If we could talk to the animals

Doug:
So this beating the O's 12 consecutive times now is sweet revenge for 2004 when the Sox went 9 and 10 against Baltimore.

 

---

Mike:
Yeah, because, you know, 2004 was so disastrous and all. Heh.

 

---

Doug:
OK so the Sox are humming along nicely just now at 9 games over 500, but the gloomy side of my persona can't help but worry about Schilling. I mean giving up 3 dingahs to the Orioles? C'mon, that was one fugly "win."

 

---

Mike:
No worries. Schilling says he's just overthrowing the ball in 2 strike situations. He'll figure it out. Besides it gives us a chance to revel in the glory of having a "shut-down" bullpen, no runs, no hits and one walk over 3 1/3 innings.

 

---

Doug:
Yeah, no kidding. Paplebon 14 saves with less than 2 full months into the season and battars just .151 against him.

 

---

Mike:
I mean talk about your fucking Alluha Akbar. May peace be upon Papelbon.

 

---

Doug:
Alright. So we now know for certain that a monkey is no match for a bear. But how about the bear versus the nut-ripping chimp?

 

---

Mike:
Whoa, dude, slow down here. See if I'm the nut-rippah's fight managah, there's no way I'm letting the bear into the ring with my man, er, chimp. It'd be insulting to the chimp.

 

---

Doug:
Really, how so?

 

---

Mike:
The bear's got no friggin' street cred. I mean what's Smokey done, eat a little zoo monkey? Pfawh, even A-Rod could take the pathetic zoo monkey.

 

---

Mike:
Think about it. The chimps have been taking it all the way to the fucking man.

 

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Doug:
OK, Don King, so what's it gonna be? Chimp versus …?

 

---

Mike:
C'mon isn't it obvious? Who else has all a sudden gone loco on da Man? Yeah, that's it, the killah gatars.

 

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Doug:
Killah chimp vs killah gatah. No holds barred.

 

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Mike:
And they're both named Ditka.

 

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Doug:
Fucking-A awesome.

 

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