Irasshaimase

Tara:
I love that the bid for D-Mat wasn't 51 million, wasn't 51.1 million, but was 51.11 million … It's like The Price is Right game show.

 

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Susan/Circle:
Theo Epstein come on down! You're the next contestant in the Boras Switcheroo Pricing Game.

 

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Tara:
Theo better have his Wonderjock on as the conventional wisdom says Boras is looking for 3yrs at $20 mil a year. Combine that with the 51.11 bid and that's a lot of yearning for yen.

 

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Susan/Circle:
Reports suggest the Yankees make $20 million a year marketing the Matsui brand in Japan … Of course those reports come from Scott Boras which is about as unbiased as getting reports on Israel from Al Jazeera.

 

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Tara:
Or getting sabermetric analysis from Joe Morgan.

 

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Susan/Circle:
Ouch.

 

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Tara:
But seriously. Matsuzaka vs Matsui, the gyroball vs juicy Giambi, Red Sox v Yankees, the greatest rivalry in all of sport? The Japanese fans are going to price that action like Kobe beef.

 

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Susan/Circle:
Yeah, and wait until the harajuku girls get a look at Quadzilla.

 

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Tara:
Ka-ching!

 

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Comments

[mary j]

I put this up in the other thread, just b/c I was right and I want all you boys to know it:

"Zimbalist estimated that the Sox might gain no more than $3 million a year by cashing in on the Japanese icon because they would be required under major league rules to equally distribute the vast majority of their earnings related to the merchandising of Matsuzaka with the 29 other teams."

"The bottom line is, I think there would have to be a lot of creativity involved on our end for the club to reap the financial windfall some have predicted," the Sox official said. "I'd contend this move is much more of a baseball decision than an economic decision."

This is clear a WTF decision, if they sign him. If the FO thinks they need to do this to compete, it could go downhill very quickly. Even if he's Pedro, the team still needs to fill many other holes. I just don't get it.

[Bob]

What does that "prove" other than the Sox are actually interested in winning? Your story is getting quite boring, Mary J. Let's hear your thoughts on the Wonderjock or my old college roommate's massive testicles. :)

BTW, it's time to come up with a nickname for our soon-to-be new pitcher. In honor of his mythical gyroball, I say we name him The Cyclone.

Not only does it reference his pitches' amazing movement, but also the "Cyclone Ranger" from "Turning Japanese."

(Yes, I know the song's about masturbation, but wearing this Wonderjock has me in the mood.)

[louclinton]

Love the Japanese fashion tips. The Sex Kitten style will sweep Newbury Street.

Not to go off on a tangent so early in the day (oh ok I will), but after watching a kickass FNL last night, I clicked over to NESN and watched the RS HOF dinner. Other than the fact that Imelda Marcos really looks good in the offseason. Still.......

Holy Fucking Christ on a Pony!!!
George Scott weighs six bills at least. And. Walks with a cane.
I am not making fun of the guy, he was such a sweet player, but honest to goodness, he was gignormous.

File under: Time is Such a Bitch.

ever youthful, and fit,

lc

[Ryan with a capital "R"]

Have all the Kobe beef you want, I'm in for the Mishima.
(The link is even semi-demi-related to Japanese baseball.)
http://72.14.209.104/search?q=cache:iccom.ironfans.net/98/98_e18.shtml

[Bob]

Ryan, I remember that episode. BTW, Sakai was the best chef of all of them.

[mary j]

It proves it wasn't a business decision - it was a baseball decision. And I think it was a piss poor one at that. The FO is not following their own, Pats-style dictates. Like I said, that's fine if Daddy Henry is using his wallet. It's just a completely different organization now. And one that is always worried about the present than planning a solid furture. The moves of the last season bear this out more so than anything else - trade the young and unproven for the older and proven, spend huge amounts of cash eeven when you don't need to (51 million when the nearest bid was $38 million), extension to Beckett and Crisp even as they hadn't earned them yet.

Hey, all's good if they win. But last year they didn't. And they still have a bunch of holes to fill. But they're going to spend $44 million on JD Drew?

[h.b.]

I'll second MJ's bit as becoming boring. We get it already: you don't like the deal. Lot of other folks with some pretty solid baseball bona fides in these matters do.

