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Ready to rumble (or slap balls, depending)

What a difference a weekend makes.



Yankees' lead cut to one. This is what you call a pennant race.


Yeah, but wait a second. Everyone's favorite Yankees, Alex Rodriguez, "feels as if he 'just finished spring training' and is ready to tackle the season."


20 errors, 105 strikeouts, and 17 groundball double plays latah, A-Rod is now ready to bring it.


Scary. Scary. Heh.



Weekend Haiku

The Fat Man Brings It.
Wily Mo Hammers The Ball.
Birds Suck. Sox Get Well.


Sure Slappy,We're shakin' lol

A-Rod brings in the selfless "I played through injury the whole season for the team" card? Doesn't he understand this is why New York fan hate him? He sounds like the loser kid in high school who couldn't walk the walk and made up rediculous lies instead of admitting the truth. I'm *highly* amused.

Took my dad to the Fens on Saturday for his 69th birthday. Monster seats (by lottery) Section 8...Holy Crap; those seats are wicked awesome! My only fear is that experience will be a bit like finally flying 1st class; you never want to go back to coach.

Great weather (the past few days are why we New Englanders put up with freezing slush in March, etc.), great game, great time with my dad...and a freakin' missle launched by Wily Mo when straight over our heads. I swear I heard that thing whistle as it went by.

From the Monsta seats, we couldn't see what was going on when Manny threw to Gonza who threw to Lowell to nail Fahey at 3rd (I thought Manny had fallen and couldn't get up).

And to top it off, a walk-off win by Manny (my dad's favorite player). A perfect ending to my dad's birthday. I don't know about all of you, but I came away from this weekend feeling an important momentum change with the Sox...we'll see.

What a bag of tools. A-Rod knows that hitters traditionally suck it up right after spring training right? Pitchers are fresh, batters are groggy, and the weather is cool.

Dateline, Punks-A-RodNY. We now go live to the mayor.

Mayor: Thank you, thank you. Let's just see what the little guy has to say to us. (reaches into a tree stump shaped like a limo)

A-Rod: chitter, chitter, chitter

Mayor: (stuffs A-Rod back into the hole) I have spoken with our favorite Ground-intoDP-hog. It is hereby declared that there will be four more weeks of suck, errors, and crying from our little friend. Sorry, folks, thanks for coming out today!

Bill Murray: Thank God! I'm a Cubs fan!

Nothing to pull you out of the midst of near-coma like depression than a sweep. I'm still worried about the results of the road trip, but then again, I don't think I ever stop worrying with this damn team.
Can't wait to see PayRod "lower the shoulder"....and have him recoil off Wily Mo like a bouncy ball.

There's that Soxfan swagger we all know and love! The tone of A-Rod bashing is directly related to the Red Sox stock ticker: shrill and bitter on the down, languid and full on the up.

It's setting up to be quite a series this coming weekend. I'm looking forward to seeing what's what when the smoke clears and the hangovers fade next Tuesday.

you are making this out to be better than it was, i gaurntee we will go 1- against the tigers, it was the ORIEOLS,

We should EXPECT to sweep them, it would be worse if we didn't, don't get your hopes up

The reigning MVP, Last 7 games:

10/22, 3HR, 5RBIs, .455/.538/.955

Enjoy the Tigers and see you in a few short days for several resounding "slaps" off of that large, wall in RF....

"Hoc tempore obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit"
(In these days friends are won through flattery, the truth gives birth to hate)

oops, LF

Yeah, Jason. THat was a KEY blast yesterday in the late innings with no one on and the game pretty much already out of reach. Nice bookend to the booted ball and excuse about playing hurt all year. What a hero...

We all know A-Rod gets "slapped" around here (what did you expect, it's a Red Sox site after all...) but hell, even your own papers (and from the sounds of it, most of the fans) are on to Alex's whiny little game. I agree with the poster above who compared him to the high school kid. We all knew 1-2 (or more) kids just like that. Really good analogy.

