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Suffer the children

Unknown Yankees fan:
Has an 8½ game deficit ever seemed so inconsequential?


The Yankees are like Ceasar on the north bank of the RubiconAlea iacta est.


Unknown Yankees fan:
If you listen closely to our own North, you can hear the worry beads clattering.


The spring meadow seemed so pleasant for grazing, now, scent of wolf in the air, the sheep are bunched and nervously hesitant.


Unknown Yankees fan:
At times like these, I almost have a pitiful condolement for Red Sox fans. I mean, there but for the grace of God go I.


Reminds of the time when I was a kid, during the so-called "Impossible Dream" season, where even in Yankee leaning Greenwich a bit of Red Sox fever had taken hold … So I came home one day wearing a Red Sox cap.


I'll never forget the look of consternation in my dad's eyes when he saw me in it, "Son," he said, "we need to have a serious talk."


"You're old enough now to hear this, Martin," he continued gravely. "In life there are two types of people — winners and losers."


"And every decision you make in life, even the ones that seem inconsequential, like rooting for a ball club, all conjoin over time to point you toward an eventual outcome as a loser or as a winner."


"Now, son," my dad asked with all earnestness, "which do you want to be? The choice is yours."


And so ended my brief exposure to the sad malady of always being on the wrong side of supremacy.


Unknown Yankees fan:
Father knows best.





Gaul is a province. Gaul is divided into three parts...

With credit to Lou:

Ups and Downs

Have at it.

Ahhhhh, Yanks fans are crawling out of the woodwork like the termites they are. Love it! Welcome back, youse guys.

And hey while you're here, who has the best record in baseball? What's that? Didn't catch what you said. Can you repeat it?

Wherefore art thou, paddy24?

What do you guys think about benching Lugo and starting cora at short?

HB, I thought for sure the today's final panel would depict Marty's voice coming through Bill's answering machine.

There but for the grace of God go I.

I was thinking the exact same thing, Mahty. Because there's winners, losers, and assholes. And when I want to hear from an asshole, I'll fart.

Perfer et obdura; dolor hic tibi proderit olim. (Be patient and tough, some day this pain will be useful to you).

We "losers" have put in our time and come out the better for it. I pity the assholes who are MFY fans who have not the patience or toughness to persevere that they must act as if they aren't the ones that just barely reached above 0.500 finally halfway through June.

What a terrible beating at the hands of the stinking Rockies. I can't even give away the great seats my company owns. Customers, friends random people on the street nobody is interested. And then last night we had to take crap from the Colorado "fans" that were out downtown watching the game.

Scott I will take those seats. I will be in Boston the weekend of July 13-15 for a wedding and would love tickets to the day game sunday.


I'd rather have won 11 of my last 13 than 5.

But I'd also rather be up 8.5 games over my closest division rival. It's not time for Yanks fans to gloat. Yet.

Best record in baseball is hanging by a thread now for the first time in weeks.

I knew we were in trouble with The Sopranos finale when the HBO series ROME ended (!) with the triumph of Gaius Julius Caesar Octavianus, who would become the first emperor of the Roman Empire (Augustus). I mean it's not like there are VOLUMES of history from that point in time (the birth of Pax Romana) to the fall more than 300 years later...

We didn't really expect to maintain a 13.5 game lead did we? I think it'll be more fun if we let them creep close and then crush their spirit at the end.

Ut Cognascant Te.


I live in Denver and the seats are in Coors Field. You are welcome to the seats if your travels take you here.

Schilling has magnanimously agreed to accept $13 million to return for next season. Coming on the heels of last night's turd sandwich, that's awfully generous of him.

Maybe Arroyo isn't the one who should have been nicknamed "Saturn Nuts."

"What do you guys think about benching Lugo and starting cora at short?"

I'm for it. Francona has been patient enough with Lugo and Cora deserves a shot. Lugo's turning into Rent-a-wreck Part 2: The Return of Mediocrity.



I wasn't really paying attention. There are no free tickets to Fenway.

Thanks anyways though.

Lugo's turning into Rent-a-wreck Part 2: The Return of Mediocrity.

Of all of Theo's many questionable moves, his handling of the shortstop position has been perhaps the worst. Obviously, Nomar had to go, but Cabrera was a great replacement. Just re-sign him! Nope, let's overpay for Renteria instead.

I don't hold the trade of Hanley Ramirez against him, because it was necessary to get us Beckett and Lowell. However, I don't understand why they didn't just bring back A-Gon. Sure, he wasn't a very good hitter, but he's the best defensive SS in the game. Lugo can't hit or field.

Who do you think Theo will bring in next year, after we pay another team to take Lugo off our hands and he goes on to hit .320 in his new environs?

It's pretty simple, if we don't find a solution at short, center and right, the lead's gone by the ASB. The pitching has been great, but we can't win when 1/3rd or more of our lineup is completely unable to get a hit or get on base.