In any event, the bid has been made. Live with it.

[Dave S.]

Mothra! Mothra! Mothra!

Or how about King Ghidorah? That guy was a badass.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/King_Ghidorah

Or maybe Ultraman?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ultraman

I just like the outsized Japanese monster thing, especially considering that he's going to fight Godzira, and he's, well, Japanese.

[Bob]

How aout Tetsujin 28?

(What's his number BTW?)

[Ryan with a capital "R"]

Bob, that was one of the first episodes I saw. The idea of beef and chocolate just mesmerized me. I was totally hooked. I love Sakai, too, but Chen was always my faovrite. (In the Japanese version, I always rooted for the Iron Chefs, whereas with the American version, I usually root for the challenger.)

[mary j]

Wow, just cause you don't agree with me it's getting boring? Because you thought it was a business decision? I'll take Zimblast at his word well before anyone else.

But if everyone wanted to talk about how great DM is going to be, give him nicknames, and just get on your knees for a teabag of Theo's monster sack - that's exciting?

I just expected some levity around here. The Beckett deal I thought was a good one. I've learned my lesson. We'll see if I'm proved wrong. Considering that same money could have been used for Zambrano next year...oh what 51.11 million could have bought. This reaks as Theo's Katrina moment. I guess after last season he figured he had nothing left to lose

[Bob]

I guess Matsuzaka's number is 18. Shouldn't cost him much to pry that from Dustan Mohr.

Hmmm, 18. Quite a number in Red Sox lore.

[COD]

I tried to watch the HOF dinner last night - got the dreaded "This program is not available in your area" message from DirecTV.

WTF? How the hell is that part of the blackout deal in VA? Does anybody actually understand how the rules work with NESN and DirecTV work? As far as I can tell, the more I want to watch something on NESN, the less likely it'll be allowed.

[Bob]

It's not that we don't agree with some of what you're saying, MJ. In fact, I think paying Drew 44M is somewhat insane.

But let's move on. What's done is done.

Let's talk about how we think Tetsujin 18 will actually perform. Whether his gyroball is real or not. Performance stuff.

Because no matter what YOU think about it, he's gonna be a member of the Red Sox.

[Bob]

Here's a picture of Matsuzaka arriving in Boston, with Scott Boras at his side.

http://www.internationalhero.co.uk/g/gigantor.htm

[h.b.]

MJ,

You just keep flogging the dead horse. OK. You're right the deal sucks. Theo's an idiot.

Can we move on now?

You must be new to the comments here, because, for the most part, the comments tend toward the light and the humorous. If you want to get into a pitched argument on the merits or lack thereof of this deal or any other, then go over to a place like SOSH where that is their bread and butter.

If you wan't to talk about nicknames for D-Mat or the merits of the wonderjock or make fun of cuddle parties or express fascination for bonzai car crash art etc, well, then, irasshaimase to Soxaholix :)

[mary j]

Sure, but honest analysis seems required at moments like this. Indeed, when it's a good move, you all trip all over yourselves whipping it out for the bukkake party. The levity has been lost - I guess if you don't mind laying out even more cash at the old park for moves like this. Even when the ultimate product doesn't improve? What about all those folks who paid good money for meaningful baseball in September? So they can cheer Papi breaking the HR record?

Has firetheo.com been registered yet?

[COD]

Registrant:
Mellett, Keith
ATTN: FIRETHEO.COM
c/o Network Solutions
P.O. Box 447
Herndon, VA. 20172-0447

Domain Name: FIRETHEO.COM

[mary j]

That's the thing - no one here said that (characters, commeters, hb): This deal does suck. It is truly a WTF moment. I was just shocked I didn't get agreement on that. I'm done now. Back to your regularly scheduled programming.

[Dave S.]

Wow, Mary...I'm a Yankee fan, and you're depressing even me. The Red Sox are signing a guy who could become a true ace...scouts to SABR drool over this guy. Let time tell if the product improves or not...and as NV and others pointed out repeatedly yesterday, the money isn't even spent yet. This could prove to be a block move.

