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Now with 100% More Batshit!

Doug:
OK I so need to lay off the game time bongs hits 4 Jesus — last night I swear I saw Manny Ramirez transmogrify into Willy Mays and make nonchalant oh-so-cool waist high basket catches in left.

 

Mike:
Heh. Yeah, welcome to the new bizzaro Red Sox world where Batshit Tavarez pitches 7 shutout innings, allowing just 3 hits, 4 SOs, and a single walk.

 

Doug:
Did I mention how rathah fond I'm becoming of Batshit?

 

Mike:
Seriously. Even the nickname "Batshit" has gone from a term of derision to one of endearment.

 

Mike:
And how about Coco Crisp who now has homahs from both sides of the plate this series?

 

Doug:
I confess I went all DSS v Haleigh Poutre on wanting to rush to pull the plug on Crisp for the assumed permanent vegetative state he was in at the plate.

 

Mike:
Meanwhile, we are back to the double digit lead in the AL East. Sweet!

 

Doug:
And, oh, yeah, somewhere in flyovah country Sammy Sosa hit his 600th homerun. Ooh, the excitement of it all.

 


Mike:
Well, you know, those Rangahs fans were probably going to celebrate until they discovered someone had taken all the cork out of the champagne bottles for goodness knows what nefarious purpose. Oh, well …

 

Author's Notes:
The photo of the crowd shot from Arlington is from the Dallas Morning News and is part of a photo gallery of Sosa's 600th homer. But since the gallery is in Flash, and I couldn't isolate the single photo to link to it, I had to co-opt it via screen shot.

Comments

Bat Shit Tavares

Pitches another great game

Then punches haiku

1. I get a Manny skull cap
2. Manny goes from baggy pants to Vtek sox look
3. Manny catches fiyah.

Coincidence?

I think not.

lc

The MFY throw Clemens out today to halt a two-game skid. A great opportunity to get the full measure of this signing. The frosting on the cake would be a Clemens implosion (or a re-fatiguing of the groin) by the third inning.

With a tip 'o the cap to Bob for the inspiration, another Tavarez haiku:


Setting down the Braves
with ease, a summer evening
"¡Watchela! I fuck you up!"

a Clemens implosion (or a re-fatiguing of the groin) by the third inning.

which will be blamed on the thin air of the Rockies, not Old Man Clemens being... well... and old man.

Though I am a Braves fan living in Georgia, I have enjoyed following the Soxaholix and the Red Sox. My wife is from Hartford-bless her heart, she did not know what she was getting into when she married a Southern Boy. As an anniversary/birthday gift we went to the 6/19 Braves/Red Sox game in Atlanta. She LOVED it. She grew up going to Fenway every year and though it was in Atlanta-it did bring back good memories. As for the Braves-what were they smoking 6/20? At least we had one win in the series. Keep up the good work.

BTW, I thought Kitty Carlisle died earlier this year. What was she doing on the mound last night?

Oh. Yeah. Dying again.

Does anyone have a video of Tavarez' first AB yesterday? It was hilarious. It seemed like he was imitating a different batter at each pitch (at one point he was trying to do a Ichiro).

We are going to steamroll through San Diego and send the Padres back to their monastery.

H.B.

I thought you would be a Rescue me fan and see a reference to the soxs comment in the show last night

it was asking him (probie) what chance the mother had "are you saying slim like being 3 down to they yankees in the post season"

What a great line from Rescue Me.

I confess that despite what seems like a great show with a great cast, I've let Rescue Me pass me by.

Is there anyone who can attend the El Guapo Bobble Belly giveaway on July 26th in Nashua? I will pay a reasonable sum to get it for my sister.

http://www.nashuapride.com/promotions/index.php?promid=124

WTF with the ESPN commentator's conspiracy theory on Tavarez wanting the keep the ball at the end of the inning and his OCD rubbing of his cap and head. Enough already.

l.c.,

Until you get the Manny dreds, I'm not sufficiently impressed.

--Mike

I've been all about Sexy Lips for months now. He's easily our mascot now, with all due respect to Wally.

Last Friday I was by the Pesky Pole for BP while Labios Attractivos was warming up (with my Tavarez shirt on, of course). The guy next to me fell out of the stands to get a grounder and almost got kicked out, by Tavarez came over, gave the guy a ball he was carrying, and said "you play hard man, you do good, always play hard man" and kept repeating it.

