Resting but restive [updated]

After 19 games in 20 days, the team and fans get a day off from baseball …

Mike:
I've been asking myself: if I'd known in advance how off-the-scale brutal this stretch of schedule would be, what kind of record would I be happy with in the 17 games since they left for Texas?

 

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Doug:
[Pauses to consider] I'd of been happy with 9-8.

 

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Mike:
Absolutely. Going 10-7 would have been cause for celebration.

 

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Doug:
Yeah, 10 and 7 and Alexandra Kerry would be wearing the see through every day. [Laughs]

 

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Mike:
Yeah, we await the Bush twins to respond tit for tat.

 

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Doug:
I like that sleepy, stoney, vague look Jenna has. I would like to ply her with drink and offer her good pills. And then we'd laugh and steal money from environmental groups which we'd spend on expensive designer clothes made in a sweatshop … Finally, we'd make our way to the Haliburton suite to fondle the hanging chad. [Laughs]

 

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Mike:
So if this were an election between the incumbent and presumptive first daughter challenger, you're going with Jenna Bush?

 

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Doug:
Faster than a Florida recount my good man. The Kerry chick, despite her impressive credentials, doesn't inspire me to wantonness.

 

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Mike:
Speaking of the wanton, the Sox are on pace to commit 149 errors this season?

 

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Doug:
Yeah, well, "mistakes were made," as they say. And when's the last time a World Series was decided on an error? [Laughs]

 

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Author's Notes
Mike's first speech is pulled from a post by SoSH member "Eric Van" in the thread The Brutal Travel Schedule Will Even Out and Then Some.