[harwich rich]

I'm still trying to get my gyroballs in my wonderjock :)

[harwich rich]

Sorry-things were just getting too damn serious around here.

[mary j]

Sure, that's the one saving grace - which I pray rings true - that it is a giant smoke screen. Even still, shouldn't they be focused on other things, like oh finding a SS, RF not named Drew, a few starting pitchers, a closer, and most of a bullpen?

And even if he turns out to be a true #1, which remains to be seen, it's still a terrible move. For the same money they could sign Zambrano next year and have 5 million left over on a yearly basis. Remember, Beckett was supposed to be a #1 that everyone drooled over, me included.

MFY fans should remember the last great American Ace search: from Weaver to Vazquez, to Unit. Those trades didn't work out so well did they? Pitching is iffy - always has been and always will be.

[louclinton]

Looks like mary j is "doesn't get the point" guy.

I think one point that is being missed is that the 51.11 million is not a salary number, and, therefore wouldn't count in the luxury tax figure. Feel free to correct me if I am wrong. Paying D-Mothra 15 mil a year would count against the luxury tax, but the 51.11 wouldn't be amortized over the term of the contract (in contrast to, say, NFL signing bonuses, which are). As I mentioned yesterday, I think the 51.11 is a fully justifiable investment by John Yen-ry to gain an instant share of an enormous market, much in the same way the 20 mil a year they spend in the DR for facilities is justified. And forget Bora$. He did us a favor by pricing JohnNY Demon out of the market. I miss him, but he ain't worth it. He'll be doing the George Scott cane walk by the end of the contract.

As for the nickname, see above: D-MOTHRA

I did put "mothra" and "eighteen" in a web-based nickname generator
[ http://links2love.com/nicknames.htm ], but the result was, let's say, unsatisfying for those of us who can't scratch the cash together for Wonderjock.

result:

Loveheart Hot-Baby Nuts

lc

[Natalie]

Count me as one who gives an unqualified "woot!" to this deal... I think it's exciting. It's exciting to finally be on the winning end of one of these big player showdowns. It's exciting to think, as Tara and Circle point out, of the Sox-Yanks rivalry taking over Japan (and thank you, h.b., for the never-gratuitous shout out to Tek's thighs; I pine, I perish). And it's exciting to think we could be watching a young "cool as a cucumber" pitcher with great stuff for the next three years. Any transaction is a gamble, and in the spirit of the Wonderjock, I like Theo's cajones here. Shit, the Sox have the money. To h.b.'s point yesterday, let's spend it (it's not as though my ticket prices go down if we don't)! There is no handicapping in baseball; we don't get bonus points at the end of the season for having the lowest payroll. Bring on the mythical gyroball...

[Kluv]

(*MJ: Just as a point of fact, your claim of "oh what 51.11 million could have bought" can't apply to signing anyone next year (or any year). The $51.11 is a one-time, tax-free, non-payroll posting fee.)

I, for one, welcome our new Matsuzak-it-to-me overlords! Not bonsai, BANZAI!

[Kluv]

Cripes! LC beat me to it (that's what I get for not hitting that "post your comment" button right away.

Squish like grape!

[mary j]

Hey lou -

Take a moment to read some of the stuff this morning. The market is far from huge. This isn't Yao and CHina. Teams have already mined Japan and almost all revenue is split equally. Zimblast said there's 3 million a year to be made. Even if you call that conservative and bump that up to 5 million, that will take (here I'll do the math for you) 10 years to make that money back. This wasn't a business decision. It was baseball - pure and simple.

[h.b.]

The news is reporting that 5 small tsunamis having hit Japan after a 8.1 mag quake.

That's how a big a fucking deal this is. The earth moves!

[Natalie]

Gosh, and here I thought fans usually griped about the business decisions and not the baseball decisions??? Damned if you do, etc., I guess.

[h.b.]

MJ,

I thought you were going away and/or going to stop the saying the same thing over and over?

Consider this your warning. Persist in creating more noise than signal here in the comments at your own peril.

[Bob]

But MJ, as pointed out several times here, the %51.11M doesn't count against ANYTHING. It's not going to prevent the Sox from signing anyone else at almost any price. It's sort of John Henry pocket money. It's real money to be sure, but the Sox (and definitely the Skankees) would spend a billion a year if it weren't for luxury taxes, et al. The $51.11M doesn't count against that at all.