One of the most surreal experiences of my life.

Maybe you meant just 15 Rangers fans in attendance.

Rest of the fans at Rangah's Ballpahk were rooting for the Cubs last night. I was there Tuesday and it sounded like either the Sawx or Yankees were in town.

Getting back to the Sawx, nice to see that divisional lead swell back into the double digits thanks to our starting pitching and the bats finally breaking out.

Speaking of psycho fans...anyone catch the chick who was just about popping out of her shirt after Hinske's homer. He's giving everyone hi-5's and she's pouring over her shirt & onto the dugout.

Had to rewind on the Tivo to show the wife the kind of spirit we're looking for.

Sonoma Sox, thanks for the heads up and thank Tivo for the "recently deleted" folder. I'ma have to recover the game and check it out. "[P]ouring over her shirt & onto the dugout" gets my attention.

Nice to watch a game on real TV instead of through the computer (MLB.TV). All I could think of while watching last was the comments here yesterday about the Braves fans thinking they were going T-Off on Batshit.

I had a big grin on my face the whole game starting from the first at bat.

By the way, speaking of the first at bat, Nancy Drew made the front page of the LA Times sports section today. The title is "Bland in Boston".

//By the way, speaking of the first at bat, Nancy Drew made the front page of the LA Times sports section today. The title is "Bland in Boston".//

Did they accompany that with a picture of Drew dancing in the dugout with Wily Mo, Ortiz and Manny?

Perhaps it's L.A. that has the problem and not Drew.

I heard that Old Man Clemens needed an oxygen tank when he arrived in Denver today.

And then he crapped in his pants and had to get Andy Pets It to help him clean up.

HB,

What's with the code I have to punch into my keyboard before I post?

This appears to be a recent development on your site...

Maybe it's not a coincidence that we don't hear from "Manny" and his autograph-signing extravaganzas anymore. I don't know why I wouldn't want Manny to sign my Sox memorabilia!

SoCal, where do you live? I went to Loyola Marymount.

BTW, I'm such a pig that I just scavenged the botton (or top) piece of bread leftover from a sandwich in the kitchen. It had a little pesto spread on it.

Lunch.

So why do I look like a handsome, stunning John Goodman?

The code is an anti-spambot thing. It will pop up whenever you add a link to a comment or if you comment successively in some limited period of time.

I can't thank the Sox enough for winning in the fashion they did yesterday.

I learned that my grandfather passed away last evening while I was on my way to buy dinner and groceries while listening to the second inning on the car radio. It wasn't sudden for Pop and most of the family was with him at the time. He went quickly and peacefully for which I'm glad.

About the same time, Papi blasted his two run shot making it 7-0. It was nice to have some good news to focus on and help me deal with my situation at the time.

The Red Sox and my grandfather were never related. He was more into football and even then he never really showed much fandom for the Ravens or any other team. It might have had to do with the fact that he moved around quite a lot, being an army man, when my mom's family was young. For myself, though, it was good news yesterday on an otherwise somber evening.

I'm heading out of town for Maryland to help with arrangements and everything. Wierd, because I'll be turning 30 on Sunday (after, not amid, the arrangements fortunately). Doubly wierd, because I'm nearly gainfully employed again and should be starting my new job soon. But if life didn't throw us these twists how could we ever consider it living, I guess. Funny, I guess I can see the past Sox "June Swoon" in the same light when it comes to the life of being a fan.

It's good to see they've pulled out of it and back into that winning swing of things. I'll be sure to do the same and be back sooner than you know. Take care all.

Take care Kaz. RIP Pop.

PS - h.b., I've run into the anti-spambot code plenty of times when I insert links, but now it's coming up every post (regardless of how often I'm posting). You may want to see if they didn't default your CAPTCHA settings on typepad to "every post" instead of "links and rapid posting only" or something. Good luck debugging it, but it's definitely different for us right now.

Prayers and best wishes, Kaz.

My deepest condolences, Kaz. Take care, both you and your family.

Condolences Kaz.

I watched parts of all three Atlanta games from the bar at the Westin Waterfront in Boston. It was fantastic to be watching the game among kindred souls, even it was just the bahtendahs.

BTW, I too get the captcha every single time I post.

Now this is weird. The post above, where I state that I always get the captcha, is the first comment in weeks here where I didn't get the turing test.

We got the frosting on the cake - Rockies sweep and Rocket takes the loss.

Gotta love dem rockies!

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