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Bent in the undergrowth

Marty:
Hey, Bill, there's getting swept and there's getting motherfucking Dysoned.

 

Marty:
Sure is some weak chow-duh up there on the village green. Heh-heh.

 

Bill:
Mahty shouldn't you be busy laundering some Goldman Sachs money right about now?

 

Marty:
Ah, Billy, flattery will get you nowhere.

 

Marty:
But you know, Bill, it's never too late to cross over into the light and spend your autumn years within the warm embrace of Yankee pride and dominance.

 

Marty:
I mean why fight it? There's no need.

 

Marty:
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood. One led to Loserville one led to Nirvana... I'm just saying, Bill.

 

Bill:
Yeah, Mahts, tempting offah and all but you're forgetting I've been to Nirvana, drank the wine, perfumed my nut sack, bayed undah the light of a red moon, fist bumped the ghost of Babe Ruth...

 

Bill:
And it was good. It was very good.

 

Marty:
Yet so fleeting.

 

Marty:
Oh, yes, what a great story, one for the ages.

 

Marty:
But it must be dawning on you and your ilk now, even the dumb ones, that there's no there there.

 

Marty:
Yes, the books have been written about how "smart" the Red Sox have become and the great sea change under the new ownership and gifted GM... but that is all the sad human tendency to find order out of chaos and chance.

 

Bill:
2004 and 2007 were chance?

 

Marty:
Yes, Bill.

 

Marty:
The Red Sox are like Eyjafjallajokull. Every so often, once or twice over 80-100 years, they'll erupt and there will be a great billowing and Red Sox fans will drop to their knees in charming yet puerile astonishment.

 

Marty:
Meanwhile, the Yankees, on the other hand, are like one sunny, temperate day after another.

 

Marty:
And the forecast calls for victory.

 

Marty:
Again.

 

Comments

The Red Sox haven't had a lead in 48 innings, and now Marty shows up waxing all Palpatine on us.


Anyone have a spare block of Carbonite?

I got nuthin'...and neither do they.

I find odd comfort in being a loser again. My ex-wife has been right all along.

Yeah, Mahts, it's only taken the Yankees a full decade and billions in payroll to get their first championship of the century, but there's no "there" there for the Sox...

I don't know how to search for the data, but I wonder how many 4-9 stretches the Red Sox have had in the last couple of years, or in 04 or 07? I suspect it happens just about every year. Starting the year with that streak just seems worse because it is sort of in your face.

I'll let Chip Diller have the final word. (Warning - 5 second audio link...safe for work)
http://www.tigersweat.com/movies/animal/house13.wav

I was hoping that when Georgie finally succumbed to his various ills, the sons would be less interested in continuing the dynasty, but it doesn't seem that's the case. And while I think Theo is smart, I think he makes plenty of mistakes, not even talking about this "run prevention" focus (which of course with an admittedly small sample size has been an utter disaster). Perennial problem Shortstop and now Catcher are problems exacerbated by very inconsistent pitching. Yikes.


Let's hope they turn this aroiund quickly.


And I'd like to see Francona go all Eyjafjallajokull and try to light a fire under this team, which seems to be playing without ant passion.


Lastly, has anyone noticed thatr J.D. Drew is batting lower than Papi, with an astonishing two more Ks !!!

The Sox have the talent but just cannot click right now. I'm still willing to give them until May to see if they can adjust.


Otherwise it's Rays vs. MFY for the East and we're sitting wondering WTF happened.

Go Bruins. (I'm working on becoming a front runner like Mahty:))

Sit back and enjoy the B's and Celts until the Sox get it together

Yankees = establishment. not a good mix with a dude such as me.


No, thank you very much for your offer of spoon fed boredom. I'll stick with my chaos and chance. I'm very well aware of how this sounds to the "winners" of the world, but no Yankee fan has ever or will ever have the feeling that Red Sox fans had in 2004.

What stood out for me yesterday was the Keystone Cops-like play in the outfield. The whole series was a Mack Sennett production. (Look it up. lc knows what I'm talking about...) Maybe I should have watched the game in black and white instead of high def...


