The Red Sox open their home stand with a 9-2 win over the Twins …
Bill:
Click the heals of your ruby slippers, boy, cuz there ain't no place like home!.
Doug:
You've got that right Auntie Em.
Bill:
And Nomar's slam? How 'bout them apples?
Doug:
Yessa. This is the wicked lineup of the East we've been looking for.
Bill:
No help down south from the Orioles, though. Bird turds gave up 13 mofo walks to the Spankees and two long balls to A-Fraud. Jeez.
Doug:
Fuck the Orioles. They've become the interlopers of the A-L East.
Bill:
While the Devil Rays, the Devil Rays?!?!?! 12 straight wins? What the fuck?
Doug:
Never thought I'd be jealous of Tampa Bay. It feels weeeahd.
Bill:
Yeah, being jealous of the D-Rays is like finding out that not only is your girlfriend a pre-op transsexual but also that "she" has a bigger dick than you as well. [Laughs]
Doug:
Hey, stop reading my private fucking emails, will ya? [Laughs]
