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Love the Jenn-Air

Bill:
"Hi, I'm Manny Ramirez. I bought this AMAZING grill for about $4,000 and I used it once … But I never have the time to use it because I am always on the road. I would love to sell it and you will get an autographed ball signed by me =]"

 

Doug:
Gotta love that pic of Manny in his bare feet.

 

Bill:
I don't know why, but the image of Manny Ramirez as mastah of the grill and flipping burgers in the backyahd really tickles me.

 

Doug:
But I see Manny as more of the charcoal and lightah fluid kind of guy, you know, creating a Vesuvius in the thing and scaring the piss out of all his neighbahs.

 

Bill:
Heh. And his wife yelling, "Manny Ramirez if you burn this house down, so help me, you'll be Manny Being Ass-whooped Manny!…"

 

Doug:
Meanwhile, Manny says he doesn't talk to the media because "I don’t like to give opinions."

 

Bill:
Can't say I blame him. Our culture is awash in opinions already.

 

Doug:
Totally. But I can't help but want to bust Manny's balls now, but having people just asking his opinion on everything, especially totally random, out of the blue kinds of things.

 

Bill:
Yeah, imagine Shaughnessy yelling across the Red Sox lockah room: "Hey, Man-Man … you think these pants make my butt look big?"

 

Comments

Should I add $1 to put the bid at an even billion?

Don't want to ruin my perfect Feedback rating though.

Uh, make that $100 million. (I dn't usually deal with dollar amounts that large.)

The best part of that story? It's apparently not even his grill, but a neighbor's!

The local media sux. I was watching ABC last night and the 11 o'clock news kept touting something dire with regards to the Sox - (ominous voice) "does this have the chance to submarine the Sox season???" In a panic, I wait to hear of some catastrophic injury to Schill or Tek or Manny or something... and WHAT is the f'ing story about? Matsuzaka being featured on the cover of SI. Thanks, guys, for giving me a heart attack over yet another media-driven "curse." A$$holes.

9/26/88
Slugger Dwight Evans goes 4-30 in the two-week span following his cover appearance.

http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/features/cover/2002/jinx/80s/092688lg.jpg

10/2/95
Mo Vaughn gets the cover treatment as the Red Sox enter the playoffs. He goes 0 for 14 in the Indians' three-game sweep of Boston.

http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/features/cover/2002/jinx/90s/100295lg.jpg

3/5/01
Days after Nomar Garciaparra of the Boston Red Sox appeared on SI's cover, it was announced that he had split a tendon in his right wrist.

http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/features/cover/2002/jinx/00s/030501lg.jpg

Thanks for the links, Billy. Just out of curiosity, how many OTHER athletes graced the cover between 9/88 10/25 and 3/01?

I'd like to hear Manny's thoughts on the Bong Hits 4 Jeebus Supreme Court oral arguments.

And yes, those pants DO make CHB's ass look fat.

Whoa, Billy. It took you under 10 minutes to go back through 20 years of SI covers to come up with that? I'm impressed! I'd love to see your bookmark list. Holy shit, dude. You must have spent you entire offseason preparing for this blog post.

Using data of 47 years worth of SI covers, a 2002 report finds 62.8% of people who appear on the cover DO NOT have anything bad happen to them afterwards.

I'll take those odds.

Mickey Mantle appears on the cover of SI for the first time on June 18, 1956. Thirty-nine years later he dies. Definitely a curse.

And look what happened to poor Tyra Banks. She appears on the SI cover and 10 years later people are making fun of the size of her ass.

Look out Beyonce! The curse is a coming.

Somehow Manny's garage is everything I thought it would be :)

37.2% still seems pretty high, considering your one of the better players of your sport if your on the cover. The madden cover must crush this curse though.

Got to love the decadence of Rome err the USA. $4,000 friggin bucks for a stinkin grill.

Manny is still the best though.

Actually, the stand alone grills like that are low ball stuff. The truly big spenders have the full, built-in kitchens outside with fire burning brick ovens etc etc and those go for the 10s of thousands.

And while Rome burns, I'll confess that I've had a jones for an outdoor, stone pizza oven for some time.

...the last hope that a man relinquishes is that of a dinner; the poor wretches must buy their cabbage and their fuel. Meanwhile their lordly patron will be devouring the choicest products of wood and sea, lying alone upon an empty couch; yes, at a single meal from their many fine large and antique tables they devour whole fortunes. Ere long no parasites will be left! Who can bear to see luxury so mean? What a huge gullet to have a whole boar—an animal created for conviviality—served up to it! But you will soon pay for it, my friend, when you take off your clothes, and with distended stomach carry your peacock into the bath undigested! Hence a sudden death, and an intestate old age; the new and merry tale runs the round of every dinner-table, and the corpse is carried forth to burial amid the cheers of enraged friends!

To these ways of ours Posterity will have nothing to add; our grandchildren will do the same things, and desire the same things, that we do. All vice is at its acme; up with your sails and shake out every stitch of canvas!

-Juvenal, Satire #1, late 1st century AD

That was 1,900 years ago. Great analogy, Rome & us. How little human nature changes!

eBay took the auction down, so I don't get to see what it was.

In the meantime, Mrs. Ramirez looks really strung out on her MySpace pic.

So let me get this straight - Manny is demonized because he won't talk to the media. Schilling is demonized because he won't stop talking to the media.

I bought a sweet smoker that looks like a 55-gallon drum with a lid. I think it was maybe $150 at the Sports Authority (of all places). I've used it all of once to grill burgers and still have no earthly idea how to actually smoke anything. It now sits in my backyard, looking like a piece of faux-Gothick crap English people put on their .05 acres.

Hmm. A thought just occurred to me. Maybe BB or ER or someone of that ilk will be high bidder for the Jenn-Air. Then they can "Get all up in Manny's grill!!!!"

Thank you, thank you. I'll be here all week...

hb

Yes I have seen those arrangements. All part of increasing the "resale" value of one's house in today's day and age.

da kine

It is very easy to smoke ribs or other meat in one of those RTD2 type smokers or even the bigger one that you have. A dry rub on the ribs is the best way to go. It does take longer but is well worth it.

wtf. i missed mannys grille being mannys grille that totaly sucks ass dude

and speaking of curses the biggest jonah has to be cris "the mad dog" russo if he says your good your goin down the toity.. thank god hes on the yankees band wagon this year...and i quote" best yankee team in 25 years

Mothra pitched very well against the Pirates today, retiring 15 of the last 16 he faced. His line:

IP H R ER BB SO HR
5.2 1 1 1 1 7 0

mikeya2k1 and others who missed Manny on eBay: here's a pic from the page before it was taken down:

http://www.bostonist.com/attachments/boston_jon/mannysellinggrill.jpg

Thanks Bob, that's great. Might even use it as screen saver. Nuh, I'll stick with '10/27/04 11:40pm St Louis swing and a ground ball ...'(you know the rest especially as part of it - stabbed by Foulke - is to be your epitaph).

thanks bob much appreciated

hey downunder while thats a great one my wallpaer is the scoreboard at the end of the game 10/17/04 i still like the alcs ten times better than the w.s win and i loved the ws win gday mate

Sorry Mikey - I wasn't ignoring you, I've been flat out like a lizard drinking all day and haven't been back here since my early morning (AEST) post. But I agree with your sentiments - I watch game 4 and 5 alcs ALL THE TIME. I almost never watch the World Series. But that call by Joe just gets me - I just love how his voice almost breaks when he say 'He has it'. Gday to you.

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