Lugo was a bust, and anyone who knows anything about baseball (which doesn't include our GM) should've known he sucked before we signed him. Crisp is a joke we never should've wanted, and Drew... I like Drew, but Pena needs some ABs as well.

Lugo is 4 for 58 by my count, Crisp batting under Mendoza in June after a wretched April and May. One of the few rays of sunshine is Schilling and Matsuzaka's BABIP being in the .320s, which is a great sign all things considered.

"I'm for it. Francona has been patient enough with Lugo and Cora deserves a shot. Lugo's turning into Rent-a-wreck Part 2: The Return of Mediocrity."

Me too. Cora seems to play pretty solid D and with steady playing time I think his bat will be right where it was to start the season.

Beckett is awesome but I still wish we had hung on to Hanley. Or Cabrera.

Wait didnt Pedrioa play shortstop in Pawtucket?

No offense to second guessers, but I'm not upset at this lineup really. Sure, a few people need to start contributing but it's not like Lugo or Crisp cost us last night.

This team is founded on some seriously solid pitching and if 2004 taught us anything it's that pitching wins games, the hitting will be there when needed.

If 1/3 of our lineup is barely contributing, then 2/3 is getting the job done. The bad days are when the 2/3rds aren't cutting it and the 1/3rd aren't helping either...and really, you're not going to win with only 1 out of 3 cylinders firing. Even if we do 0.500 ball for the rest of the season, we're winning 90 games. Sure that's not enough, so we have to do better than 0.500 ball, but I think this team has shown itself more than capable to do so.

The root of "Martin's" douchebaggery has been exposed - that extra close relationship with his father, perhaps a little too close.

There's skeletons in those Greenwich closets.

I hate the 'EEI hindsight, knee jerk whiner crap - BUT never was happy with Lugo. I got on board for Renteria - but c'mon get me out of this turnstile.

As Frank Vincent's character says to the arab diamond dealer in "Casino": "Let's talk turkey": the Red Sox are up by 8.5 games and will not play like this for an extended period of time.

(by the way, nothing on film will ever top the baseball bat job on Nicky Santoro and his brother Dominic for brutality...never ever)

The probability of the Yankees catching them is still considerably less than 50%.

Unless that was a reverse-gooch attempt, JO, thanks. Once again you prove that not all Spank fans are knuckle-draggers!

Scott, I live two block from Coors Field. I'll happily take any tickets you're trying to get rid of.

No Ike, I'm not "poor-mouthing" you Lou Holtz-style, i.e., "I'm really concerned about this Navy team," then Notre Dame kicks their ass 48-3.

The first 55 games or so is a large enough sample to conclude that a Red Sox collapse is extremely unlikely.

"(by the way, nothing on film will ever top the baseball bat job on Nicky Santoro and his brother Dominic for brutality...never ever)"

I thought the scene where they have that guys head in a vice and his eyeball pops out/ruptures was pretty brutal as well. hehe. *barf*

For what it's worth, I'm not on the second-guessing, "Fire Theo!" bandwagon. I'll be the first to state that the guy has made a lot of brilliant moves over the years.

But as far as his handling of the shortstop position, it's been one head-scratching move after another.

And I don't think the team's going to collapse (regardless of whether or not Lugo is a bust) and for much the same reason that others have already stated: pitching, pitching, pitching. The return of Lester will only improve a team strength.

Still, Schilling could've picked a better time than the morning after a horrendous start to inform us that he'd "accept" thirteen million dollars to pitch here next year.

No offense to second guessers, but I'm not upset at this lineup really. Sure, a few people need to start contributing but it's not like Lugo or Crisp cost us last night.


1). he botched the first batter of the game, on what should've been an easy out. Curt throws 10 more pitches than he would've otherwise.

2). in the second, after Lowell screwed up those 2 (albeit tough) grounders, Lugo gets an inning-ending grounder about 5' away from him, and he's not even close to getting it. 2 runs score, 10 more pitches.

3). 1 out, runners at the corners, Lugo up. Lazy pop foul, out #2. Crisp comes up, shockingly doesn't get a hit.

obviously it's easy to look back at what could've been, but Lugo was a pretty big part of last night's loss. From my angle in Sec. 17, Lugo should've had both, easily, but he blew it. And their offense goes without saying.

Play Pena in center, play Cora at ss, just so we might get some production. Lugo and Crisp are hopeless.

Woah! Pena in center? Have you seen some of those defensive plays Coco has made this year? Coco is not quite as advertised, but at least hes not dragging us down defensively. I say put Cora at short for a couple a games and see how things go... but its waaaaaay to early to start Pena any where.

One game over .500
8.5 games out of first place.
4 games out of last place.
8 game streak that will come to an end very soon.

Call me crazy, but I'm really not too worried.

It's times like these that I remind myself of the Teutoburgerwald. :-)

Are people not seeing Coco's performance? He is hitting .221 .277 .295. If it's a backup catcher doing that, you're thinking of any way to replace him. As a starting player, it's unimaginable to keep a player that bad in the lineup.

