the hell is in that Liverpudlian water? :-D

[Jason O.]

Umm, Granular? The ownership of the Red Sox could buy and sell the Steinbrenner family.

And I love all of this cosmetic left/right bullshit, when the reality is that The Dallas Fed ran the numbers and conservatively estimates the total unfunded liabilities tied to Medicare, SS and Medicaid to be $104 trillion, with a T.

The probability that either major party does anything about this is either jack or shit, choose one.

So if you're younger than 55-60, the first shoe to drop will be when the bond market wakes up and starts taking aim at US treasuries. Marginal tax rates of 90% will not be far behind...it's coming, just when the fall occurs is the question.

[deiseach]

If this gets circulated amongst Liverpool fans, it might be an idea to delete that comment from Jason O. Whatever about Heysel, the idea that Liverpool fans were in any way to blame for Hillsborough is a villainous libel, akin to blaming the victims of 9/11 for turning up to work

[h.b.]

I think Jason O is onto something.

Though I don't think there is any chance that anyone will pay the 90% rates. Post-apocalypic USA here we come!

I wonder if it'll be better to live in the parts the Chinese have taken over or the parts under Sharia Law? Prob the Chinese, right?

What am I saying, i won't survive long after the EMP. But I am armed, so I'll go down with some fight at least.

[Rob in CT, er, AL]

Ha ha! Right out of Red Dawn, h.b.

"A member of an elite para-military organization: 'Eagle Scouts.'"

[Steve in MD]

Supposedly Texas has the constitutional right to leave the Union at any time - and will probably do so before we get to 90% marginal tax rates, so there's that option. Weather sucks though...

[COD]

we had a marginal tax rate in this country of between 88% and 91% from 1942 to 1963. The country was booming in the post war years, even with those tax rates. The top rate was 70% all the way until 1980. If rates go up again they'll be a lot of screaming and yelling, but we'll do what we always do in this country. We'll bend over and take it.

[Jeff in NC]

you mean all we have to do to get Texas to leave is to keep on this path? VICTORY!!

Actually, Rob, I rather enjoyed your response yesterday.

Jason O., truth. Neither party will do anything about it because that would mean making hard decisions and telling voters something they do not want to hear - sorry, no benefits, no checks, no police, no fire, no VA, no defense, no fixed roads, no healthcare, no schools, - wait this sounds a lot like 1917, no.. sounds like the Tea Baggers. We are fucked. Sure hope the Red Sox do better next year, then I wont care.

WOLVERINES!!!!

[Harwich Rich]

...but who will the Rangers play?? ;D

[h.b.]

Every time I see "COD" I think of Christine... Salt yom yom, time for some one-handed typing.

[Jeff in NC]

or "cod piece". shrivel.

Sorry COD, it was just lying there. couldnt stop myself.

[pseudosanity78]

I really hope with the apparent takeover of Liverpool that Henry understands what he's getting himself into.

Football is a completely different beast and the fans are nothing if not rabid (in a good way) about their teams.

I'm reminded of a comment my husband made when arriving at his first ever baseball game that makes that point clear. He said wide eyed- 'They let opposing fans sit together? Really? That just doesn't happen at home. Wouldn't happen.'

[Natalie]

hb- and isn't that just the irony of Ms. O'Donnell, the lusty onanism she inspires in men she is fervently opposed to inciting? Also, if she is truly sincere about the anti-masturbation thing, then I can guarantee you the woman ain't never had an orgasm. I wonder what would happen to her worldview if forcibly held down and made to have one? Let's discuss. (And yes, this is a shameless attempt for salt yum thinking to get us off politics, because it makes my heart hurt when I don't agree with people I admire ;)

[h.b.]

Oh, I don't buy your guarantee, Nat. Not all all. LOL.

Masturbation is way overrated in that regard.

(And, consequently, time spent with a true alpha male is seriously underrated.)

Yum.

[COD]

I'm thinking I might want to change my nickname for the duration of the election season. I don't want Mrs HB blaming me because HB comes to bed spent.

[Natalie]

I think it is very hard for women to have orgasms with others unless they know their bodies and what ticks for them. At least, the friends I know who have never had the big O were the ones who never helped themselves. Those of us who like to help ourselves are generally pretty able to get theirs with others. Just my theory. That and $1.25 will get you a Big Gulp. :)

As for time spent with a true alpha male, I for one have never underrated that. Salt yum indeed.

