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The Situation Strikes Out Looking

Doug:
With dissolution of A-Rod's l'affaire Hudson, 2010 is already looking bettah than the previous year.

 

Mike:
Seriously.

 

Mike:
Having to enduah anothah season in which every series with the Yankees was accompanied by a dozen or so camera shots of the dimwitted Kate Hudson sitting in a field box while wearing the look of being the greatest lifelong Yankee fan of all time would have ruined my friggin summah.

 

Doug:
I think I found A-Rod a new girlfriend.

 

Mike:
Who, Elaine Spottswood.

 

 

Doug:
I mean, c'mon, how perfect is that?

 

Mike:
Speaking of The Jersey Shore, I bet A-Rod is kicking himself that he didn't think to call himself "The Situation."?

 

Comments

heh. the situation...

"Boys, I need you to come down to the beach. We have uhselves a situation ovuh heuh. You know that homo we have to play baseball against from the other side of town? You know, Ass Rod I think is his name? Some a yous call him Slappy Mcbluelips? Mother fucker probably has blue balls to go with em. Anyway, that boy thinks he is going to come down here and date all our girls and have them cheer for him in between blowjobs. So, boys, bring your girls with you. We're gonna go drink some beer and smoke some kind by the bonfire while the girls kick his ass."

Never has a television show featured more real reality than Jersey Shore.

That show alone should warrant a federal quarantine around New Jersey.

Mandatory viewing:

link

Too funny, my FB status update early this morning was that I feel horrifically left out of US pop culture these days because of my lack of exposure to Jersey Shore. But that's a bit like saying I feel horrifically left out of the free clinic because of my lack of exposure to Hep C.


Spottswood? Heh. Heh heh heh. (Just turned into Beavis there for a second).

*quietly mattes down his faux-hawk and wipes off his spray tan*

Damn.

Welcome back hb.

It's scary how many 30-40 year olds with families I know watched that show. I guess it's the same reason why people slow down for a wreck on the other side of the highway.

Are you guys finally on board with me to fire Theo or what? Unless Papi returns to form this team will not be fun to watch.

Go Pats!

Jeez Scott...I know it might be a little boring but if the Sox can blunt the offensive monster that is NY then shit I'll take my boring games over exciting losses.

I find defensive highlight reels more exciting than offensive ones.


Homeruns look like homeruns. But if you can't watch some of the insane throws across the diamond in the Beltre highlight reel making its way around the web and not get excited for some baseball, there's something wrong with you.

I agree, Kaz. It's almost Lowell-esque

Abby is addicted to Jersey Shore. I just watch because, uh, I'm forced to.


I don't think it's like watching a car wreck, Scott. More like viewing the resulting autopsy.

I do appreciate the amazing Lowelesque play but there is not one batter on this team that makes opposing pitchers nervous right now. The Sox teams of 2004 & 2007 won it with some pop in their bats. That's the key ingredient missing from this team so far. Maybe the trade deadline will be that. We can only hope.

Bob, are you going to be there on Sunday? I will be missing my first Pats home playoff game in a long time. So scream extra loud insults at Ray Lewis for me.

So you would have preferred they spend $125 mil on Holliday, who has yet to show he can hit in the American league? Or maybe sign Johnny Demon or Godzilla for left field? JBay simply wasn't going to happen without a fifth year, which would have been insane on Theo's part. This team will hit just as well as it did after VMart arrived, and give up fewer runs, especially on the left side of the field. Will they catch the mfy for the AL East? Probably not (unless the mfy get hit by an injuy bug), but they weren't going to no matter what available moves they made. They'll make the post season again, and then it's a toss up, with us having better pitching and defense.

Nice one Nat - Spottswood! heh.


Thanks for coming back for another season HB. Looking forward to a small ball year, pitching and defense, right?

Natalie, we think alike in re: Spottswood. She'll need to live up to her name if she's with Slappy. And I was happily oblivious to Jersey Shore until this afternoon.

Glad you're back, h.b. You give my unemployed ass a reason to get online, and I actually might go look at a job posting site after this.

I'll be screaming, Scott. Loudly enough (when the Pats are on defense) to have kindly-yet-oblivious 90-year-olds tell me to "keep it down, dag nab it."


Anyway, have a great weekend all. Hopefully we'll have something fun to yap about on Monday.

Or yak about.


I think the paddles shocked the k out of me.


as a non-Guido resident of new jersey I can tell you that sitting on the boardwalk in Seaside Heights during summer and watching the mook parade is more entertaining than Jersey Shore. It's like watching a battalion of walking paintbrushes and muffintops go by.

Nola, I have missed you most of all, Scarecrow! How are the gorgeous kids? When is the next Soxaholix reunion at Pete's? Bob, Abby, Nate and Peter, we have a gameplan for this coming summer?

In re: Jersey shore, I have to confess to spending time in Wildwood and Margate as a teen, begging homeless guys to buy us booze, contemplating tattoos and bungee jumping, flirting with guido lifeguards... ahh, to be 16 again. Not. Although Six Flags Great Adventure was awesome.

Wicked glad you're back HB. The winter was getting too long.

Just gotten back from Fenway a few hours ago; it was good to see an old friend.


Outdoor hockey is just fun to watch. I had seats in the loge boxes right behind home plate...decent for hockey, omgDamnRediculous for baseball.


Nobody ran out into the outfield to make snow angels (before being thrown out for trespassing). A little disappointing.


BU > BC.

Pitchers and catchers report in 35 days.
Good to find you back on line.

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