And speaking of front-running, how about that hit Boychuk put on Matt Ellis. Oh my goodness gracious! One for the ages. Or that Recchi forearm to Kennedy ahead of the assist. 42 years old and beating the kid to the puck. Fun game to watch. (Yeah, I've got Versus in my hotel room...)

Oh. And "Fuck You", Marty.

At least you lot don't have a new fan to deal with. Having been introduced to the Red Sox fam just a mere 6 years ago my husband is ready to toot the damn apocalypse trumpet every time they drop more than one game. It's like- 'Here honey, have a Guinness and a keilbasa and chill the fuck out for a few, you're making me want to chew my own face off.'

Rob- you took the expletive words right out of my mouth.

Why does reading this make me so angry?! I can feel my face getting red and I want to punch Marty in his stupid little cartoon mouth.

Still- getting swept by the Rays! Where the hell is that pitching-and-defense that I was promised? More games like this and I'll actually be able to get tickets...

I wish I had to look some of these cultural references up once and a while.

Cue the sunsets, these boys are horrible.

forlornly,

lc

For the love of Pedro... when are we going to sit Pappi's ass down and put Mikey in as DH??? I mean really now, what have we got to lose. No offense, no defense. Got nuthin...

clicking heels and repeating: "It's only April...It's only April..."


Not working and still want to dropkick Marty in the nuts.

Hunter - I wish h.b. wasn't "quite" so good at nailing the dick-ness that is the prototypical privileged, self-righteous Yankee fan. Given the, er, "roll" the Sox are on right now, I just knew Mahty was going to make a visit sooner or later. He got my day off to a sour start - I haven't really gotten that turned around yet. Maybe some good 'Bama ribs for dinner tonight (after the sunset) will turn the corner for me. Probably not, though.

Hopefully by the all star break we'll have something fun to yak about. Sorry Bob ;0

Oh, and Fuck You again, Mathty. I hate Nirvana (7th panel). Pearl Jam for me.

Jeff in NC said it best, I'll take the roller-coaster over the turnpike ride any day. Strip does capture the essence of Spankee fandom however.

As is often the case, I woke up at around 3am with Marty's voice rattling inside my head... never did get back to sleep.


Unfortunately for the rest of you, the only way I can clear Marty out of my head is to write his words down and send them out to the strip.

I bought OOTP 11 last week - the ultimate baseball sim and played through the 2010 season over the weekend, with me as manager / GM for the Sox. FWIW, we were 5-10 games out most of the year and suffered a lot of injury problems. We got on a roll late and swept the Skanks in the final 3 games to take the Division. In simland, Big Papi bounced back with a 300/20/100 season, Lackey and Beckett both won 20 games, Wakefield announced his retirement mid-season with an ERA over 9.00, and Dice-K was 4-11 or something like that.

Haven't had time to start the playoffs yet.

every one of us knows a Mahty... and we hate him right now... cause there's not a damned thing to say to him that would be accurate other than, "fuck you" and that has just ZERO teeth right now. ZERO.

*sigh*

Aww f***! I just remembered this MFY yankee fan that has been yelling at me from the beginning of the season - "It'll be over by the Marathon". I don't mind so much that it might be over- it's the fact that he may be right that kills me.

Exactly right, Jim. Hence my big F-You's to Marty -- I got nothin' else. Sadly, that's as impotent as Marty without his little blue pill.


Fuck...

@ Rob, Jeff and I will be enjoying Pearl Jam next Saturday. I'm so busy working for Jazz Fest I can pretend that I'm oblivious to the Sox struggles. lc, lots of banjos on the schedule this year.


Oh, and fuck you Marty.

So cool, NOLA! Wish I could join you. I was jealous of your discussion of last year's event. Nothing like live music. I used to enjoy it so when my folks lived in NOLA and I had an excuse to visit. Hope you all have a great time!


And as always, fuck you Marty!

This team is getting hard to watch.

Fuck Pearl Jam. At least Cobain had the decency to kill himself before he became an intolerable asshole. If only Eddie Vedder sang and didn't talk.

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