[Jason O.]

Jeff in NC's obvious, transparent straw man (i.e., even a modest restraint on the growth of federal spending equals complete societal breakdown and the DEATH OF CHILDREN!) has worked for 25 years and probably will continue to work for a few more years, anyway. Remember that the bond market sleeps until the day it wakes up.

[Jeff in NC]

Yes, let's. I had to do a quick who the fuck is Christine web search and came up with supporting argument for the "she ain't ever had one" theory...

She apparently had sexual encounters in college but was "not promiscuous". then she went chaste. In other words, she got short dicked and never got introduced to Ms. O.

I'm thinking after she gets introduced and then goes on a whirlwind trip to get to know this thing better, her repsonse to folks asking her current political views will be something like "What? uh, masturbation is bad? I said that? I think I want a do over"

[COD]

So the big question is how do we enlightened members of RSN profit from the coming financial meltdown? I'm thinking guns, commodities, and duct tape are prime investments :)

[Jason O.]

COD: Comparing the United States from 1940-1980 to the United States from 2010-2050 is pretty funny and by that I mean risible.

[Jason O.]

Unless we open the borders, let about 35 million illegals in and change the current tax system to one that's consumption-based...Shit, I am open to suggestions.

Hola, fanaticos de los Red Sox!

[COD]

People don't change that quickly JO. Hell, we are talking about a Senate candidate that holds Victorian era opinions about masturbation. If the govt jacks up tax rates there will be no widespread revolt.

[h.b.]

The new Journal of Sexual Medicine national sex survey is out.

http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/jsm.2010.7.issue-s5/issuetoc

Some interesting data...

+ Woman having anal sex is way up.

+ Among women who had vaginal sex in their last encounter, the percentage who said they reached orgasm was 65. Among those who received oral sex, it was 81. But among those who had anal sex, it was 94.

So onanism aside, it looks like there are quite a few, er, routes to the big O.

Bottom's up. Yum.

[Jeff in NC]

Lighten up, Francis.

Jesus, Jason O. (and I mean the spanish pronunciation of course)... I was trying to agree with you about the lack of political will.

Need a little one handed typing time to blow off some steam?

or maybe just enjoy the fact that that team you seem to like is still playing ball?

[h.b.]

There will be no widespread revolt.

The people will love the health care bill once it passes.

If we pass the stimulus, unemployment will not go above 8%.

The Red Sox will win 95 games.

I loves me some predictions!

[Jeff in NC]

So if the oralsexanalsexvaginalsex numbers get close enough to 100, do girls start to look at the world like us boys do? you know, sexual inuendo everywhere all the time? and does the abstinence crowd simply get stampeded like an english soccer fan on the wrong side of the mob?

[h.b.]

From my experience, many in the "abstinence crowd" do not count anal and oral as a breach of their abstinence.

Ain't just the liberals and the bath house boys having all the fun.

I'm just sayin'...

[Rob in CT, er, AL]

This afternoon's discussion:

Um, wow. I mean, um, just... just... WOW.

Sitting here trying to imagine what some poor soul from an island-bound former colonial power east of here must be thinking should he/she have unwittingly followed Bob's link over to this creepy site. Actually, I hope somebody puts that up on YouTube. That'd be some funny shite right there.

And Natalie, I'm almost afraid to ask, but if $1.25 gets me a Big Gulp, what the hell does $20 get me?

[Best Keanu Reeves voice] - "Whoa."

[buckner was framed]

Rob- beat me to it. Er, so to speak

[buckner was framed]

I guess the big take-away from the Journal article is that the anal folks had a better UZR as compared with the other center fielders

[soxdownunder]

I had an orgasm once but it was the wrong kind.

(with tip of hat to Woody Allen)

[louclinton]

Jackie Robinson is a defender for Liverpool. Can Ditka be far behind?

[louclinton]

and yes, all future comments in the offseason will concern the Liverpudlians

[Bob]

Four days after the end of the season, it's finally happens: the Soxaholix crowd has just released six months of pent-up frustration.

As Linda Lovelace would say, "hand me an umbrella."

[Jeff in NC]

so the abstinence argument is reall just a save the vagina, but feel free to poke around elsewhere argument? this just keeps getting better :)