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All about winning

The Red Sox continue to get it done, winners of 6 of their last 7 …

Mike:
Geez, Tim Wakefield is on a roll this year … 4-1, 3.42 ERA …

 

Bill:
No shit. And last night he claimed he didn't have his best knuckleball. But like Trot Nixon said, "If that's not his good stuff, then what is?"

 

Mike:
Meanwhile, are the Spankees digging themselves out of their early season grave -- 3 wins in a row.

 


Mike:
Fuck yeah. They were pythagorean 89-90 win team last year, but managed to catch every break imaginable until Octobah, and this yeah's Yankees aren't as good as last's.

 

Bill:
85 wins. No playoffs. That's my gut on the Mystique and Aura, er, I mean McStink and Horror show from the Bronx.

 

Mike:
Maybe "Jeets" will convince his email buddy Rojah to come ovah to the Spanks midseason.

 

Bill:
Abso-fucking-lutely because, you know, the Yankees, according to Rojah, are "all about winning" and shit.

 

Mike:
Fuck yeah they are … except of course when they got bitch slapped by Arizona in 2001, punked by the Angels in 2002, bent ovah and made to squeal like a pig by the Marlins in 2003, and then given four straight golden showahs by, ah, who was that again in 2004? [Laughs]

 

Bill:
Clemens is too busy counting his money to notice that Torre's Spank and Yank are 0 for this century.

 

Comments

It was the Angels in 2002, guys. But great stuff!

Yes, right. Angels in 2002. Don't know where I got Twins from. Thanks. Made the change to the dialog.

Oh I love seeing 0-fer-century. Brings a tear to my eye.
Apparently Kevin Brown's DIPS ERA is around 3.5, which is kind of funny when you think about it. So, essentially the Yankees' offense is so unbelievably horrible it is doubling what his ERA would be if he had a league-average team behind him. Getting a sinkerball pitcher with slappy, Captain Intangibles, some AA kid at 2nd and Giambi at first is about the worst situation imaginable. I love it.

H.B - I've told you I really like this blog. Very funny and usually right on the mark. You fucked up today, however. The reason the world is growing to hate the SAWX and SAWX nation is because you guys say things like, 'the Yanks were bitch slapped by Arizona' or they were 'bent ovah by the Marlins'. You guys should be smarter than this, but somehow you are not. Mariano makes a bad throw to second. If that doesn't happen, we are not talking about the Diamondbacks. EVAH. That is hardly a bitch-slapping. Wells punks out in game 5. If that fat bastard doesn't spit the bit, the Yanks win in 7 and we are not talking about the marlins. EVAH.

But let's say you DO want to twist these facts and portray them with some bizarro New-England-Farmer's-Almanac-logic. Crowing about your rival losing in the playoffs, when they didn't lose to YOU is just stupid. Where were you guys when the Yankees lost those games? Touching yourselves while looking at your Carlton Fisk rookies cards, that's where you were!

Ooops. Wait a minute. I remember now. These guys are only characters and not real people. Carry on...


Yes, just characters talking and, more importantly, the "bitch slapped" and "bent over" are both friggin' metaphors!

When someone says, "Look the yard is blanketed with snow!" do you then say, "That's not really a blanket because if you tried to sleep under it, you would be very cold"?

Also, this site is NOT meant to be ESPN or Retrosheet or anything else that you'd look to for absolute veracity. It's a couple of guys (or girls) just trying to crack each other up in the morning at the start of a work day.

Facts are twisted. Memory is selective. Words are chosen as much for humor as anything else.

More important, it makes for far better reading, at least for Red Sox fans, to read about the Yankees being bitch slapped then to read "the Yankees sure did almost win in 2001... yeah, they gave it all they had."

I think BigBri should calm down and drink an egggareaam (best phonetic spelling I can muster). As far as the rest of the world hating Sox fans: what the fuck? There was one shitty article supposing that and...what else? I know several people from the 'tri-state' area who have all of a sudden started wearing Sox gear about town. One is from Connecticut, so he has an excuse. One is from New Jersey, so he can pretend he is a Mets fan celebrating the defeat of the Spankees. But one is from upper state and the other from Manhattan, and both of them used to wear Chokees hats. Am I the only one who could possibly be encountering this flipping? If anything, Faux Sox nation is growing as the Stinkees crowd disperses.

Yep ... gave it all they had. And it wasn't enough.

well, some people shouldnt bitch.... all the Sox fans attending games in other stadiums (Tampa, Toronto) means that Sox fans are contributing VAST revenue and paying for those teams to be more competitive....

"Mariano makes a bad throw to second. If that doesn't happen, we are not talking about the Diamondbacks. EVAH. That is hardly a bitch-slapping."

Once again LilBri has NO clue what he's talking about. His beloved Chokees were outscored by the DBacks in the 2001 World Series 37 to 14 and out-hit .264 to .183 and outslugged .394 to .288. The Spankees were damned lucky to even make it to a 7th game in that Series...if Brenly hadn't fucked up in game 4 by leaving in Kim too long, and if Tino and Brosius hadn't gotten a couple fat pitches to hit, that series only goes 5 or 6 games. Arizona definitely kicked their asses.

And, of course, they didn't even belong in the 2003 Series...that was the year their postseason MVP was Grady Little. So it's really no surprised that they CHOKED to the Marlins...that's who they are, that's what they do. They choke. The New York Chokees.

Go back to your crappy little blog about your unhealthly obsession with hating the fans of the team that kicked your Chokees' asses last fall, LilBri.