The Sox spend more than that every year on Fenway upgrades, Dominican facilities, maintaining minor league facilities, etc. Nobody ever says, "Oh, don't improve Fenway...then we won't be able to sign a top-line outfielder."

This $51.11M is the same sort of "invisible" investment.

[buckner was framed]

and at the risk of prolonging this, I think the real wildcard here, as was pointed out yesterday, is the Sox' ownership stake in NESN. MJ, reread your own quote from the first post: "...to equally distribute the vast majority of their earnings related to the merchandising of Matsuzaka..." Merchandise, yes. NESN is not merchandise- It's money in the bank

[mary j]

Fine - think of what 38 million (+ the 40-50 he'll get in salary) could have bought...

[Bob]

Hmm, maybe the best available pitcher on the market?

Oh, wait. That would be Matsuzaki.

[mary j]

Right buck, except that doesn't include the games. So yeah, the pre-games and post-games must be worth what? If the entire MLB contract is 46 million/year? You tell me...

[Bob]

Oh GOD! STOP! I can't take it anymore...

H.B...please: I vote for death by lethal ejection.

[mary j]

Pavano was once the best FA pitcher available.

[h.b.]

If only Mary J and BigBri could find an issue to take opposite sides on. Then they could both go on and on saying the same thing over and over with neither listening to the other's point.

It'd be like matter vs. anti-matter. You could probably power a city the size of Fitchburg on the energy of it all.

[Bob]

This topic is like rubbing your boy/girl-friend's arm over and over and over in the same place with the same motion.

It's a nuisance, not a turn on.

[louclinton]

//The market is far from huge. This isn't Yao and CHina. Teams have already mined Japan and almost all revenue is split equally.//

Here’s a comparison of the per capita incomes of the two:

Rank

87 People's Republic of China 7,198 (just above Algeria)

16 Japan 30,615

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_by_GDP_(PPP)_per_capita

And, not to be too big of a smart ass, but I have been to Japan many times, China less so… the concentration of people in Japan supports a quick play for market share.

mj, you seem earnest enough, but you render me weary. I’m sure the velvet rope crowd at SOSH will eat this shit up.

Respectfully,

lc

ps: if someone could email me a link which would explain how I can place a live link in my comments it would be much appreciated

[louclinton]

In fairness, I should point out that if I ever got an invite to be one of the velvet rope crowd, I would turn on a dime.

hypocritically (you can't spell it without 2 l's and 2 c's),

lc

[mary j]

Who exactly am I not listening to? The fans that are excited by this move? A part of me is excited - the same part that was exicted by Beckett. But everyone else is wrong. It wasn't a business deicion. Even if great, it won't be worth it. They've changed the whole nature of how they do business. They're becoming what you despise most - the MFY! Now I know what Busgh's cabinet meeting must feel like - everyone too busy with the circle jerk to think or talk rationally. Hey, if it feels good... Woe is me if I feel like the Wonderjock is the perfect symbol for DM - looks great and screams for attention but what's underneath is less than satisfying. Ever wonder why Japanese condoms are the size of quarters?

[Kluv]

Lou -- I just emailed you an explanation.

[Bob]

Better, Mary J., better...

[Bob]

Snort...gurgle...chortle...

[Billy Mahty]

You must be new to the comments here, because, for the most part, the comments tend toward the light and the humorous.

... except for every third day when the comments devolve into the mother of all flame wars.

[jdog71]

I can already see the Fox sports intros for Sox/Yanks games: A tiny Japanese fishing village being smashed to bits by some 5' 4" red and white rubber 'zilla, hurling 'gyroballs' at a similar, pinstriped, behemoth. They'll call doubleheaders 'Creature Double Features'. Oh the joy.

[Dave S.]

Doodoododo, dodo, dodo youcanttouchthis!
Doodoododo, dodo, dodo breakitdown!

So anyway, will the first D-Mothra vs. Godzilla matchup fetch the largest worldwide ratings for a baseball game in history?

[h.b.]

And just how bad do you think McCarver will mangle the word "gyroball"?