Sure glad Yankee fans are never shrill or bitter.

Just loud and obnoxious...Ba-doom :)

Where in my post did I ever suggest that Yankee fans are neither shrill nor bitter? I was talking about Red Sox fans. I find many Yankee fans to be at various times shrill, bitter, loud and obnoxious, just as I do many of their Red Sox counterparts.

I was more suggesting that the nature of his A-Rod bashing is a fine barometer for how a Red Sox fan feels about his team's season at the time.

TGTOS- Thank God the O's Suck....

J.O...context, please.

2 of the 3 HR were late in games lost by more than 2 runs (after the HR is added in). The other one was a lead changer...in the 3rd inning.

3 of the RBIs were from himself...because of the HR. One was meaningful (sorta...again, 3rd inning lead change) and the other was piling on after the game was already out of reach.

He has been hitting the ball again (of course, ANYTHING more than 1 for 16 from the previous 7 days is probably a godsend these days, eh?). He just hasn't been hitting it in late-and-close or RISP situations (14 LOB over the past 6 games, including 5 LOB in the 3rd game against the White Sox that was a 5-4 loss for NY).

I will give him this though...he is a league leader! In all of the majors, he's 7th in GiDPs, 15th in Ks, 5th in errors (his fielding percentage of 0.932 is worst of AL 3B with at least 50 games).

By the way, Dave, this would all be true whether the Sox were 80-30 or 30-80 right now, so don't think I'm hating on A-Rod because I'm up on the Sox. I'm always at a steady 250 millibars when it comes to Alex regardless of what's going on with the Sox.

Dave S. - My reading of Harwich's post was that it was a response to J.O., not you. You seem a most level-headed MLB fan and I generally enjoy your observations which I find to be measured and even occassionaly insightful. I do not question your character, though I do look askance at your choice of teams to root for.

Ce la vie - that's what makes the world go 'round, ne ce pas?

Now, back to Mel Brooks:

"It's alive... IT'S ALIVE!!!!"

Way to hustle, Manny.

And for good measure, one of my favorites from the most UN-pc movie of all time:

"Alright, we'll take the n----rs and the ch-nks, but we won't take the Irish!" -- Howard Johnson

How about some equanimity? Sweeping los birdos while giving up 18 runs is hardly encouraging. A more accurate measure of the team is the series against the Tigers. They are in panic mode after being swept by the White Sox. 5-2 against the Tigers and MFYs before the final West coast swing would be nice but it is probably a stretch. Anyone else placing an order for Remy-Orsillo bobble-heads?


Please, baby!! I am not from Havana!!

"God dammit Rob in CT, you use your tongue prettier than a twenty dollar whore."

On a non-Mel Brooks note: how exactly does one go about seeing the Sox-Yanks this weekend despite being a bridesmaid in a wedding Saturday evening (flight and rehearsal dinner on Fri, flight on Sun)? Anyone have any sneaky man tricks for catching games during events at which you'd rather not be? :)


'sneaky man tricks' is a double redundancy. 'tricks' alone would have sufficed - we would infer the rest.

Just a note: That "Bob" who posted earlier predicting gloom and doom is not me.

Uh, "Bob"? Could you choose another moniker as that's sorta mine on this blog?

How about "Bob Lobel"?

I am old enough to remember the "old school" methond of having the AM radio in the pocket with the "in-the-ear-piece" plug. My grandfather was a great one for that. I used to work with a guy would get text message hits every time an inning ended at a Red Sox game. I think you can get that through MLB.

I am old enough to remember the "old school" method of having the AM radio in the pocket with the "in-the-ear-piece" plug. My grandfather was a great one for that. I used to work with a guy would get text message hits every time an inning ended at a Red Sox game. I think you can get that through MLB.

Ooops! ARod-ed it! Double post.

Thank Jeebus for Baltimore and interleague: 27-3 vs. the O's and senior circuit, 41-45 vs. everybody else.