He could never save enough hits with his glove as he's giving away with his bat. Pena is a butcher (though he's better in center than right), but his PECOTA line of .262/.328/.493 is a hell of a lot more palatable.

Sean- you can't just compare Coco's hits/runs saved vs. his own givebacks, but rather his saves minus givebacks vs WiMP's perceived added offense less HIS defensive givebacks. No way Wily makes up for his D inadequacies with his bat, compared with Coco's total game. And that doesn't even add in the element of speed that Coco occasionally brings. Don't get me wrong- Coco is totally lost at the plate right now, but he's still the better overall option v. Wily Mo. Lugo needs to sit, though. NOW

Blood pressure rising
Adrenaline starts to pump
Must be Marty time

Is it unhealthy to have so much vitriol reserved for a fictitious character?

Colonel Walter Kurtz
Robert E. Lee 'Bob' Ewell
Marty from New York

NV in SD - I wouldn't be worried either. But I would like to know, when would you start to get worried? It is only June 14th.

Sean O, what in the hell are you smoking? There's no reason to start Wily unless J.D. spontaneously combusts...and you want to put him in spacious, geometrically-challenged center field?? The #1 etiquette rule ("batting leadoff for the rules of nine...") in Fenway Park is to not touch balls in play...and I think Pena takes it to heart every time he's on the field.

As for Lugo, his BA may be crap, but evidently his hits were worth every one of them. He's 3rd on the team in RBIs at 34 and when he does get on, he puts himself into scoring position with 18 for 18 steals (team leader). I think a lineup shake-up will do him good.

And if we're talking Coco, then we're talking "are we getting value over Damon?". Their stat lines look almost identical so far this year yet Coco has provided about 200 more innings of defense than Johnny has. Oh and we're paying Coco $5 million a year and JDamon is bilking NY for $13 million a year.

Just keep repeating to yourself:

"We're the best team in baseball...we're the best team in baseball..."

No, actually, we can. So far this season, Coco is at -6.8 VORP, meaning he's cost us .7 wins compared to an average AAA player. Pena, despite never starting, having a set position, or getting in a groove, is at a meager but acceptable 1.1.

Last year, Pena was just slightly below average in center (better than Crisp, oddly enough), and in just 300 ABs had a 14.3 VORP.

So, assuming things go as they are, and if Pena played he'd roughly approximate '06, doing this for the remainder of '07:

Pena: 14.3 VORP, + 1 FRAR = 15.3 runs
Crisp: -14 VORP + 17 FRAR = 3 runs

Crisp sucks, and Pena is a league-average center fielder, like it or not. Crisp is hitting historically badly right now, and considering how little defense matters in the grand scheme of things, you need to score some runs.

We never should've wanted Crisp, since he was obviously playing over his head in Cleveland. When we do finally get rid of him, good riddance, Ellsbury will be owning center by then.

For over a week, I was SO good. Honest. But Marty is my brother in arms, and I couldn't leave him twisting slowly in the wind. I just dropped by to say hi, remind you that the characters are fictional and answer Natalie's question.

Nat, YOU guys have the best record in baseball. If there were a trophy for best spring performance, you would win it hands down, right here, right now.

For the record, I don't foresee a Red Sox collapse either. But a stunning Yankee renaissance? Time will tell...

"...In June they start to contemplate
July's first torrid breaths of fate..."

Bye for now. I have to gather my ragged Montagnard army to regroup for our next raid. There are stakes that need fresh heads.

PT aka CWK

Sean, I'm not disputing your stats, and again, I am not defending Coco. VORP is an offensive stat, and I concede Pena might give you more offense than Crisp, although in within those 300 AB you propose for him you'd get ~115 K's, many of them in crucial situations. But don't kid yourself into thinking that he's anywhere near an 'average' outfielder defensively. Use your eyes, not your computer. Coco's total game is still out best option

I see Bill Mueller is the new LA hitting coach.

Good for him...I always liked Billy Mueller.

It's not healthy, how much I want Bill to just punch Marty in the face whenever the Red Sox clinch the division (this year or ten years from now...).

I envision it as approximately a three-panel strip.

1: Bill calls from nowhere in particular.

2: Marty answers.

3: Bill is punching him in the face, having been just outside his apartment/office.

I have one wretched, dickhead Yankee fan in my office, and I'd like to see him punched in effigy, is what I'm saying.

don't forget panel 4, or maybe the intro panel: Lisa sitting at her Mac; "Bill Callaghan is unavailable at the moment. He is out of town of business"


Shoot me an e-mail to discuss the Rockies tickets.


6-0 --- fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck

7.5 games in front....groan

Please, make the bleeding stop in the next 7 days. PLEASE MAKE IT STOP.


Or as Dory says in Finding Nemo: just keep swimming, just keep swimming, just keep swimming ....

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