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O'er the land of the free

The Red Sox win the series in Texas, and The Soxaholix introduce a new character, Steve Xiang …

Steve:
Did you see that stats chart in the latest Gammons? Teams with a May 1st winning percentage in the .500 to .549 range only go on to make the playoffs 1 in 4 times.

 

Bill:
Yeah, Steve, and prior to last October the chahts woulda shown that no teams down 0 and 3 in a playoff series evah came back and won 4 straight … so forgive me if I take a whizz all ovah your chaht.

 

Steve:
[Laughs] OK, OK … But what about Renteria? His offense and defense have gone total Jennifer Wilbanks on us.

 

Bill:
Yeah, like the "missing" bride, Edgah's seems to be stressing a bit … though everyone seems to think that in time he'll be all ovah the ball like Paula Abdul on Corey Clark.

 

Steve:
Reminds me, I'm so fucking glad my Asian immigrant parents worked shit jobs 80 hours a week their whole lives so I could live the American Dream and wrestle with important issues of the day like "Why happened to Jennifer?" and "Is Paula a jailbaiting ho?"

 

Bill:
Hell yeah you are! And wait til you see the joy in your pop's eye when you tell him you get to watch the Mary Kay Letourneau wedding on Entertainment Tonight.

 

Steve:
Who the fuck knew this is what founding father Jefferson had in mind by a "pursuit of happiness"?

 

Comments

Is Steve Xiang supposed to be invisible, or is something not loading correctly?

If you're not seeing the image, it's most likely a browser cache of the previous CSS.

Try a "force" refresh in your browser. (On a Mac you hold down the alt key and hit your browsers refresh button. Not sure for a PC.)

Or try clearing your browser cache.

F5 for those who are still bound with Windows.

Ni hao, Steve (assuming Mandarin)--still can't see him, in any case.

American culture, as it is indicated by TV, radio, etc is embarassing.

(My own hypocrisy:)Well, except for South Park or Family Guy--which is just plain funny.

That "Missing Bride" story set me off on a rant yesterday--her pure selfishness is astonishing.

Though, my rant after Foulke's "not in enough, not high enough" pitch to Texeira lasted longer.

It's a bummer people are having trouble seeing the new graphic, because it features Steve outside on the streets of Boston. You may recognize the spot.

Here's another possibility for those who can't see the image. Follow the link below to try and force a CSS update into your browser.

http://www.soxaholix.com/tp/style/cells.css

Ah yes, got it now...corner of Burlington and Brookline?

...mmmmm....


I sure recognize the spot... that is my cut-down street to get to PJ Kilroys before games. :)

The new graphic is off the meathook. As far as American culture going to shit, I think it has been this way for years and years, but the media now concentrates as hahd as possible on the stories that make us want to punch the subjects in their crotches.

I confess to enjoying the hell out of the runaway bride story. That scene of her in the airport covering her face with a towel is an instant classic.

And this Paula Abdul thing is getting really juicy. Supposedly they have her on tape making a booty call.

Corey Clark had been arrested for like beating up his sis.....Why do chicks alwaysgo for the bad boys?

Although she is no Jennifer Garner, even back in the day, I would let Paula rock my mic.

You always make me laugh.

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