Unfortunately, there are no more interleague games and only six more opportunities to beat up Baltimore. This would be an excellent time to start beating some good teams.

Yazbread, you are right on the redundancy, but I come from the school of thought of "why use 5 words when you could use 10?" It's the English major in me.

FoT- I like the idea of the text messages. Would that my $450 dress had built in pockets for my cell. Damn, THAT's what I should have paid the tailor to do rather than hemming the frickin' thing!

Natalie, isn't that what those garter belts are for? Or does just the bride get those? Perhaps your escort could be so kind as to hold your cell? However, there could be an exchange of goods/services involved for that favor...I just say.

Natalie -
Ooooh! A Wed [Sox] Wose. How Womantic!

Lili Von Shtupp - What's your name, Cowboy?
J.O. - "Tex, Ma'am."
Lili Von Shtupp - "Tex, mem, eh? Are you in show business?"
J.O. - "No, Ma'am."
Lili Von Shtupp - "Then get your fucking feet off the [website] stage!"

FoTito - "Is that a 10 gallon hat, or are you just enjoying the show?"

Rob in CT - "Mongo [Rob in CT] only pawn... in game of life."

FoT- no garters, but the dress is strapless, so in the cleavage might work best. :) And hey, set to vibrate might be fun! Alas, no dates for anyone in the (bride's side) wedding party. We are all college roommates and everyone is leaving their boyfriends, husbands, babies at home and doing it up as a "girls' weekend." Don't ask. Was NOT my call. All that means to me is that there will be no awesome post-wedding nookie and instead be a whole bunch o' chicks dancing drunk to the random requested college hits of '93-'97.

I am really really bummed about missing this weekend series. That I am so bummed makes me worry for about my sense of "life perspective."

Kaz...it isn't the tooling on A-Rod in itself, it's rather the quality and type of the insults. For example, your long and creative comparison of A-Rod to a groundhog suggests to me that you currently enjoy a more sanguine view of the Red Sox season. Your insult is layered in that it considers Spring Training as a reference point, has some nice non-sequitor whimsy, and in general lazily swings at the pinata of a season that A-Rod is having this year. It's a fun read. I'm simply comparing this to the more acrid hate towards A-Rod that seems to accompany anti-MFY tirades during times of greater duress. 80-30, 30-80, A-Rod gets his all the same, no doubt. There's just a little more buoyancy to those insults when the Sox, say, sweep instead of being swept.


The best you can hope for is that the bride gets cold feet before Friday. Maybe you could give her a call and tell her you think the guy is a bum. If you are looking for some words of wisdom regarding your lack of perspective - series against MFYs more important than a college friend's wedding - you know that this is not the place for a balanced view of life. Soxaholix makes Ben Wrightman look normal. As to the music of that period, perhaps you can contribute a drunken chorus to 'Where Have All The Cowboys [Up] gone?'.

Dave S -

People will but it a lot of ways, but I think this is the driving point behind all the criticism. ARod is a complete waste of money and an embarassment to New York. That is why Yankees fans boo him, and his performance is incidental to the size of his contract. He's like a whore in a men's prison, sure there's a fat, loose hole but plugging it takes a massive amount of effort.

Regardless of the Red Sox performance or bragging right, ARod will always be a talentless gimp who chokes in the playoffs. Just like Ortiz will always be the guy who hit 2 walk off home runs in the same day to beat you losers in 2004, no one will ever forget.


My personal A-Rod bashing as it manifests itself in the characters is almost always tied to A-Rod saying something I find especially lame (e.g, "I'd slap the ball again." "Next time I'll use my dropping the shoulder move. "I wake up at 5am to work out, while other guys are taking their kids to school." So on and so forth.)

I generally pass on A-Rod when he just commits an error or strikes out with the bases loaded and the game on the line etc.

It's when he opens his mouth that he draws my attention.

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