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The Ken Burns Effect

Bill:
Ah, Christ, just when I staht to soften up ovah the notion of Ken Burns wanting to chronicle 2004 run and its joyful aftahmath by asking fans to send in their personal photos I read this...

 

Bill:
You see it's not just any photo they have in mind but rathah "— that picture of a Red Sox cap on a gravestone of a loved one who didn’t live to see the day."

 

Mike:
Cue mournful John Coltrane solo.

 

Mike:
Fade into sepia photo of young woman in a 40's haircut in a flower dress standing outside Fenway...

 

Mike:
Dissolve to photo of Red Sox cap on a gravestone in late Autumn with the earnest voice over, "She lived to see Jackie Robinson break the color barrier and was present at Martin Luther King's 'I have a dream speech' but Adelia Murphy never had a chance to witness her greatest dream..."

 

Bill:
And if happens that ol Granny Murphs's dad was a scrappy Irish immigrant who worked on the Brooklyn Bridge, well, all the fuckin' bettah.

 

Mike:
Sigh.

 

Comments

Ha! If anyone ever needed a sendup, it's that creepy nostalgic man-child.

Hopefully SOMEDAY he'll have something fun to yak about :)

Wonder if part 2 will be as error filled as part 1.

Oh boy, a few more hour with that hottie Doris Kearns Goodwin and we'll all be on the Gentle Path with Tiger. Yeesh.

My Gramp, who died in '95, wasn't commemorated with a 'hat on headstone' pic. We bought a beer and a Cumberland Farms coffee and poured it out 'one for my homies' style. He would've liked that and likely scoffed at the sentimentality of anything else. Well, not scoffed, cos he was creamated. Puffed, maybe?

"Creamated"?...well, sure, I guess if you like your coffee "regulah".


As for the Ken Burns Effect: worst (and subsequently most overused) part of iPhoto ever.


I'll be in Cancun for a week starting tomorrow. So, hopefully we'll have something fun to yak about in February. :)

Burns is the Ron Jeremy of angst porn.

"The Civil War" is the single greatest thing that has ever, that's EVAH, been produced for television.*

That being said, he does give off a Stephen King sort of personal weirdness.

*Even more than Billy Crystal's "61" :)

Completely agree, J.O. The problem is that not all his chosen topics lend themselves as readily to Burns' "style" as did the Civil War series. I still watch my old VHS copies of the Civil War series. Wonderful stuff.


And by the way, Burns' "weirdness" is a family trait. I went to college with his brother Rick. Two peas in a pod...

Dearest Lisa, I write to you today from Fitchburg. Cap'n tells us only one in three will ride home after battle today, and gave us each an extra ration of rum. I killed Johnny Rebel for his, and took his rifle as well. Then I used the two firearms to slaughter my entire company, saving Cap'n for last. As I slit his throat with the pinky bone from Johnny Rebel's left hand, I thought of you my dear, and the softnes syour sweet touch brings. I pray that Mother never learns of this atrocity, or its meekness would surely drive her to the grave. That is all for now, dear Lisa. The sun begins its slow decent over Cap'n's nude, sexually violated body, and I have many more men to bunghole before my day is done. I remain always yours, (slow drumroll) K. Burns I.

OMG Bob. That was fantastic!!!!!!


Damn-coffee on the screen again,thanks Bob ;D

'...and I have many more men to bunghole before my day is done.' Hello, Diet Pepsi all down my new shirt.

h.b.-can we get that on the next t-shirt??

>>h.b.-can we get that on the next t-shirt??

50 bucks to the guy who wears it to walmart

No beer cart today; a nice end-of-day/week meeting instead.


Delightful.


Anyway, have a great weekend all. Hopefully we'll have something fun to yak about on Monday.

FYI:


Mexico (at least Cancun) loves the Red Sox. Leaving the airport, wearing my Red Sox t-shirt, and getting nearly every porter to yell out things like "HEY! Manny Ramirez!" (I point to Ortiz-34 on the back) "Daveed Ortiz!!"


Even had one Mexican porter want to talk to me about Matsuzaka being back and how things were looking up for the team this year...even though the Yankees won last year. Haha...I was having a hell of a time understanding what he was trying to tell me at first...until I realized it was "Matsuzaka" in a really steep Hispanic accent.

Red Sox, North America's Team, either that or they were hoping to grease you for a slightly larger tip. Very cool regardless.

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