Oh PU-LEASE....

"Crowing about your rival losing in the playoffs, when they didn't lose to YOU is just stupid."

Geez, then who are all those people in Yankee stadium wearing those "Babe Bucky BUCKNER" shirts? Why were those surly teens behind me at Yankee Stadium last year growling about Bill Buckner in my ear all game? Are they not aware Buckner was a Met?

Trust me on this one, plenty of Yankee fans crow plenty about Sawx loses. Can you only imagine what you would all be saying about the Cards if we had lost to them in the WS?

Funny how BigBri disappears with every Yankees loss and only re-emerges when they can eke out a win. Yet another reason to hope the spanks go 0-for-the-rest-of-the-season.

p.s. what up daKine, mad hacker says hi

h.b.:

(and the rest of you)

If I may offer some unsolicited advice,

DON'T FEED THE TROLLS!

Well, LilBri, if we MUST dwell in the present, how about "D-Rays Bitch-Slap Spankees"?

It doesn't matter when the first century began, there's no rule that says you have to count from year 1. No one says 1990 was part of the 80s, it's part of the 90s. 2000 is part of the 21st century to people who don't have a stick up their ass.

As much as I would like to imagine the Yankees are 0-for-this-century, I just can't.

RonF:
I hear ya' and generally try to follow your advice, but this isn't quite like a message board (say, SoSH) where a troll can disrupt a substantive discussion. We're all just basically shooting the shit to the tune of one or two dozen comments per strip and basically riffing on whatever the characters say that day, so refuting some of the Spankee Invader's inevitably lame points doesn't really seem disruptive. Of course, this is h.b.'s house, and I would always respect his intentions and wishes regarding how the comments and discussion should flow in here.

h.b - Good point with respect to better reading for Red Sox fans. I guess I can understand why you guys would want to look at things in that way.

The rest of you - Keep flappin' your yappers. The Yankees will fools of all of you this year.How awful will you feel when this 'ancient' team that is 'rotting from the inside out' kicks your asses yet again?

How awful will you feel when this 'ancient' team that is 'rotting from the inside out' kicks your asses yet again?

This is like the neighborhood bully who
finally gets punched in the nose, lucky
punch maybe... but afterwards it's just
never the same ;)

This is f-ing hilarious (from the NY Times online advertising column):

A Reader Asks: There is a commercial for Speed Stick deodorant starring Alex Rodriguez. He's talking about how tough a town New York can be. But at the end, there is something that I noticed that I don't think was really part of the message.

The product is shown in front of a backdrop of a baseball stadium at night. You can clearly see the light fixtures. Some bulbs are missing but the lights are on. In the main fixture, it appears that the bulbs that are on are in the configuration of the characters "E5." Was this on purpose?

Stuart Elliott: "E5" means error on the third baseman, and since Mr. Rodriguez is the third baseman for the New York Yankees, it seems highly unlikely for the bulbs to spell that out. But that is indeed what viewers see in the commercial.

However, "it was entirely unintentional," says Allison Klimerman, a spokeswoman for the Colgate-Palmolive Company in New York; the Mennen division of Colgate-Palmolive makes Speed Stick. "It ran that way for many months and no one noticed," she adds.

Until now, that is.

"E5" is error on SS, no?

The first time I saw the E5 in the lights on that commercial I nearly pissed in my own pants.

I like to think that one of the so-called creatives working on that campaign was a Red Sox fan and that it was an intentional thing.

I certainly wouldn't take the company spokesperson's word on that not being intentional. He/she really wouldn't have any idea and if any of the ad folks were asked, they'd deny it.

SawxSince67; "E5" is an error on the third baseman. The infield order goes: 1. Pitcher 2. Catcher 3. 1st Baseman, 4. 2nd Baseman 5. 3rd Baseman 6. Short.

SAWXSince67 - // "E5" is error on SS, no? // I'm going to let you slide on this one, but you owe me one.

"The infield order goes: 1. Pitcher 2. Catcher 3. 1st Baseman, 4. 2nd Baseman 5. 3rd Baseman 6. Short."

I'll tell ya, I just didn't have this memorized...I was thinking "counter-clockwise"...

Thanks for the info.

Yankee Cartman--I owe you nothing as I've more times than not ignored your (previously) socially aberrant rants--seems the ritalin has kicked in as of late...

SawxSince67, dead on about the medication kicking in, but wrong medication. It's Haldol that's kicked in because anyone who thinks that 'mystique', er 'McStink' is gonna evha work again.....is actively hallucinating. As DaveL pointed out, it's just not the same anymore. Now it's just so much...noise..or in terms that those Stinkee fans might understand, "Yadda yadda yadda"..

I can't wait for the Jeter Speed Stick ad. If they do "E-6", I will call the man who made those ads and treat him to dinner for two at his favorite restaurant, money is no object.

Wake's ERA is 3.18 (just want him to look as good as possible). I think the 3.42 is what Clement, Wake, and Arroyo have gone so far this year (as of yesterday).

Wake's renaissance has begun. He's gonna party like it's 2002 (with some 1995 highlights thrown in there as well).

PigSty, you gotta get outta your tiny spankee world. People outside of NY dont hate the Sox, people hate the spankees. Maybe its the paint cans in the corner of your stinky basement makin' you hear voices. So many people told me they were pulling for the sox last WS if for no other reason than they HATED mfy. And Im in Calif.
Why dont you make like Trot and go spend some time w/your "family" instead of posting all day.

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