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A thin watery porridge

Bill:
Ah, well, as much I'd have liked a sweep, 2 out 3 ain't bad. Besides, there's something fittingly droll about Juicy Fruit Giambi getting a walkoff.

 

Mike:
Wait a second, haven't you heard? We need to be beside ourselves in consternation as "an occult hand has reached into the wretched past and served one final bowl of gruel."

 

Bill:
Friggin' Shaughnessy, he just can't let go of the occult, phantasmagoric, supahnatural meme can he?

 

Mike:
So how hahd do you think it was for him to go with feint of the "occult hand from the wretched past" rathah than come right out and say what he really wants to, "The Curse Returns!"?

 

Bill:
The irony is that there is a mofo curse and it's the CHB himself and we're damned to all eternity to be stuck with him.

 

Mike:
Seriously, the Red Sox could win 3 consec World Series, and there'd be Shaughnessy, hunched ovah his keyboard, waiting, waiting, for a low moment to unleash.

 

Bill:
He's like the friggin herpes virus. You go years with a picture perfect penis and then one day, whoops, you've got a one way ticket to soreville.

 

Mike:
Of course, the news about Beckett feels like waking up with an STD.

 

Bill:
Yeah, seeing the doctor is "just a precaution." Right. Kinda like how the Russian troops in Georgia are just a precaution.

 

Mike:
But, you know, it's the Friday befoah a long weekend, the ol' man's letting us go at noon, and there's an entiah Septembah of baseball left …

 

Bill:
Yeah, somehow I think we'll find a way to carry on.

 

Mike:
You know what they say, "When the occult hand serves you gruel, eat it and shut the fuck up."

 

Comments

The old man's letting you go at noon?

Okay, I'll go with that.

Actually, our Old Man (and every other boss) is out of the office on vacagtion today.

(Noon sounds good. Pete's Pub anyone?)

Oh, and I still despise Juice-ambi. "I'm sorry I do drugs. Not gonna stop because you don't test for HGH, but I'm soooo sorry."

The only good news is the juice has made his balls the size of garden peas and he's going to die of some odd cancer before he's 50.

Good times, good times.

(The drunk man says what the sober man thinks.)


Yeah, ol' man Scrivener, the C level boss, is letting the characters out of their cubes at noon.

As for Giambia, don't take Bill's comment to mean affection for Giambi or anything of the sort. It's more that it just seemed amusing in an odd, hard to describe, way that Giambi was the guy to do it.

"picture perfect penis" ???!!!

i like how that sounds...

and bob,

all that stuff about steroids making testicles the size of garden peas is nonsense.

why don't you start hating on all the other baseball players who used steroids? because it is most of em, you know

I wish an occult hand would grab Danny boy by his garden pea sized nads :)

Believe it or not this upcoming series with our cousin Sox will be more important that the MFY series.

Why? Well the Wild Card to be precise. If we can keep the train rolling and if Toronto can lick its wounds and lay some beatdown on the MFY, then we might have ourselves a 7, 8, or even 9 (if we're lucky and the BP stops fucking up) game advantage, further shutting the Yanks down.

So, Lisa, your testicles are still big, despite your HGH use? :)

Actually, that isn't a load of nonsense. I work at an ad agency that specializes in health care and physician-targeted work. We have a few docs on staff in fact.

They all tell me that not only does HGH (and steroids) shrink balls, they cause all these weird, unusually placed cancers.

I don't hate on other players unless they've been caught or admitted to using the juice.

You know, the whole innocent until proven guilty thing.

Juice-ambi drives me crazy because he gets love for "apologizing."

"Sorry, Mrs. Tate."


It is fitting (from a historical perspective) that the Yankees win this final contest against the Sox in the Stadium. I think A-Rod needs to grow a porno moustache - it works for Giambi. A-Rod goes 0-4, leaves four men on base. Must be crying in Madonna's pad this morning (all tied up with Madonna standing over him wearing leather boots and a whip).

Ok guys who's up for some analysis?

I recently reviewed the Sox schedule, factored in Beckett's mess, and the trends we have with certain teams. We're lucky seeing how we don't play the Angels while NY does. We also play Tampa six games which, if all goes according to plan, could help us ascend to the AL East. TB also plays NY and despite what many people want, I want TB to win. Just because the MFY are 6GB doesn't mean they're 100% out. I want them 100% out. Beckett's troubles concern me but I hope David Pauley can provide some good backup as he recovers. It's probably a good thing since Toronto spanked us when we discovered he was injured.

The Yankees have a tough schedule with the Rays (yes I'm rooting for the Rays again), the Jays (who just LOVE the Yankees), the Orioles (50/50), and those lovable Angels. If everything works out those four teams will dole out some serious damage even with our own troubles.

The White Sox and Twins are our concern now. We need them to slip and fall while we ascend. When the Yanks are 100% done then I'll be hoping for the downfall of TB 24/7.

Oh and screw CHB and his gruel.

Slipping the phrase, "It was if and occult hand..." by the copy desk in a news story is a prerequisite for membership in what, pre-Google, was one of the most secret societies in journalism, The Order of the Occult Hand. The tradition goes back 40 years or so and the phrase has appeared in many newspapers under many bylines.
Check it out @ http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Order_of_the_Occult_Hand

re the "occult hand" it now looks like this is one of those times were I owe Shaughnessy a tip of the hat for being creative.

By putting that phrase in he's working on another level than I (via the characters) had assumed.

And thanks, slack, for pointing out the Order of the Occult Hand.

No tip of the hat to CHB! As the article points out, the members changed the secret phrase in 2006. He ain't in no secret club.

This is probably just honest to god awful purple prose.

No way it was "god awful prose." A check of the Globe archives shows he had used the "occult hand" reference before (1986), as did a few other Globe scribes, including M.R. Montgomery, twice (1989, 1995), John Powers (1987), and Paul Langner (1982). It first appeared in the Globe in a non-bylined political piece on January 25, 1981, referring to a dearth of news coming out of the Legislature. And phrase change or not, it's still worth trying to get it by the desk if only because it's more challenging now that more folks know about the Order.

Order or no, the occult hand cliche is stupid and juvenile, therefore right up Sure-nuff-sleaze's alley. Why try to be creative or inform your readers when you can just throw out a dumb "secret society" in-joke or quote a 45-year old Bob Dylan song for the 750th time? Shaughnessy's occult hand is where it usually is, and I've got a feeling it's nowhere near picture perfect.

So what you're saying is we all got an occult hand job :)

not to change the subject gangs, but i think this confirms McCain is a dirty old man:

VPilf.com

Have a great (long) weekend, all.

Hopefully we'll have something fun to yak about on Monday. Or Tuesday.

Buckner and I are going to the game Wednesday afternoon.

But it's strickly plutonic. Really.

And now, I shall drink.

damn, Bob-
but this is our first date without Kaz and/or sdu to chaperone! We'll be at Copperfield's around 11:30ish if anyone would care to join us for *ahem* "lunch". Probably afterward too, if I know Bob. Bring your own sriracha.
Good weekend, all.

HAVE FUN YOU GUYS.

meh. enjoy it

lc

And tonight's game is exactly why I'm not worried about the White Sox.

And tonight's game is also exactly why I'm not worried about the White Sox.

Maybe you should worry about the White Sox, now that Becky the Dunce may be vp

Nah, still not worried. Even today's game came down to the last out for them to win.

Becky the Dunce used to be a sports announcer, by the way.

You hangin'in there Nolasox ?

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