A fascination fetish

Susan/Circle:
If you needed more proof why entertainment and lifestyle reporters should nevah ruminate on sports, some dink in Baltimore writes in a TV review, "if even the Red Sox can win it all, why not the O's in 2005?"

 

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Mike:
Guess the dude's so busy watching Joan of Arcadia that he nevah noticed the O's suck. Er, except when they play Boston, of course. I'm still pissed, even after the World Series win, that the difference between the Spankees final season record and the Sox's came down to how the two clubs did against Baltimore.

 

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Susan/Circle:
Let it go, dude. If you're feeling down, just whip out your official Red Sox Nation ID card and let its prestige and salience wash over you like a golden shower in a border town bordello.

 

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Mike:
How do you say "wicked pissah" in Spanish? [Laughs]

 

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Susan/Circle:
Back to mixing sports, celebrity, and entertainment, I know Beth has already covered the Barbara Walters Most Fascinating Person crapfest, but I just wanted to say that of the 100 or so adjectives that come to mind when I think of Curt Schilling, fascinating is not among them.

 

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Mike:
No shit. Harry Potter is fascinating fercrissakes. Women being attracted to Clay Aiken is bizarrely fascinating, but Curt Bloody Sock Schilling? He's too god-damned brazenly manly for such effeteness as fucking fascinating.

 

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Susan/Circle:
By the way, what exactly did Barbara I Slur My Words Walters find so fascinating about Paris Hilton?

 

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Mike:
You mean besides her congenital water ski feet? Bitch is a size 11!

 

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Susan/Circle:
Fucking-A I forgot that. She's the Skanky Sasquatch. Even "I'm a rhythm machine" slutmaster Tommy Lee got turned off by the Hilton hell hooves.

 

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Comments

[loosah]

Well, as Butters said about her, "I'd like to be your girlfriend, Ms. Hilton, even thought you have a big nose." Only problem is that you then have to always wear a bear suit.

Just when I thought yesterday couldn't be beat...here comes another gem, HB. Keep up the work...funniest Sox blog on the web.

[JB]

hb, I have no idea how you come up with this stuff, but it's fantastic. It borders on fascinating, but I would never insult you with such an adjective.

[Manly size 12's]

Wow. I had no idea about Paris Hilton's feet.
Puts her in the same league with Janet Reno and Peggy Hill.
Seeing the term 'skanky sasquatch' in print is well worth the price of admission.

[da kine]

As a self-appointed guru, I can tell you the O's are some scared little goat-blowers. Speaking of fellators, is there anything that slizzut Paris Hilton won't do? I don't get the fascination. She's friggin' repugnant.

[beth]

Click http://www.snarkywood.com/2004/10/paris_hilton.html>here for more hatin' on Paris.

Thanks for the link, h.b.!

[joey]

Here's your wicked pissed in Spanish, H.B.. .malo cabrear. Their piss is more like "taking the piss out of someone or something."

[Tatiana]

Oh my gosh, my feet are size 10 :(

[Aaron]

On a completely different topic: How 'bout that Boomer signing? Who's the odd man out, Pedro or Pavano? They can't sign all three.

[mike kaufhold]

So Hart...how can I get the complete text (including pictures) of the Soxoholic news articles. The humor is so great...all of us sub-Nation people need more of this! PeskyBoy from PA