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Smite (Obey Your Thirst)


Bill:
Beautiful. That quote should be carved in stone above libraries and city halls and shit as a testament to all that is good and glorious.

 

Doug:
Absolutely. Let's recall Wakefield's Red Sox haaht and old school values the next time the quacks in sports media punditry begin the "today's ballplayahs are eeevil" hue and cry.

 

 

Doug:
Yeah, can you believe he went on record saying that when the visiting team is batting fans should reach in and interfere with the play and shit just don't do it when the Sox are up.

 

Bill:
Too bad Schilling isn't Catholic, he'd make a perfect going-medieval-on-your-ass Papa.

 

Doug:
Fuck yeah he would. Can you imagine?

 

Bill:
Yeah, yeah, he'd be all, that "Thou Shall Not Kill" bit doesn't apply to the other wrong god fucks like those prick Huguenots. 

 

Doug:
Yeah, Pope Montague de Sangre Sockus the First would be all issuing encyclicals to command the faithful to get their raggedy one true church asses out there and start killing heathens and infidels and what not.

 

Bill:
Summon your inquisitors and lay a mofo smite down. That's what I'm encyclicalanating about fercrissakes.

 

Comments

"Encyclicalanating."

Now THAT is a word. Nice work.

As much as i love this site todays one of those strips that you just cant follow unless your really old i guess. I was lost at "perfect going-medieval-on-your-ass Papa."

"those prick Huguenots"

Wow.

Wake moved into a house down the street from my folks. Guess they'll be seeing more of him around town.

I'm not sure one has to be "really old" to follow today's strip, since the "medieval on your ass" line is actually a riff from Pulp Fiction. Granted, that movie is from what, '93?, but still it seems fairly recent.

Also, my historical allusion to the days when the Pope and the Catholic Church commanded large armies has been on my mind since I've been bombarded recently with trailers and commercials for this new Ridley Scott movie "Kingdom of Heaven" about the Crusades.

With that said, though, I will confess that it'd be easier to "get" today's references if you are familiar with the often violent history of the Catholic Church.

Gotta mix it up with all kinds of stuff. One day it's "cuddle parties" the next it's the Huguenots.

Keeping you on your toes and shit. :)

I think that the cruelty of the Calvinist Protestants during the Reformation Era would more aptly apply to the current Schillingology.... but thats just me.

Great point about Calvinist Protestants, but that has come up before on the strip, of course.
http://www.soxaholix.com/tp/2004/11/hearkening_to_t.html

And also I always try my best to keep the strip reflective of real time current events. (You may have heard that the Pope JP2 died and a new one was selected recently. I think they had one or two small news stories on it.:) Hence today's theme.

Man, I'm snarky today, eh? See what a four day weekend does to me?

What would Shitbreinner would do to the MFY if they keep shitting themselves like they have been doing since last year? Would he commmand a decree to cut their huevos if they don't respond to his all-commanding press releases? Would he go to the Vatican and make the Pope say something about it? I read somewhere that the current Pope is kinda conservative and you know Shitbreinner is the king of traditions and what not.

Schilling tells fans to interfere with the ball when the opposition hits it. What a class act. No wonder he is hated in his own clubhouse. The man is an ass-clown.

Moncho- Steinbrenner will do what he always does when the Yanks are under-performing. He will yell and scream and piss and moan. And Joe Torre, America's Manager, will absorb the heat, like he always has, and get his team to focus on winning.

My prayers for the SAWX to have a red-hot April have been answered. It will make your ultimate demise even more sweet. He, he, he.

Hey, BigBri -- remember when all of New York was treating me like a hero for interfering with a ball during that playoff game against the Orioles? Remember that? Huh? Huh?

-Little Jeffey

Yankee Cartman is actually comedy relief at this point.

Don't look now but one of your proteges is http://www.sexandsox.blogspot.com/> calling it quits . I was a bit skeptical considering the pink motif, but I did enjoy her porn.
Not having read anything about the Sox since February however, does that qualify one as a http://www.soxaholix.com/tp/2004/12/girlfriend_in_a.html> Casual Fan bitch? .

personally, i just think its sad that he considers 8-6 a "red-hot April."

Schilling tells fans to interfere with the ball when the opposition hits it. What a class act. No wonder he is hated in his own clubhouse. The man is an ass-clown.

When he's not shutting up 55 thousand Yankee
fans, this ASS-CLOWN and his hot wife bust
their asses for charity.

Joe Torre? America's Manager? Shit boy, you just made me laugh. "America's Manager" will get his only closer a blown arm this year or maybe the next. "America's Manager" managed to drive away his winningest pitcher (Pettite) to a waste land (Houston) just not to be in the Zoo anymore. "America's Manager" seems that he just can't manage a $200 million payroll to success. Face it bitch, "America's Manager" had the tools to be a good manager. Now he's just a grumpy old man that doesn't care anymore, except his own paycheck. "America's Manager"...great punch line.

h.b. doesn't just come back from his Pats' Day hangover...he comes back with a vengance!

I presume that the Yank-Me Troll, Keeper (from his parents' basement) of the Crappy Blog That Demonstrates His Unhealthy Obsession with the Sox and Sox Fans, is simply lashing out here to ease the pain of realizing that The Big Eunuch , far from being the savior he was desparately praying for, can’t even beat the Devil Dogs at home in the Toilet. Welcome to the AL, Mullethead; you don’t get to coast and pad your stats by striking out pitchers in this league.

I'm so happy about Wake being extended that I've been smiling like a hooker for the past 24 hours. Good use of Hugonauts, hb. I've been obsessed with religion of old since reading Neal Stephenson's Baroque Cycle (3000 pages plus).

Completely off topic, mad love to D Lowe who is doing well and seems content in LA. I made fun of him every day last season (on this site, quite frequently) and now I'd like to ask his forgiveness. When I called him "D. Blow" it was because he was, er, going to blow the opposition away.

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