« We're in first place! | Main | The Vengabus is Coming! »

A veritable quandary, homeboy.

The Red Sox lose 6-7 to the Indians, 5 losses in a row …

Bill:
Ah, is it OK to panic now or will the holier than thous make fun of us?

 

Doug:
What us panic? Get the fuck out. This is part of a grand scheme.

 

Bill:
Yeah, Theo Epstein is playing chess while we play checkers.

 

Doug:
Yes, these losses are good doncha know? It's more efficient to group them together like this. It's about process and not outcome.

 

Bill:
It's like they used to say in Vietnam: "We had to destroy the village in order to save the village" The Red Sox, likewise, have to lose games in order to win the division. Makes perfect fucking sense.

 

Doug:
Vietnam? Hey, don't you be bringing John Kerry into this bad Red Sox mojo. He was in Vietnam you know.

 

Bill:
You're shitting me! I did not know that. You'd think that'd be part of his campaign or something. [Laughs] So do you think the Red Sox are in a quagmire?

 

Doug:
I do believe the Red Sox are completely mired in the quag.

 

Bill:
A motherfucking imbroglio?

 

Doug:
A veritable quandary, homeboy.

 

Bill:
Let's spark up that Eddie Murray incense already. I bet "I Get High" Manny has some handy.[Laughs]

 

Doug:
Nuscle up to some downhome stanky and let our uptight cracker jack asses bogart the first place joint.

 

Bill:
Don't worry, be happy. Yeah, that'll fucking work. Excuse me while I go take a bat to the company water cooler.

 

Doug:
Like a filthy hound in a time of elegant drawbridges, I ache with hope.

 

Author's Notes
Doug's reference to "process and outcome" is a reference to the Billy Beane/Theo Epstein school of thought as presented in Moneyball baby! ; while the "filthy hound" line from Letters to Wendy's Feb. 9, 1997.

Comments

dude, maybe these guys *DO* need some weed.

everybody calm the fuck down.

if you're not around for the misery you can't be around for the joy.

dubghx ryslcoq kcuaqohyd jprmnliv wszmdxc bnrexzl kejr

The comments to this entry are closed.

The Soxaholix eBook Spinoff

The captivating and long awaited Soxaholix eBook spinoff is finally available!

There's No Crying in Pocket Pool

cover

Purchase at Amazon.

T-shirt

Logo t-shirts now available, several colors, even pink.

'Soxaholix logo t-shirt